Things ALWAYS Change Baby Girl *Princeton Story*

Breaking

Jacob's POV

I think I broke Crystal, not that you can break a human being (I know she's not a toy) but she's broken. She looks off into space all the time and if she's not looking into space then she's crying in her lap. I've done something horrible. I don't know if she's depressed but I don't want her to have what I have. I caused this. She could be like me. Poor, innocent Crystal could turn into what I've become. She can have destructive thoughts and she could confuse herself, all because of me spreading this to her. Maybe this is a virus, maybe I'm a virus.

I broke someone I love. How can I deal with myself? How could I possibly think of hurting her? How stupid am I?

I watch her from the beach. Her hands holder over her chest as she sits up straight and stares into the mirror. By Crystal's face, I can see her crying silently and to lazy or just seeing the pointlessness of wiping them away. After awhile she goes away and takes pills then goes to sleep. I take a swim to possibly clear my head then get out to get something to eat. Once I'm in the kitchen nothing looks appealing so I go upstairs and go straight in the shower to wash away the salt water.

When I come out with a towel wrapped around my waist Crystal is asleep. I pick up the huge pack of NyQuil she bought a week ago and I'm shocked to see its half empty. I shake my head and go in the bathroom flushing them down the toilet.

-

"Did you see my NyQuil?" Crystal ask after her seven hour nap. I throw the empty case at her and ball my hands into fist at her behavior. She can't just take them like its candy. Crystal picks the bottle up and sighs. "Where are the pills?"

"In the garbage. Where they belong."

Crystal throws the bottle at me having it bounce off my head. I groan and stand up walking to her. Crystal rolls her eyes and opens her arms in the air. "Go ahead. I don't care anymore. I don't care what you do to me. Life's a bitch right?"

"God, Crystal, don't speak like that." I sigh and pull at my hair. Why is she acting like this? I don't act like this. She surrenders when she's upset and I fight. What are we? How is this relationship okay? Is this relationship okay?

Crystal runs up the stairs hurrying into the room then slamming the door. I sigh and walk up the stairs pulling out more hair just confused. I open the door and let go of my hair dangling in my hand. "I'm sorry Crystal. Just don't be so dead. You used to be so lively and energetic. What do you want to do? We can go to the restaurant of you want. Or shopping, retail therapy? Just tell me what you want. Just don't do this to yourself."

Crystal turns her head making her back face me as she lays down. I see her reflection in the glass and once she notices she places her hand over her face. I sit down at the edge of the bed twisting my fingers back. "I'll take my medicine. I'll do whatever you want. I'll take it right now and you won't have to sneak it to me. I'll get one of those daily pill containers. Serious. I'm deal you. I promise you. I'll take one right now." I stand up and walk to the bathroom pulling out a box of orange containers filled with pills. I quickly drink them and throw my head gulping hard.

I walk back out and do a turn. "I took them. No applause?"

Crystal starts crying again. I rush over to her and she curls herself into a ball with a pillow clutched to her chest. I rub her arm softly trying to calm her down but she doesn't. "Shit Crystal." I shake her and she pushes me off of her burying her head in the pillow until you can see her ponytail and the edge of her ear. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you like this. Come on Crystal you can't cry. Crying sucks right? Maybe we can laugh instead. I'm sorry just breath regularly. Everything's fine Crystal. Life isn't a bitch it's beautiful. I'm so sorry." I bend down and place my arms over her. She stops suddenly then runs to the bathroom locking the door.

I sit on the bed feeling the weight of my actions for the first time. I pushed my mother out and now she's dying, I can't even take to the fucking lady anymore. I pushed my best friend out of my life and now he hates me. I kept the love of my life in mental torture and now she's a cry machine. What have o done with my life but make it a hole of regret.

Crystal comes back out and looks at me. Her hair is pulled together in a ponytail and her clothes hang loosely on her spare figure. "Can I move back in with my dad?"

I don't know why she asked me. Of course I don't want her anywhere but here but she should have told me not asked. Her quavering voice in a question makes it certain that she must be afraid of me.

I clasps my hands together and lean on to my knees. "Why are you asking."

"I don't want to get you mad- I don't- I guess- well you know what happened last time I tried to leave. Um I think maybe it's best. I don't know. If you say no I won't bring it up again promise. Don't get mad."

Knowing she's hurt and that she's changed so much over the time we've been together I know I should let her go. I would be best for her. To deal with things with her dad and possibly school and for me to reconnect with old friends or talk to my mom a little. I need help, I know and maybe after everything she needs help.

I still don't want to say yes you can go. What if this is a test? What if I'm suppose to tell her I love her and I can never let her go? What if she likes it here? I can't not talk to her.

I stand up and her eyes go wide. "It was stupid forget it. I'll stay here." She says and sits on the bed away from me.

"Crystal you can-"

"No Jacob don't talk about it." She lays back down sighing softly.

I lay next to her facing her. Both of us staring at each other until her eyes become heavy. I kiss her and she doesn't react just goes to sleep. "Crystal you can go to your dad's."

"But I don't want to go to your funeral."

••••••••••

Crystal's nervous that Jacob will hurt him self?😰

How do you feel about Jacob's thoughts on "breaking" Crystal? 👀

Are you sad for Crystal or mad that she didn't leave him?

Comment and vote! Thank you guys for reading!