La Douleur Exquise

One

"Why don't you just drop dead?" 

Darcie Scott has never been my biggest fan. And that's an understatement. In truth, she hates my guts. Ever since I started dating her best friend, Darcie has gone out of her way to hate me. Honestly, we can't be in the same room without one of us either starting an argument or threatening to kill each other. 

I guess that's how we ended up in mandatory mediation. Almost burning down one of the chemistry labs because we couldn't work together without arguing is enough for the principal to send us to 'therapy.' Not that this is really therapy, nor is it really working. 

We've given up most of our summer and we're still no closer to 'resolving our conflicts' as we were back in June when we started. If anything, forcing Darcie and me into a small, confined room for an hour a day with  the school counselor only added to our mutual dislike of one another. 

"Tell you what, I'll drop dead after you drop dead!" I yell back at the poisonous witch sat next to me. 

"Go fuck yourself, Campbell."

"How about you go-"

"Ok, that's enough!" The counselor finally snaps. Taking a quick glance at the clock, I'm amazed she managed to put up with fifty-seven minutes  of our constant bickering. Nevertheless, Mel Hastings, brought her thumbs up to circle her temples and closed her eyes tightly. "You two are seriously the worst couple I have ever had to mediate before."

From my side, I felt Darcie tense up. "We are not a couple."

"We're a pair," I said, finding myself in the rare situation where I was agreeing with Darcie. "A pair that hate each other."

"Whatever," the woman sat opposite us said, her eyes rolling. Reaching down to look at her notepad, she smiled slightly and then lifted her eyes to us. "Nixon, it says here that you're the quarterback on the football team. I heard from your coach that your Rally Girl quit the cheer team. Never worry, though, because I have come up with the perfect solution."

I frowned. There was no way this was going to end well for me. "What?"

Mel turned to Darcie and her smile widened disproportionately. "Darcie, you're a former cheerleader, right? Well," Mel motioned her hands between Darcie and I. "Nixon Campbell, meet your new Rally Girl, Darcie Scott."

Antonina Vasylchenko as Darcie Scott

Arthur Gosse as Nixon Campbell