Supernatural Preferences & Imagines

➸ Dear Dean ➸ Dean Winchester Part 2

I grip onto you tighter as a tear slightly runs down my face and my chest starts to heave. My labored breathes now have become shallow and irregular. I hear Sam come into the room and inspect everything.

"Sammy we're going to need to get the gasoline." I say and my lips starts to tremble.

➸

We have already prepared y/n for burning in the bunker's backyard. I just want to grab your things to burn it with you before it is goodbye for good. I want to come to peace with this, with the choice you chose. I just want to understand why.

I am sitting on your bed starring up at the ceiling you probably looked up at for hours. You were in your room for days, you had to do something in the meantime. You probably thought about the decision for days.

I should have known.

"Dean? You alright?" Sam asks as he swings his body into the doorway of y/n's room. He looks around and the room is exactingly how it was after you died but minus the blood and your body. The room is pristine because I haven't had the guts to touch anything. I just want to suck up this moment so it will be forever sketched into my mind.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine." I say as I shake myself out of my daze. "I was just grabbing her things so we could burn it with her. I don't want to keep anything of hers." I pause then look around her room. "Unless you want to take something, gladly take it."

"Burn it with her? You don't want to keep anything for yourself?" Sam asks surprised by my statement. He stares at me and then at your room.

I nod my head and lift myself off the unmade bed. I look over your room again and start to walk out of your room.

"Tell me when you're done grabbing the things you want." I mutter as I walk out of your room not waiting for Sam to answer me back.

I slug through the halls towards the kitchen for a beer. As I grip the beer's glass the coldness cools down my sweaty palms. The refreshing cold alcoholic drink cools and yet warms my insides all at the same time.

➸ Sam's pov ➸

I look around y/n's room and it feels lonely in here without you in here to keep the walls company. I start the task Dean gave me by walking to your only table in your room to see if it has anything I want to salvage for myself and/or Dean. I know he is grieving for y/n and just looking at your room probably makes him want to ball into tears, I know the feeling. I know he liked you a lot too so, probably not telling you before you . . . died probably makes him regret everything and blame himself for your decision.

When I reach the desk there is only somethings spread across the desk, covering the top of the desk. Papers, some of your fantasy books, pens, pencils, sketches, your computer, a clock and a leather book clutter the surface of the table. I reach out towards your computer and look at the your latest searches. There was: How do you know when a guy likes you?, Suicidal hotlines, What is the cleanest and easiest way to do suicide?. And it keeps going and going. These searches bring tears to my eyes. You've been thinking about this for awhile and you didn't come to me or Dean for help.

I close out of the search bar and put your computer on your bed, angry with the results I got. I continue on with the search and grab the papers. It is research on archangels, i.e. Lucifer or Raphael, and the meaning behind their names. It is mostly junk. I pick up the papers and place them into your trash bin.

I search through the sketches next and they're sketches of me and Dean. Some are of this girl I've never seen before. There is also this older looking women that looks a lot like y/n. I place the sketches with the computer and put the clock in the trash can along with the pens and pencils.