another outsiders

guys night ... plus me

-Day 37-

So the guys came over except for Darry. He's to mature for his age I think, but he has a lot going on his plate I guess. I'm still kinda depressed about the brake up. Only Steve knows about it, and I'm pretty sure Soda knows to sense because those to are best buds. I wasn't really talking much and started dozing off on the couch. His couch is pretty comfy in my opinion, yet simple enough not to be the big statement of the room. It was an old leather couch that was probably used by some Socs or what not.

The room smells like cigarettes and beer. The only ones that are drunk is Dally, Steve and Two-Bit. Johnny was tipsy and Soda was acting like he was drunk even though he hasn't a a drink yet. Pony was hanging around them, not as quiet though. He was laughing really loud, making stupid comments and the whole thing. Looks like he's relaxed. I've been hanging around the couch while everyone else is in the kitchen. Looks like they're having a good time, me on the other hand is bored as hell. There's nothing to do here except see who passes out first and see how many cigarettes are in the ash trays around the apartment.

I was just about to fall asleep on the couch when Ponyboy sits next to me. I almost exploded with joy, I practically melted when I took a look at his eyes. Enough with my girl moments, everyone has those, right.(ladies you better be with me on this) I scooted over so that he would have room on the couch. I really want to sleep, not talk at all even though it's him.

"what's wrong with you, you've been pretty quiet for that last day or two" he asked
"Nothing" I said
"It don't seem like nothing too me"
"Why would you be wondering" I asked "it's not important anyways"
"Too who, the people that care about you or some random guy off the street"
"To no one"
"Katherine that's a lie"
"How would you know"

I hope he doesn't confess feelings because things will be awkward and if we break up, no one in the gang will ever be the same.

"I just know, so am I gonna find anything out or what"

I didn't speak, I felt like I needed to break down and cry and I won't let out a single tear. Tears are pain, not for brokenness and depression. I didn't want to tell him that Tyrone and I broke up, I didn't want to tell anyone. I told Steve because of the bet. Tyrone was the longest guy I've dated. I have about 16 or 17 ex's within the last 3 years. I've dated all of them no longer than a 3weeks, Tyrone and I were about 5 or 6 weeks and we were a lot closer than I thought we'd be.

I glanced at Ponyboy, than my hands and shook my head no. It just came to me that I get my cast off this weekend, and when I have to dye my hair. Freaking Steve, I wish I never made that bet with him. Pony scooted closer to me, I wanted to get up and grab a coke or something, but I couldn't pass up on this opportunity with this bonding moment. I get that might sound a little weird, everyone has there own things.

"So..." he said filling the silence in the air.
"What" I said

I glanced at his soft green eyes he looked at my gray blue eyes. That awkwardness lurked in the alcoholic smelling air. I couldn't help myself and smile just a bit, I tried holding it back, it wouldn't stay inside, a smile appeared on my face. I over heard all the talking from the kitchen.

"Hey look Pony's taking a shot on Kate" Johnny said
"He better not take a chance with her because I'm gonna kill him if he does" Two-Bit said
"What's the big deal, she's single now," Steve yelled "ain't that right doll face, he cut the ropes"

god damn it, he did not just say that out loud.

"Steve go to hell" I told him
"Watch the mouth kid" Two-Bit told me
"Says who" I was pickin for a fight, let's see if he takes the bait
"Wait with that loser, finally" Soda said
"You guys are done then?" Two-Bit asked
"Yeah"
"Sense when" Johnny asked. He acts like Steve when he's drunk
"Yesterday"

I yawned and leaned back on the couch. I closed my eyes slowly, I wasn't really asleep, but I could hear everyone talking and what not. It was about 11:50 the last time I checked the clock in the room, I tend to stay awake till 12 and that's it, 4 or 6 at parties. I have my eyes close, drifting to sleep. It feels like someone was watching me. Then it oddly got quiet, to quiet for a group of drunk guys. They must be planning something, what though, a prank or some way to scare me. That's gonna be hard to scare me, or maybe they think I blacked out or just died on the spot. (I did not die just fyi) they were all walking around I heard their footsteps stomping around the room making the floor shake. The door opened and more stomping went the door. Thank the Lord they left, I couldn't stand them being here right now. I guess they went down stairs. It's just Mr now in the room alone, looks like there having a guys night. I get it, they need to be themselves without someone like me around always bugging them. They probably think I'm gonna wait for them, but that's seems kind of stupid to me. I'll fall asleep instead, if I can.

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Hey everyone, sorry this one here was ridiculously long and maybe boring. Anyways, thanks.for reading and stuff like that and yeah I think that's pretty much it for right now

-stay gold k