Lost Love [H.S]

eleven

17 October 2020

I haven't been to sleep yet.

Addie is flat out beside me but I can't bring myself to shut my eyes.

I'm desperately trying to savour every second I get to lay in bed with her, tracing my eyes down the side of her face to really truly take her in.

She looks so peaceful, lips pouted out and hair sprawled around her head like an angel's halo. I pretended to fall asleep until she was, it wasn't long before she shuffled across the mattress and curled up in my arms.

One of her arms is thrown over my waist while the other remains sandwiched under her cheek while she sleeps. My arm is over her to keep her close to me while I keep a protective watch over her.

There's a part of my brain that I have been fighting while I've been led here, it keeps telling me to go and check on the girls. I don't know why but I'm so worried about them. I keep reminding myself that Addie has been a mother for four years now, she knows what she's doing but I'm so new to this.

I don't really know how to be a dad but I'm going to try my hardest to be one for those little girls, they are the sweetest little things and they both deserve the entire world.

I'm going to give those girls the entire world.

My fingers trace gently over Addie's back, watching her move slightly to snuggle her face further into her own palm. Smiling, I lean forward and press my lips against her forehead.

I rest my chin against her forehead, feeling her snuggle into my chest when she feels my body closer to hers than it was a second ago.

The room is completely silent, only Addie's extremely soft breathing being heard so when the door creaks ever so quietly I perk up.

My hold around Addie loosens when I hear little sniffles fill the quiet room, my eyes have already adjusted to the dark room so when I look over towards the door my eyes land on Capri.

"Hey Angel." I whisper, my heart in pieces as she desperately clutches her pig teddy in her tiny arms.

"Daddy?"

The sound of her calling me her dad makes me pause, my breathing faltering in the happiest way. My lips part as she walks slowly around the bed to my side which makes me roll to face her, "why are you crying, Angel?"

She sniffles, reaching her arms out to me and I happily lift her up onto the bed and sit her in my lap.

I'm surprised Addie hasn't woken up but Capri doesn't seem to mind that I'm the one comforting her when she snuggles into my chest and wraps her little arms around me.

"Scary dream." She tells me, words slightly jumbled from her little lisp as she hides her face in my bare chest.

My hands rub up and down her back, placing a kiss to the top of her head. "Oh, you did? I'm sorry Angel." I feel bad that she had a nightmare, Addie used to always have nightmares especially towards the beginning of our relationship.