Labyrinth

Memories

The 13th, as we decided would be the engagement day.

The preparations had already started as if it wasn't 2 weeks away.

The Prince said we could invite our family and close friends. I didn't have any family besides father and as for friends, the only people I could call "friends" were Dementia and Lady Anastasia.

So, I asked Sir Aether to invite her and Andros.

It had been so busy that I wouldn't find time to go out at all. I wanted to visit mother. Even though it was a fake engagement, I wanted her to know about this big day. I'm sure she'd be happy, right?

When I told Prince Cassian about my request to let me visit her, he insisted on coming along.

"Wouldn't it be nice to introduce myself to your mother too?" he said.

I never took anyone to her grave so this would be a first. I feared taking someone there with me would expose my weaknesses. But since he wanted to go so bad I couldn't say no.

I got dressed into a rose-tinted gown and left my hair open. I was going to see her after so long it was a mixed feeling of excitement and sadness.

"Ready to go m'lady?" Prince Cassian asked as I took his hand and got into the carriage.

-

We sat on a thick carpet facing the Lake beside my mother's grave.

Prince Cassian requested we had a panic instead of just sitting on the ground.

"Do you miss your mother?" he asked when we had settled down.

"Very much." I simply said.

"Do you wish to see her?"

"Everyday."

It was weird. Him asking me about mother.

"You know...when people die they are reborn. It might not always be in the form of a human but I'm sure your mother is somewhere..."

I laughed, "You don't have to make something up to comfort me, I'm fine."

There was an awkward silence between us.

"My mother died when I was five..." I said in a low voice. I never talked about her to anyone, I didn't want to remember the painful memories.
"There had been some cookies on my desk that day, it was there out of nowhere. But I didn't think much about it. I took them in my hands and ran to the person I loved the most, my mother and like always, we feed each other out of love I stuffed her mouth with them. One moment we were laughing and having fun and then...the next moment she was choking and out of breathe. I kept asking her what was wrong and screamed for help. She died in my arms. I witnessed her warm body slowly turning cold by the time father reached to the scene. Appearenly the cookies were poisoned by a maid who was digested in jealousy and greed, but they were for me not mother and I had feed all of them to her and never took a bite."

'It wasn't your fault', everyone used to say. I knew it wasn't my fault, of course. I was just five, I couldn't possibly have known they were poisoned. But the guilt. The guilt was so heavy.

I didn't even know why I told this story which I had almost forgotten to the Prince. I just felt like it.

I looked at him. His expression surprised me.

His open lip corners and eyebrows lowered and his bright eyes were filled with sadness. He didn't say anything yet said so many words and hugged me.

He held me gently in his arms.

I hated hugs. The only thing I could remember when hugging is how my mother's body temperature lowered every second as I screamed at the top of my lungs for help.

I hated how people would say "Sorry" everytime they heard about my mom.

I hated how I missed her.

“You're fine, Rose, you're fine.” he whispered gently as he patted my head.

I felt my eyes get blurry as I sobbed in his arms.

I didn't feel uncomfortable. He was warm, just like the sun and I was broken.

It felt like the Prince knew how just heartbroken it was to lose someone you love.

I hugged him tightly and continued to sob.

Mother, if you can hear me, I'm getting engaged to this man here.