Rain Check?

~109~

Making decisions suck. They're never as simple as an adult as they were as a child.  Long gone are the easy days of just choosing which picture to color, what game to play on the playground or whether jumping out of the swing at its highest point was a good idea or not.

  The first career I ever wanted was to be a teacher. The joy of helping teach others began at a young age thanks to having an incredibly kind and caring kindergarten teacher. It was the only occupation that I kept going back to over and over again by passing other ideas like lawyer or physical therapist. 

  But when the time came to choose a college, I only focused on what their education program was like and made my choice based on that. 

  Then the time came to find my first teaching job and it fell into my lap. I'd been offered the position only three weeks into my internship, promised that as soon as the degree was in my hand I'd become a paid employee of the school I was interning for. 

  There's similarities though that come with some decisions as a child and as an adult. Sometimes, they're made for you and you have zero say in the matter at hand. Biggest example of that in my own life was the loss of my father. One day he was there, and the next day he was gone. I had no say in the matter, he definitely  had no say in the matter. It was just decided by the good Lord above that his time was up and he was gone. 

  And then there's decisions that you agree to make, only because you're slightly forced into them. That began at the beginning of my relationship with Chris. A simple invite to a Halloween part just over a year ago. One that I'd fought going to, encouraged by Sawyer who said she'd join me to only get in an accident and never show up. Even a continuation of that coming from being forced into a game of bobbing for the apple that would ultimately end in sharing our first kiss with one another.  

  Agreeing to an insane fundraiser just in order to have more resources for your students would fall into that category as well. The better decision coming from Chris when he bid on me, leaving the whole thing anonymous. Another moment in the grand scheme of decision making. Did he know then that we'd be where we are today? I highly doubt that.

  The decision to move up the wedding was a simple one to make as well. What was the point in waiting any longer? Oh, right. The hope that I'd regain full function to my leg. Pointless to wait on something that may never happen. Who cares at this point? I just want to be Mrs. Evans and say farewell to Miss Abrams.

  But now, listening to the multiple people sitting around me, I'm realizing I don't want to make any more decisions. I want to go back to a blanket fort and color in peace, not coming out until I'm called for dinner.

  "Los Angeles? Are you kidding me?" my sister asks in full bewilderment. "I can't afford that kind of plane ticket."

  Chris reaches over to the kitchen counter behind where we sit. Grabbing up multiple envelopes before he's tossing one in the direction of each person. "Merry Christmas!" he exclaims as we watch our moms, our sisters, Scott and Sawyer rip into the Christmas cards. 

  "Christopher," Lisa mutters as she looks down at the first class plane ticket in her hand. She glances around the table as each person has a similar look on their face. "I always thought you'd want a wedding here."

  "I have my reasons," he smirks as he looks over to me, gently rubbing my shoulder as his arm hangs along the back of my chair. "I don't care about a wedding here. I'm going to build a marriage here, and a life with kids. That's what I want here."

  My  heart soars at his sweet, romantic words. I lean in closer to him, my head resting against his shoulder as a hand settles on his stomach. The moment only gets better as he places a soft kiss atop my head. 

  "I imagine it's going to be a nightmare to find a hotel at Christmas," my mom thinks out loud as she begins typing into her phone. 

  "Already taken care of," I chime in, opening up the Captain America notebook that's been sitting in front of me this whole time. I begin to pull out multiple pages that have each of their information listed. "Apparently being a top, sought after actor affords a little extra pull for things in LA."

  "Okay, so I need to rethink the bachelorette party then," Sawyer announces, glancing over at Carly and Shanna.  "Time to begin researching again."

  "I don't want a bachelorette party, Sawyer." I look up at Chris, hoping for his back up on the subject but all he does is shrug and tell me that it's up to me. "Are you having a bachelor party?" I ask. 

  Chris looks over to Scott who doesn't meet my own eye contact. I clear my throat as he looks all around the room avoiding me. He finally huffs and pouts, "You demoted me! So, yes, he gets a bachelor party."

  "Before or when we get to LA?" I ask cautiously.

  "Well, since you two are heading out in two days, LA."

  The nerves I've kept in line ever since Chris returned to Boston suddenly rear their ugly head. LA has a huge party scene, one that Chris has participated in for some time. One that brings out a lot of scantily clad women and maybe even reporters who don't understand the words 'Not Interested.'

  Chris can feel the change in me, making him lean up on his elbows. "No clubs," he informs Scott whose mouth drops open. "We can go out to dinner and head back to the house. I've got a pool table. No getting drunk either."

  "That's taking it a little far, isn't it?" the younger brother presses looking between the two of us.

  "Take it or leave it, Scott."

  I lean over, resting my chin on Chris shoulder. With my  hazel eyes I look up, finding his blues returning my gaze. I whisper out a quiet, "Thank you," before nuzzling my nose against his bicep. 

  I'm suddenly thankful that even now, as an adult, for someone else making pertinent decisions that concern me. Especially when I know the person making them loves me. 

*Unedited

*Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!