Sweet as a lemon | e.d

Chapter 37 | you're almost there

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I clenched my eyes shut in hopes of getting rid of the nauseating smell of my vomit but it served useless. I've sat here on Ethan's bathroom floor slumped over his toilet puking my guts out for over an hour. Ethan stroked my hair out of my face and while in any other situation I would have loved it, but right now I just wanted to rot in a hole. After another ten minutes my body was too exhausted to keep itself up. Ethan helped get me washed up & brush my teeth. Despite the minty taste I could still feel the vomit in the back of my throat & it disgusted me. This is why I don't drink. I'm a complete mess & I just end up getting a gigantic head ache anyways. I laid on Ethan's bed while he went to go get me a glass of water. Once he came back with the water I downed the entire cup.

"Careful, might puke it up all again." Ethan said.

"Ha ha you're hilarious really."

"Oh I'm not joking, drink that too fast it'll come back up the same way it went down." I wrinkled my nose in disgust & set the cup down on his bed side table. I adjusted Ethan's large shirt that he let me borrow since the clothes I was wearing had vomit on them.

"Sorry you had to pick me up."

"Stop acting like your presence is a nuisance in my life." My insecurity peaked but I did my best to shove it down my throat.

"You're right, I mean who wouldn't want to spend the night taking care of a puking Ophélia?" I chuckled at my wit.

"Only the lamest of people! At least when you're puking you're quiet." I scoffed and threw a shoe at him, he ducked before it could reach his stupid smug face. "Shut up! I don't even talk that much E."

"Are you kidding! You should've heard yourself when you were drunk, it was literal gibberish coming out of your mouth."

"It doesn't even count when you're drunk! That's literally the only time you've seen me drunk so how could you even know that I'm chatty."

"Because I am Ethan and I know everything." I scoffed & rolled my eyes.

"So, what made you go over to Zac's house?" My smile slid off my face a bit too quickly but I couldn't help it. Things were going so great too, I was able to forget about what my mom did.

"Ophélia?" My eyes snapped up to him as I quickly realized I had zoned out, a total give away that something happened. Now he would never leave me alone, but I kept quiet.

"Do you wanna talk about it later?" I looked up at him & nodded.

"Alright." I laid down with the tips of my toes touching the headboard. Ethan laid the opposite way with his head resting on a pillow. We stayed in a comforting silence since we had the entire house to ourselves.

"Faye kissed me at the New Year's Eve party." Well I surely wasn't expecting that. My stomach felt hot with jealousy even though I had no right to be.

"Oh." Was all I could say.

"Yeah."

"So what are you thinking?" The pause he took frightened me, was he still in love with her? Was he going to drop our friendship for his old life? All these questions were running so quickly in my mind that I almost didn't hear him respond.

"I'm not sure."

"Do you love her?" He let out a deep sigh.

"She was the first girl I've ever loved, I'm always going to love her, but we were never good for each other. The relationship was toxic with constant arguing over family & school. We were literally always fighting, & if I were to get back with her it'd be like taking my old life back, which I don't want. I'm ready to move on."

"Oh." Really Ophélia?! He just pored his thoughts out to you & all you can say is 'oh'.

"I kissed Grayson at the New Year's Eve party." I could see Ethan tense up almost immediately.

"Oh." His voice was laced with anger & it was stained, like he was holding back from what he really wanted to say, or scream I should say.

"I thought it was you."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I nearly choked on my own spit when I realized it wasn't." We fell into another silence, except this one was much more tense.

"Do you think we're gonna make it Ethan?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean as friends, in life, everything." He looked me in the eyes & squinted like he was in the middle of thinking what to say.

"Come here." I got up & laid besides him as his arm wrapped around my waist. Once we were comfortable, I felt his lips touch the top of my ear, sending chills all over my body.

"We're gonna make it Ophélia, in everything, we're gonna make it." I wish I could believe him, I really did, but it wasn't true. Ethan had so much more of a promising future, I didn't. It finally hit me that I really had nothing, not one penny to my name, & now I had no place to live. I was alone, even if I had Ethan, I never felt so alone.

The tears started to come rolling down my cheek & land on the pillow. Ethan noticed & propped himself up on his elbow as he looked at me with concern. I waited a while to make sure my voice didn't come out strained, with Ethan sitting there patiently.

"I hate her Ethan, I hate her so much." He ran his fingers through my hair & massaged my head in an affectionate way.

"Who?"

"My mom, she's so selfish, she honestly never thinks she does anything wrong! I mean she brought him into my home for god sakes!" I was now crying uncontrollably & I could probably pass as a walrus.

"Who did she bring into your home?" I hesitated & it took everything in me not to burst out hysterically. My ears felt red hot and I couldn't open my mouth without wailing in pain so I kept it shut. I waited until I was ready to say those nauseating words.

"She brought my dad into my home, and she praised him as if he was there the whole time! As if me and Margot weren't the result of an affair! He's a liar and a cheater but she still had the nerve to tell me to respect my father. How can he be my father when he was my first break? How am I supposed to respect someone who can't even respect themselves. Fathers are supposed to protect you not hurt you." By the time I finished my rant my body was weak and my head was throbbing. I just wanted to sleep & feel nothing.

"Shh, I know, I know, you're gonna be okay Ophélia. You're gonna make it." My eyes grew heavy from Ethan's calming gesture of stroking my hair to calm me.

Before I fell into a deep sleep Ethan whispered in my ear and said, "I'll be there with you, I'm not going anywhere."

•.•.•.•.•

"And if it makes you less sad I'll take your pictures all down."