HOLLOW » Zarry ✔⚠

61

His father's lips purse and then he opens his mouth to speak. "Yes, I can talk. I did it because I felt that I could." He simply says.

"And what gave you the right to think that way? What in your fucked up head told you that touching me like that was right?"

Harry's father frowns. "Hey, don't you curse at me. I may be in jail, but I am still your father. You got it?"

"Shut up." Harry says as mild anger temporarily takes over him. "You are not my father. My father is at work protecting the city from people like you. He is a real father." Knowing that he has finally, officially disowned his father to his face, Harry puts his elbow on the counter, leans into his hand, then sighs very heavily. His father knows he's crying, but he stays quiet and watches him through the glass.

"I was six." Harry mumbles as his lips quiver. "I was six years old when you first started touching me. How could you do that to me? How could you treat me the way you treated me?"

"Let's get one thing straight. No matter what I did or said, I still loved you Harry-."

"-Stop it!" Harry yells and his lips tighten. "You did not love me. If you loved me, you wouldn't have made me do all those filthy things with you. If you loved me, you would have never given me to those men. I was eleven and you let them hurt me! And then you took money from them after you let them have their fun. You are sick."

His father fidgets. "Listen, I was the only parent you had. Be grateful. Your so called mother was too worried about her addiction to care about you."

"Be grateful? What world are you living in? And you stop talking about her. Regardless of what you say, she was still my mother. I know she would have done better with help. Do not say things like that."

"Still your mother?! No, all she is, is the woman who gave birth to you. You don't even know her. You can't even remember her. But I do. She didn't give a shit about you Harry. That pathetic little slut left us alone. Left me alone with you. Mothers don't do that."

"But fathers don't shove a knife into their own kid's arm or force them to give them hand jobs you son of a bitch."

His father begins to justify himself. "When that woman left, it was you who kept me from having a sex life. No woman wanted a man who already had a kid. So I used you instead to satisfy my pleasurable needs. And I only gave you to those men because we needed the money. You should be delighted that you were able to please me in so many ways, while helping us keep a roof over our head."

"Delighted? Are you fucking crazy?! You don't understand what you did to me! You changed my life! I have been going to therapist after therapist because of you. You scarred me forever in every way imaginable. And because of you..." There's a pause and a sniffle. "I can't even tell this boy I like him because I know that once I tell him, I won't even know how to show him I like him in the right way. All I know is everything you've ever done to me and that isn't right."

"Him? Oh so you're gay now?" He laughs obnoxiously, completely unfazed by Harry's little breakdown. "You know, I heard that little boys who get sexually abused have a greater chance of growing up to be a homosexual, but I did not expect to have a living example sitting right in front of me. Wow. But by no means should you ever feel embarrassed. You know how to please a man. I taught you almost everything. You were such a good little boy when you would pay close attention, remember?"

"Stop it." Harry mumbles and he shakes his head at those memories, uncontrollably spilling tears.

But his father continues. "Sometimes it haunts me that you were only twelve when I got put in here. Because you were still too young and we never got to do certain things that I really wanted to do with you. But when I first came in here, I used to get myself off to the memories we were able to make."

"Stop, right now."

"I used to imagine that my hands were yours. But it was so hard, honestly. Because my hands were way too rough. Did you know you had soft hands like your mother?"

"No. Don't talk about me in that way anymore. I'm sick of it."

"Why? Face it Harry. Face the truth. You did those things with me for six years. You're eighteen now and you turned out to be a faggot just like the statistics said you would. I wouldn't be surprised if in a year, you turned out to be a manwhore. But if you do, just make sure you and whoever you're with is always wearing condoms, okay? I wouldn't want you to catch AIDS."

"I SAID STOP IT, YOU PERVERT! YOU ARE A SICK, SICK MAN!" By now Harry has jumped up off the stool and began hitting at the glass. He's screaming with everything he has, tears still pouring heavily from his eyes. "YOU DESERVE TO DIE FOR WHAT YOU DID TO ME! YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO LIVE! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!"

"Hey! It's time for you to leave, sir!" The guard says to Harry but he continues to scream.

"HOW CAN YOU CALL YOURSELF A FATHER AFTER WHAT YOU DID?! YOU WERE AN EVIL, MANIPULATIVE AND MIND CONTROLLING PIECE OF SHIT! AND YOU STILL ARE!"

"You!" The guard is now coming his way at full speed, ready to grab him.

"BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?! I FORGIVE YOU FOR EVERY SINGLE THING YOU HAVE EVER DONE TO ME! ALL OF IT!"

Arms pull at Harry. But Harry is resisting as hard as he can, refusing to let the phone go until he finishes what he has to say.

"I WON'T SEE YOU EVER AGAIN! I'M NOT GOING TO LET IT GET TO ME ANYMORE! I'M GOING TO LET GO, PUT IT ALL BEHIND ME AND LAUGH AT YOU WHILE YOU ROT IN PRISON!

"Let go of the phone now, before you break it! If you do, I will put you in jail for destroying property and that is a guarantee! Do you want that sir?!"

Immediately when Harry hears that, he stops to look at the guard. He doesn't say anything. He just stands terrified. He looks scared, broken, needy and truthfully, Harry doesn't really know what to do. He sits the phone down on the counter not worrying about placing it back on the hook and he wipes his eyes with his and.

"Alright let's go." He mumbles. "I'm sick of looking at him anyway."

The guard grunts and begins to lead him from the visitation area and back toward the front of the jail.

Though Harry looks like he wants to be alone right now, he actually wants to fall into the guard's arms and cry into his uniform. But he knows it would be in vain because just like everyone else, this man won't understand his pain. This man will never know all he had to go through. He won't come close to knowing.

So he figures he'll just go home and seclude himself in his room. And then he'll figure out how he will go about accomplishing step 2.