Strings in the Beginning (Abrupt Series #2)

EPISODE 12

Ngumuso siya at tinuro ang paper bag ko. "Kahit isang bote lang? Wala akong makukuha?"

Napabuntong-hininga ako. Wala sa sarili kong binuksan ang bag gamit ang kaliwang kamay, saka tumingin sa kanya nang may kunot-noong ngiti.

"Kumuha ka na."

He didn't move. Sa halip ay tinuro niya ang bakal na puting mesa sa harap ng apartment ko.

"Gusto ko rin uminom ngayong gabi. Pero kasama ka."

I got chilled with his words hanging between us like a challenge that I wasn't sure I was ready to accept. "Upo muna tayo doon," he said softly, his eyes meeting mine. "Let's talk. I really want to talk with you."

Then I felt something when I heard it from him. I hated him. But in that moment, I hated myself more dahil pakiramdam ko ay gusto ko rin siyang makausap.

This wasn't part of the plan, being alone with him at midnight, caught in yet another conversation that I didn't want to have. Hindi pa ba siya kuntento sa mga sinabi ko?

Humihirit pa talaga siya?

I watched him settle into one of the three chairs surrounding the small white table na itinuro niya. The table was meant for tambay sessions, iyon ang sabi ng may-ari, perfect daw para sa inuman o kwentuhan. Pero bihirang gamitin kasi malamok.

Tonight, though, Conrad seemed perfectly content sitting there, as if the mosquitoes didn't exist or as if I wasn't fuming at what he was doing.

"Talagang umupo ka pa diyan. Hindi mo ba ramdam ang lamok?" I asked, crossing my arms, irritation evident in my tone.

He glanced under the table, then looked up with a slight shrug. "Hindi ko naman ramdam, I'm wearing slacks. Dito na lang ako, baka kasi ayaw mo'kong papasukin sa loob."

His voice carried that teasing edge that used to disarm me before. Now, it only made my jaw tighten. But then he smiledone of those smiles na parang siya lang ang may karapatang ngumiti ng gano'n.

I suddenly found it hard to look at him directly. Even in the dim light of the outdoor bulb, his face was annoyingly... nakakainis. Nakakairita.

"Halika ka na. Kumuha ka pa talaga ng oras para mag-inarte. I'm wearing shorts kaya baka ako naman ang kagatin ng lamok. Kung gusto mo mag-isa, diyan ka na lang uminom. Papasok na ako."

I turned my back on him, gripping the paper bag tightly. Nngunit napapikit ako ng mariin ang maalala kong hindi ko pa pala siya nabibigyan ng soju, the one he sugeested to give to him.

Ang tanga ko talaga.

Just as I reached for the screen door, I already felt his presence. Hindi ko man siya makita, pero ramdam kong nakasunod siya. Napahinga ako nang malalim, forcing myself to stay calm.

Hindi ako nagsalita dahil dumiretso na agad akong pumasok sa loob. I need to check my two cats at nang masiguro kong pareho silang nasailalim ng kama ko ay maliit akong ngumiti.

Sinarhan ko rin ang pinto at nag-iwan lang ako ng kaunting space para kung lalabas ay hindi sila mahirapan.

Bumaling naman ako kay Conrad at nakatayo na siya sa tapat ng dining table ko. Kalalapag niya lang ng car keys niya at sunod niyang ginawa ay inilabas isa-isa pinamili sa loob ng paper bag.

"Do you have an iced cube? Medyo hindi na siya malamig, masarap kasi 'to kapag malamig."

I breathe normally habang kinukuha ang ibang kalat na nakakasira ng living room. I glanced at him.

"Sa freezer meron, kumuha ka na rin ng baso mo."

He looked at me. "Hindi ka magbabaso?"

Mabilis akong umiling at lumapit sa lagayan ko ng labahan malapit sa lababo. Mabuti nga at malinis naman ito tingnan dahil bago ako umalis kanina ay hinugasan ko na ang mga ginamit ko.