Love You Goodbye (h.s. au)

08

"Oh hell no. You are not holing yourself up in here again."

The movement of my hand seizes and I carefully pull the calligraphic pen away from my self portrait. My eyes blink several times before I look up and see Zendaya standing at my doorway, her face twisted into a stern scowl and her hands on her hips. I furrow my eyebrows at her obvious displeasure with me, pushing my glasses higher up my nose while simultaneously brushing the blonde lose strands away from my face.

"What?"

"You're not staying in tonight," she shakes her head. "I will not allow it."

I cock my head, looking back down at my pretty much finished project. I was already done with it but I kept making slight small changes to the lips and eyes. Neither one looked right to me and I blame Harry for putting the idea in my head because now I can't look at it without seeing something wrong. The portrait was supposed to be about how I viewed myself which was with flaws and the dick is making me find flaws in my flaws. Asshole.

"I guess it's a good thing you're not my mother." I tell her with a small smile, going back to shade in my lips. One side looked thinner than the other...

I heard Zen scoff and then the sound of her feet stomping into my room. I didn't look up but the pen in my hand is suddenly ripped away and I screech. My eyes frantically look over my drawing to make sure it wasn't harmed, and once I see it was fine my eyes snap up to Zen in a heated glare. She merely tosses the pen across my room and I hear it land somewhere behind my dresser.

"What the hell! You could have messed me up, Zen! I've been working on this for two weeks!"

"Don't I know it, you've barely left your room." she whines and plops down at the edge of my bed. I pick up my drawing and roll it up, shaking my head with a loud sigh.

"I've been busy."

"With school?" She asks rhetorically. "I know you haven't been, otherwise explain the binge watching of 'One Tree Hill' I caught you doing last night."

"I wanted to see what happened between Peyton and Lucas in the motel. Sue me."

"You've watched the whole series four times already Av."

I purse my lips. "Well, I don't remember."

She rolls her eyes, throwing her hands up into the air in exasperation. "What's with you? Why won't you leave your room? Is it Zack? Did he contact you?"

I flinch at the sound of his name and scrunch my face up in disgust. "No, he didn't. And can we not ever say his name?"

"Sorry." She mumbles and crosses his arms. "Then what is it? You're not depressed are you?"

"No, Zen. I just don't want to go out."

She watched me for a long moment, eyes narrowed in scrutinization and when I look away in discomfort she shakes her head. "Too bad. You're going out with us tonight. No more excuses, you need to socialize."

She makes a beeline for my closet and begins tossing clothes on to my bed. "What are you doing? Stop, I don't-,"

"-want to. Yeah I know, but you're going to. My best friend didn't move into the same apartment as me just so she can hide in her room all the time. You came here so we could have fun together." She says and looks over her shoulder with hopeful eyes. "Don't you remember how excited you were to be living here with me? What happened to that?"

Guilt nudges my gut and I swallow, looking down at my hands that were on my lap. I was excited to live here, to be In college. But I guess somewhere along the line after Zack cheated on me with my cousin, I lost my motivation to hold up any kind of relationship. It was sad really, that I was letting my friendship weaken simply because Zack took away some of my ambition. My drive. My life.