CHAPTER 20

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HAYAT POV:

Times flying really fast now. It’s been three weeks since the commotion and three weeks since I haven’t visited the place like before, I have been ignoring everyone these days, even Ahad too.... he sends voice messages of peer-e-kamil daily at night and does a shabakhair(good night) and subhabakhair(good morning) message to me daily and I haven’t replied to him for weeks now....

I have got the admission done, and soon I’ll join the university after marriage, but as the marriage date is coming near, I’m getting scared, scared of the reactions my family will give after seeing my wedding card, we did a small meeting and there from my side only chacha chachi joined, I did called Sana and told her to come but she refused, my step mother doesn’t have a phone or else I would have called her too, she did made my memories beautiful while I lived there, but let’s forget it for now.....

I’m getting a call from Ashar again. This idiot has been calling me for three weeks now. Daily, I get 5 to 10 calls from him, I need to ask him which package he does that he calls me everyday now, and the call which I do not attend, obviously.....

It’s Monday today, I have changed my entire wardrobe after everything that has happened the last few weeks, I’m turning to my old self, the self I shared with Eira only, I want to change myself for better now, I don’t feel entitled to change myself for the marriage but I’m trying to find my old self.....

Wearing a blue kurta with net dupatta on side, securing my hairs in a bun, I applied the moisturizer and a lip balm, having acne on my face were one of the things I was most insecure about when I was young till I met Eira who made me love myself the way I am....

Coming out of my room, I looked for chachi, finding a little note on the dining table I took it and read “chanda, take as much time you want, no one is angry or upset with you, we will wait for our chanda to come to us when she needs us, ohh BTW I’m going with your mother in law to distribute cards” I took the note pad and write down some thing for her and went out.....

Chachu has always spoiled me. My father did not give me a card to get myself anything I want any time, but my chachu did. My step mother never made food for me, but my chachi did. Every time I remember the old memories, it’s always with chacha chachi.....
I went to join some cooking classes and took myself to get myself a abbaya, when I had a chat with Ahad for the first time he said he doesn’t have a problem with me not wearing abbaya but he’ll love it if I wear it so I thought to give it a try...

Getting myself everything I wanted, I finally took my phone from the passenger seat and called Ahad directly....

The phone rang for some time and the call was cut from his side, I looked at my phone and thought to call Ashar when my phone rang again with his number....

“Asalam Mualaikum,” He said...

“Walaikum Asalam, ap kesy hain (how are you)?” I replied and waited for his reply....

“Main theek ho Alhamdulillah, ap batao kesi ho ap (I’m good Alhamdulillah, how are you?)” I hmmm in response and did not speak out, I didn’t knew what to say to him, I wanted to talk to him but what should I say? I thought to myself and waited.....

We were silent for some minutes when I heard someone from behind “bhai, meeting suru ho gayi ha a jao yarrr (bhai meeting has started already, come now)”  I heard Ahad “shusshh, I’m talking to your bhabi, you attend the meeting instead of me”

“You can go and attend the meeting, I’ll call later,” I said, whispering slowly....

“No, you talk to me, Hayat,” I heard him saying calmly.....

“I wanted to talk, but I don’t know what I should talk about,” I said, finally not knowing how to start a conversation with him...

“Okay, then tell me, did you have your lunch?” He asked, to which I hmmm, “did you get your admission done?” He asked, I hmmm this time too, “Hayat, I missed you. “ He said, I was shocked for sometime, composing myself “I’m sorry for ignoring you, Ahad.” I spoke meowing like a little cat “my wild cat should not be sorry, if you wants space, I’ll give it to you, if you want to talk, I’ll talk, if you want to go anywhere, I’ll take you, I’ll be there with you on each step you take, just hold my hand and led me the way, I’ll there” I smiled.....

“I’m scared of this marriage,” I said to him truthfully...

“Why?” He asked

“I don’t know, what if I won’t be a good wife? What if I won’t be able to manage everything? What if I won’t be able to exceed the expectations you all have from me? What if –“ I was cut off my him...

“Hush, itna kiu soch rahi ho, kisi ki liye apne ap ko change krne ki zaroorat nhi ha, kisi ki expectations ka bary ma ap mat socho, unko sochne do bss, mere liye achi wife hi hogi ap, fikr krne ki zaroorat nhi, sab manage ho jaye ga or ma b ho apna sath, humesha rahu ga to fikr mat kry ap, theek hain (Hush, why are you overthinking so much? You don’t need to change yourself for anyone. Don’t worry about others’ expectations, let them think. You’ll be a good wife for me, no need to stress. Everything will work out, and I’ll be there for you. Don’t worry, everything will be fine.)” He said and waited for me to answer....

I wanted to look at his face right now, his calm expression while him saying all these, but let’s not forget I have been ignoring him, “I’ll ignore you in the future too like this, I’m really moody and I have an habit of being straight on the faces, I will fight and be childish too” I said and cut the call, taking a deep breath I drove to the Seaview to enjoy this cold weather a little bit....

Getting myself a cup of coffee, I took out my phone to see Ashar calling me, and this time, I picked it up, “You dumb, idiot, crazy woman, you ignored me for three weeks straight and now you are talking to Ahad bhai.!!!! Where the hell I’m on the list? When were you planning to call me and give me an explanation? You dumb.” Hearing his loud voice, I kept my phone a little away from my ear to save my poor ear, “I’m sorry, I have been going through a lot these days” hearing him sighing “you okay now? Do you want some company? I can get a day off from bhai, or I can send him to look after you?” I smiled and said, “Will you and Ahad like to join me for a trip to Hyderabad to her my dream bangles and jhumka(earrings) for the wedding?” I asked, hoping to hear a yes, “Oh why won’t I stupid, I’ll talk to bhai, and we’ll meet you at our place, wait a second, won’t I be a third wheel?” Hearing him, I replied immediately. “Ahh, no, I’ll get to know you both better on our way there, I have asked chachu, and he doesn’t have a problem” hearing him saying okay we cut the call and I made my way to home to dress in some comfortable clothes, packing some essentials and some snacks everything ready, I hugged chacha chachi and got out to drove away....




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1320 words

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