Chapter seventeen

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I don't know, I don't know

Should I stay or should I go?


Nebula supported Tony down the steps. Steve came running towards them and grabbed Tony from the daughter of Thanos.

Tony panted and looked back at Nebula with a thankful look in his eyes, then he turned and stumbling followed Steve.

"Couldn't stop him." Tony said.

"Neither could I." Steve answered and supported the man as they walked.

"Hang on," Tony said and stopped walking. He stared into the captain's eyes and panted. "I lost the kid." He breathed out. Peter's dissolving body flashed through his mind.

"Tony, we lost."

His lower lip quivered, and he swayed. "Is, uh...?"

Pepper came running and stopped centimeters from her boyfriend. "Oh, good." Tony breathed.

"Oh, my God!" Pepper hugged him tightly. "Oh, my God!" She sobbed.

Tony kissed her on the cheek.

"It's okay." He muttered. They began walking, both Steve and Pepper supporting Tony.

***

"It's been 23 days since Thanos came to Earth." Rhodes spoke.

"World governments are in pieces." Natasha spoke and looked at the remaining heroes. "The parts that are still working... are trying to take a census and it looks like he did..."

Tony sat in a chair in a robe. He stared at the blipped people's faces. At one point Peter Parker's face showed up, and he had to look away to not break down.

"He did exactly what he said he was gonna do. Thanos wiped out... 50% of all living creatures." Natasha continued.

Tony took a deep breath and rubbed his forehead.

"Where is he now? Where?" he asked.

"We don't know." Steve answered with crossed arms. "He just opened a portal and walked through."

Tony sighed. "What's wrong with him?" he asked and pointed to Thor.

"Oh, he's pissed." Rocket spoke up from the floor. "He thinks he failed. Which, of course, he did, but there's a lot of that going around, ain't there?"

Tony looked perplexed at the talking racoon. "Honestly, until this exact second I thought you were a Build-A-Bear."

"Maybe I am."

"We've been hunting Thanos for three weeks now." Steve spoke up. "Deep space scans... and satellites, and we got nothing." Steve looked at Tony. "Tony, you fought him."

"Who told you that?" he asked. "I didn't fight him. No, he wiped my face with a planet while the Bleecker Street magician gave away the store. That's what happened. There was no fight, 'cause he's not beatable."

"Did he give you any clues, any coordinates, anything?" Steve stared at him.

"Uh..." Tony sputtered. "I saw this coming a few years back. I had a vision. I didn't wanna believe it. Thought I was dreaming." He waved his hand around.

"Tony, I'm gonna need you to focus." Steve stood up.

Tony closed his eyes and leaned his head on his hand. "And I needed you." He looked up at the soldier. "As in, past tense. That trumps what you need. It's too late, buddy. Sorry." He leaned forward a bit and sniffed. "You know what I need? I need a shave." He said and knocked a tray over as he stood up. "And I believe I remember telling all youse..." he said and began ripping the drops off his arm.

"Tony, Tony!" Rhodes tried to stop him.

"...alive and otherwise, that what we needed was a suit of armor around the world. Remember that?" Tony raised his voice. "Whether it impacted our precious freedoms or not. That's what we needed."

"Well, that didn't work out, did it?" Steve asked.

"I said we'd lose." Tony said. "You said, "We'll do that together, too" And guess what, Cap? We lost." He looked Steve into the eyes. "And you weren't there. But that's what we do, right?" He stumbled back a bit. "Our best work after the fact? We're the "Avengers"" Rhodes grabbed Tony as he raised his voice and stumbled. "We're the "Avengers," not the "Pre-vengers."" Tony looked at Rhodes.

"Okay." Rhodes spoke.

"Right?" Tony asked and stared at Rhodes while pointing at Steve.

"You made your point. Just sit down, okay?" Rhodes said.

"Okay. No, no, here's my point. You know what?" Tony looked at Steve. "She's great by the way." Tony pointed at Carol.

"Tony, you're sick. Sit down." Rhodes held him.

"We need you. You're new blood. Bunch of tired old mules." Tony got free of Rhodes's grip and walked towards Cap. "I got nothing for you, Cap." He said and pointed at him. "I got no coordinates... no clues, no strategies, no options." He said as he moved closer. Steve only stared at him in silence. "Zero. Zip. Nada. No trust, liar." He whispered. Tony ripped the arch reactor off his chest and breathed shakily.

He put it in Steve's hand. "Here, take this." He spoke. "You find him, you put that on..." he hitched in a breath. "You hide," he said and pointed at him. His legs gave after, and Tony fell to the floor.

"Tony!" Steve exclaimed.

"I'm fine." Tony said shakily. "Let me..." he breathed heavily then passed out.

When Tony woke up again, he was in a bed. He blinked and looked out a panorama window to his left.

"Hey, how are you feeling?" Pepper asked and smiled softly at him. He turned his head to look at her.

"I'm fine." He answered.

"Okay," she whispered. "Do you want something to drink?" she asked. Tony shook his head and took a shaky breath.

"Where's Percy?" he asked after some quiet time. He needed the kid. He needed to know he was okay. He needed to hold him. He met Pepper's eyes.

She looked through the window into the common room, then she looked back at her boyfriend. "He... Percy was blipped." She answered.

Tony stared at her for some time before he spoke up, "You're kidding, right?" he looked hopeful at her, but it was only crushed when she shook her head. "He's..." he whispered. His voice faded and tears gathered up in his eyes. He hid his face in his hands and let out a sob. He had failed his sister. He had failed his nephew. He had failed to protect the vulnerable Percy Jackson, and now he was gone. He had lost so much in the fight. He had lost his friends... Peter... and now Percy. How many others did he have to lose?

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