18
Alyssa continued to hug Dennise until the trembling of her shoulders finally ended. Dennise was still crying when she kissed her hair and then her forehead.
She patiently waited for Dennise to say something but when Dennise stepped a foot away from her hug, she knew she had lost her chance.
"Den, please." Still, Alyssa tried. She kept Den's hand in hers in hopes of keeping her with her for the night.
Dennise peered at Alyssa quickly through the blur of her tears before she shook her head and gently pulled her hand away from her girlfriend's hold. She turned around and walked back inside the room where she curled in the bed, under the comforter.
Left behind stunned on her feet, she knew the blame was on her. It would have been a perfect night. She was actually looking forward to seeing Dennise after a long day but her insensitivity just had to ruin it for her.
I am sorry I am not her. It just kept on repeating agonizingly. The way Dennise broke her voice trying to get the thought across her resonated in her head.
"When will you learn, Alyssa?!"
She threw herself into the bathroom to have a nice shower she thought she did not deserve before she changed into a set of fresh clothes she was keeping for the guests as she just could not walk inside the room for her wardrobe.
It never occurred to her she would be using the other room again until this night. She hated to be reminded of it but a clear memory of her being in the same four cornered smaller room of light green wall painting every time she and Laura had an argument brought her to the realization that so much things have changed by now. This time, behind the wall was Dennise. Not Laura.
She finally snapped out of the blame game and shuffled to her feet. She had no plan. She even was sure she would not be able to pull out the right words out of her mouth or if Dennise would still listen. But she still persisted.
Alyssa found Dennise clutching a pillow, her back turned against her. She dimmed the lights and the space left for her on her side of the bed gave her a speck of hope that maybe Dennise was giving her the chance to get it right tonight.
She carefully lied down next to her. She closed the gap in between but the distance seemed to have gone out of her reach even with her arm extended to hug Dennise. The other one, though still awake and was aware of Alyssa's presence, provided not even the slightest response. "Good night, Den. I love you."
She is just upset, Alyssa. Wait for her. She will come around... She hoped against the uncomfortable silence.
It was the next morning and Alyssa woke up to the sun beaming through the raised window blinds. There was no Dennise beside her. She immediately got up and ran outside to find her.
"You are early," she sighed in relief when she saw Dennise.
"Yeah," Dennise hesitated a little. She slipped her feet into her shoes before picking up her bag. "I am going."
"Huh? How about breakfast?"
"I'll grab something."
"Den, teka. Let me drive you to Ateneo."
"Don't bother, Alyssa. I really need to go. Bye." She did not wait for her to answer. Dennise just walked straight out of the door.
"Damn it." Alyssa cursed.
