I'll Save You - Spirk

Chapter Seventy

*Spock's POV*

They blind folded us and tied our hands together before we got on a ship to take us away from Earth, away from my T'hy'la.

Once on the ship we were separated, shoved into different chambers. The one I was in was tiny, I had to stoop to avoid hitting my head and if I stood in the middle I could touch all four walls with my fingertips.

I sat as far from the door as I could and lifted my tied hands, trying to get the blindfold off.

It was pointless, who ever tied it had done it well and there was no way I could get it undone with my hands tied together, so I gave up quickly and began thinking about my situation instead.

The 'boss' was right, I was ready to die. How could I possibly live with myself, knowing what I have done to my T'hy'la?

Besides, what could I do? One wrong move and they could hurt my family, my friends - they may even hurt Jim.

I cannot risk that.

I do not know how long we were on the ship. If I have to guess I would say 3 or 4 hours, however it felt like days had passed when we finally reached another planet.

They took our blindfolds off once we had landed, and although the planet was dark, I was still able to recognise it.

It was fitting I suppose, this was the place it all started. This is where the first attack happened.

Jim and I shared our first kiss here. My heart throbbed at the thought and I tried and failed to push the emotions aside.

I was lead across the desert terrain for about an hour, Carol was to weak to walk so they dragged her instead.

We reached the side of a mountain and our captures stopped and began feeling along the rock. One of them let out a victorious shout as a slab of rock shifted with a grating sound.

Behind the fake cliff there were hundreds of stairs winding down into the earth.

The air grew steadily colder as we descended, and by the time we reached the bottom I was shivering violently.

It was clearly the same underground complex that Jim and I were held in last time, however a different part of it.

The stairs lead to a small, unfamiliar chamber with multiple corridors running off it. I did not recognise the cells we were taken to and locked in either.

As soon as Thomas and Jared left I moved to the door and examined the lock. It was strong and I instinctively knew I would not be able to break it like last time, so I quickly banished that idea.

"Carol? Are you okay?" I asked softly, moving closer to her and looking through the bars into her cell. She nodded, wiping her eyes and moving to lean against the bars.

I hesitated, then reached over and held my hand above her bare skin. "May I have your thoughts?"

I must know who the boss is, who the person responsible is.

Carol stared at me blankly for a moment before understanding lit up her features and she nodded.

I placed my hand lightly on her arm, then flinched away violently.

There was nothing there. No emotions, no thoughts lingering on the surface of her consciousness.

Her eyes were wide and hopeful, but her face fell when I shook my head. "Something's wrong. I cannot..." I trailed off, terrified.

My telepathy wasn't working, so either there was something terribly wrong with my mind, or there was something worryingly wrong with hers.

A tear dripped down her face and I settled myself on the ground next to were she sat, unsure as to how to comfort her.

"Starfleet are looking for you, I am sure they will find us soon enough." I muttered after a while and a look of complete despair crossed her face as she shook her head doubtfully.

I wanted to promise her that everything was going to be fine, but I doubted it myself.

I wanted to tell her that we would be okay, because Jim would never give up, but after I broke his heart I doubt he would care.

Thankfully I did not need to say anything, because Carol had fallen asleep, however my mind was now stuck on Jim.

His charming smile, his beautiful eyes, his hair that never sat flat, his sweet voice.

I was ashamed to find tears dripping down my face again. I wondered absently if I will ever run out of tears, or will I simply cry like the weak person I am until the day I die.

I deserve this, Jim gave me everything, and I gave him nothing but heartache in return.

I was so selfish in our relationship, I should have given more, all I did was take.

Now it is over, and all I can do is hope that he finds someone who can give him what he deserves. No one will ever be able to love him like I do, I just couldn't...... I didn't know how to show him, how to let him understand how much I love him.

I felt determination rising out of nowhere. I will survive this, and when I get out I will go back to Jim.

It does not matter if he no longer wants me, I will strive to show my love for him regardless of his feelings for me, or lack of.

If that means standing aside, loving and supporting him while he is with another, then so be it.

"We'll get out of this," I vowed quietly to Carol, who shifted in her sleep but did not wake up.