Lost Love [H.S]

fifty nine

Warning: implications/mentions of miscarriage + blood

26 June 2021

My eyes feel heavy as I peel them open. A headache pounding through my brain.

My body feels heavy, reaching over to the bedside table to find my phone while I try to figure out why I'm laid out across the end of the bed instead of tucked up with Addie.

I feel like I've been asleep for months.

Taking a few deep breaths to calm my headache, pressing the button to switch it on and seeing no notifications which is weird because I normally wake up with loads and it's already 9 in the morning.

The girls are normally in here around seven, jumping all over us, full of energy despite the time.

Confused, I climb out of bed and head towards the door to go and find the girls. To my surprise Posie and Capri are curled up together, fast asleep in bed.

Where's Addie?

I head over to the girls, sitting down on the edge of the bed and reaching to move Capri's messy curls out of her face which makes her begin to wake up.

"Good morning, Angel girl." I whisper down to her, she's still a little disoriented for a few seconds before she looks up at me with a frown on her face.

"Mumma home?" She whispers back to me, looking up at me tiredly but also extremely confused.

Then all the memories of last night flood back to me at once.

Addie left.

She hasn't come home.

I shake my head, "she'll be home soon though. Why don't you get some more sleep?" I suggest softly, seeing her yawn as she nods her little head. I lean over and kiss her temple, "I love you."

"Mmm, love you daddy." She hums back, eyes shutting as she cuddles back into Posie's embrace.

I need to sort my shit out, it was selfish of me to pick a fight with Addie last night when she was already struggling. She was in pain and had been irritable which obviously meant the whole thing escalated instantly.

She told me that she didn't want to have that conversation when she wasn't feeling great, that's a valid reason because it's actually something we need to discuss eventually just not when she's not in the right state of mind.

It wasn't fair to put her in that position that then resulted in her leaving to get away from the situation. She was probably overwhelmed as well as being in pain and I just added a ton of shit on top of all that.

My question was a valid one, I would've thought that Posie's emergency contacts with school would've included me but then again Posie hasn't been in school much this year so it wasn't exactly necessary.