Labyrinth

Countdown - Day 1

I couldn't sleep the whole night.

I stayed up all night thinking about what I would say to father.

I never, NEVER, missed sleep.

It was bad for health and it didn't help in having a calm mind. And since I'd be awake the entire night I just knew it was bad.

The sun was starting to rise as I got up from bed.

It was a total waste to stay up all night. I couldn't think of anything to say to father.

My head and body were hurting.

–

“The Crown Prince asked me to get married to him.” That was the truth. He did ask me that just with a few extra steps.

I couldn't avoid father forever. This morning I'd escape the house early saying I had training classes but in reality I had them in the evening. And then I'd spend my time wandering around in town until I came back home with a furious father waiting for me to answer his questions.
I had thought of quite a few excuses, like “We talked about accounting and management.” or “We talked about the trades and small businessman who weren't happy with their lack of privileges.” or “Oh we just had a tea party father.”

But they all sounded ridiculous. Moreover, even if he'd take my words I wouldn't be able to hide the truth for long and he'd be disappointed to know I lied to him.

And so, here I was, in his office again, talking about the Crown prince, it was something I'd have laughed about if you told me a few years beforehand that his highness would ask me for a fake marriage with him.

“What...do you mean, Rose?” he was shocked, a mixture of calmness and shock.

“His highness, the Crown Prince asked me to be his empress.” my chest hurt. It was something that didn't make me feel good. How could I be an empress of a whole country?

“And...? Did you agree?”

I couldn't look at him.

“I said I needed time to think–”

“Rose.” he said in his calm yet loud and deep voice. “You're not planning on rejected his highness, are you?” he chuckled, “Who in their right head would reject that offer?”

Ah.

“Get married, Rose. You will do great as an empress.”

I didn't expect that? Why was he being...so forceful?

“I, I don't know father–”

“Just, accept. it. Rose. Do you know what this means? We won't just be heads of a House. We'll become a part of the Royal Family! Do you know what that means?!”

I looked at his face. He looked desperate. It felt like I could be consumed by him any moment if I disappointed him.

I was so surprised that no words came out of my mouth for a second.

“Yes I know. I'll take my leave now.”

I was scared. He was the only person I was this scared of.

“Don't only think about yourself Rosemarie.” he said.

I walked out of his office and particularly ran into my room. Layla wasn't around and I didn't complain. I needed space.

Don't only think about yourself Rose.
Don't only think about yourself Rose.
Don't only think about yourself Rose.
Don't only think about yourself Rose.
Don't only think about yourself Rose.
Don't only think about yourself Rose.
Don't only think about yourself Rose.
Don't only think about yourself Rose.
Don't only think about yourself Rose.
Don't only think about yourself Rose.
Don't only think about yourself Rose.
Don't only think about yourself Rose.
Don't only think about yourself Rose.

Those words kept running in my head. When did I start thinking about myself? When did I EVER think about myself?

My head was loud.

Father doesn't care. He just wants me to get married. I wonder how disappointed he'd be when he learns about our divorce.

I hated them. I hated father. I hate the Crown Prince. I hate mother for leaving me. I hated this house. I hated this system. I hated how people had their power and control over me and I couldn't do a damn thing about it.

I hated myself.

“My lady?! Are you okay?” Layla run over to me when she saw me laying on my bed.

“I'm fine Layla. I'd just like to be left alone for today.” I said.

She looked nervous for a moment but nodded and went away.