Rejected by one Alpha, Loved by another

Chapter 65 - Confessions part 2

Jaxon's POV

I've always been a man of action, but these past four days have been a test of my patience and my love for Esme. She's been missing for four days, and I can't shake the feeling that something terrible has happened to her, my skin is itchy and my hands are clammy to shit. I know she's not dead, because if she was, I'd be a wreck, unable to function and feeling as though I have died as well, and I probably would feel like I have died if she did but I have our two children to hold onto right now, even though I can't think straight. But the thought of her being out there, alone and scared, is enough to drive me mad.

Our children, have been my saving grace and my ass because I am ready to kill in my wife's name and I don't and have never thought I would need or want to do that. They don't understand what's going on, but I've tried my best to comfort them, to make them feel safe. I've held them close, read them bedtime stories, and tucked them in at night before going out hunting again. I have been through our woods and to the open woods where rogues travel but I have managed to keep my distance from them by using a wolf less scent. But my mind is always on Esme, on finding her and bringing her home.

The pack house is a place of warmth and love, but now it's filled with a sense of dread. The walls seem to close in on me, the pack have been avoiding me but I can see their worry. and the air is thick with worry big time, it's their Luna out there, scared and probably not knowing what's happening. I've searched every inch of the high field lands which is where we are located. I questioned everyone who'd been at the ball, but no one seems to know anything or see anything. How convenient.

Dylan, and his girlfriend have been under my scrutiny. They were the last ones to see Esme, at the Ball, But they swear they haven't seen her since then. I've inspected their every move, but I can't find any evidence to suggest they had anything to do with her disappearance.

My mind is a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions. I can't focus on anything else but finding Esme. I've spent countless hours poring over security footage that Luca had and even he is a mess and he hasn't known her long. I saw her smile at some people as she passed, watched her smiling and then dashing off, I watched her enter the bathroom and then my veins once again after watching it for the millionth time watched as she was carried out.

The pack is growing restless. They can sense my anger, and it's starting to affect them. I can't let my emotions get the best of me, though. I have to stay strong for my family, for my pack.

"Baby, your going to tire yourself out. Let your father and Charlie take tonight's outing and you sleep with your babies. They need you" she says and I know she means well by it all, she is scared too. Esme has been through way too much shit in her life. She has not had an ounce of a break and I don't know what to do.

"I don't know what to do mom. I am terrified that she won't come home but I can't...I don't know where to look" I say back, holding the tears that are there. My life had always been smooth sailing, Parents who loved us and would do anything for us, a brother who was my best friend, a life of a good education and friends to laugh with. I became an Alpha and I have proved myself to be an Alpha male man, I have proved my loyalty to the pack over the years, showing them that they can trust me with their life and there needs but now...I feel useless. Pathetic. Like I can't even look after my wife! I wasn't there when she was taken.

"Sweetheart. She will be home!" she says and then she gasps as if she remembered something "Hold on..." my mother says which makes my head snap her way. "JACOB!"

"What is it? have they found her?" and this is what I mean...everyone is working above everything else in the pack to find her and I am so grateful to have them here. If I didn't have them here then I would more likely be a complete mess.