Real or Not Real? (Tronnor) (boyxboy) (completed)

Chapter 26

Connor's POV

I am so thankful for Troye. So thankful that he came over here when I was in need. That he didn't let me cry myself to sleep. That he didn't let me be alone. That he cares. I don't think he will ever know just how much he helped me.

After my dad and siblings were in the crash, I kind of just. Died with them. I didn't talk to anyone. I didn't eat. I didn't sleep. Mom was so worried about me and I shouldn't have put her through that. She was having a terrible time too and she didn't need her only son to close the world out. I was so selfish not to see that at the time. I was all she had and I let her go through that alone by locking myself up and not talking to anyone.

God she didn't deserve that. What was I even thinking? I love her so much but I made her go through the worst time of her life, by herself. She needed me and I wasn't there for her. That's a terrible son right there.

"I'm so stupid" I say to myself, quietly, not realizing that Troye is awake. He runs his fingers through my hair gently and pulls me closer.

"Why do you say that?" He asks and I shake my head.

"It's nothing. I don't want you to have to think about it" I say and he sighs.

"Baby, you know you can tell me anything, and I'm willing to listen. You know that right?" He asks and I smile.

"Yea. And thank you for that" I say and he kisses me softly.

"Okay. So what's on your mind?" He asks and I sigh.

"I was just thinking about how, right after the accident, I just kind of left my mom. I didn't say anything to her. I closed myself up and wouldn't let her in."

"I guess I was just in shock that something so terrible could happen to our family. I couldn't process it and I definitely couldn't process that my mom needed me then more than ever. And I wasn't there for her. I let her go through that all alone. No one deserves that." I say and Troye is rubbing soothing circles into my back.

"You had gone through something terrible, Connor. It's not your fault. Please tell me that you know that" he says and I sigh.

"I should have been there for her. I was all she had. I let her down. She needed me and I wasn't there" I say and Troye wipes away a tear that has started to fall down my cheek.

"It's okay, Connor. I'm sure she understands that you were hurt. You lost them too. Not just her. I'm sure she understands." He says and I nod.

"I still feel bad" I say and he smiles.

"Well I have a way to make you feel better" he says and starts to lean in. Right before he gets to me I pull away and look him in the eyes. More serious than ever.

"You're talking about the coffee shop right?" I say and he laughs.

"Anything for you" he says. So we get up and make ourselves slightly presentable before going outside and starting the not so long walk to the local coffee shop.

As we walk, we hold hands and share a few quick kisses. A few weird looks are cast our way but we ignore them, knowing that causing a scene won't help anything.

When we get to the coffee shop we walk in and are surprised to see Tyler there. He jumps up, apologizes to whoever he is with, and comes over to us.