Freak Like Me - Katya Zamo

Part Seventeen: Who To Blame

2 month skip

The moment Brian left you that day, it seemed like he took a piece of you with him and left a void. The first couple of days were pretty bad, your friends took rounds to stay with you. Physically, you were much better, besides the nausea that wasn't as strong as before but it still was present. At first, you didn't feel like doing anything, not even eating, but you couldn't starve yourself anymore and you were very aware of the fact that you had to take good care of yourself, even if you had to get scolded by your friends in the process. They were fundamental to your healing process, and even though you weren't quite there yet, at least you were able to leave the house and go back to work.

Which, speaking of, you considered many times quitting. What still kept you connected to Brian was Trixie and what kept you connected to Trixie was Trixie Cosmetics. It was really hard, you really didn't want to cut her out of your life, she'd become one of your best friends and it sucked to have to act differently with her, not really because you wanted to, but because the situation required it to be this way. You still talked, of course, but only the necessary, and occasionally you'd asked her about Brian, knowing that he would do the same. After thinking about it, a lot, you decided to stay. You knew it was gonna be hard but you weren't quite ready to cut these people out of your life just yet.

However, you'd regret this decision quicker than you expected as the next collection you'd work on would be a collab between Trixie and Katya, the olympic one. The timing of things between you and Brian really sucked, probably since the beginning.

The last time you'd talked to him was about a week after your breakup to update him about how you were doing and if you'd decided what you were gonna do about your... situation. You hadn't decided yet and that made you and Brian completely lose contact. Well, that was until you had a meeting at the office to discuss the collab. You couldn't put to words how tense the room felt, but thankfully, the only ones that really knew what was going on were you, Brian and Trixie. You tried to be as professional as you could about it and you think Brian managed it quite well too, but he still couldn't help himself and look at you when no one was paying attention and you couldn't help yourself either, constantly averting your gaze to the man you were once hopelessly in love with and, as much as you hated to admit, you knew you still were.

"Ok so, the names I picked are: Warmup, Rigged, Laid out, Chalk it up, Shaposhnikova, Underscored, Flip flop, Yurchenko, Dismount, Plank, Amplitude and, of course, GOAT" Brian said enthusiastically, you couldn't help but smile at him, all the names screamed Katya and you loved every bit of it.

"Goat? Okay, diva" Everyone laughed at Trixie's confusion, she really had no idea what it meant.

"Greatest of all time you dumb bitch" Brian answered, incredulous.

"Okay okay, who am I to invite you to do a collab and not trust your artistic process? Miss Goat" Trixie said, holding her hands up.

"What do you think, Miss (Y/ L/ N)?" Brian turns to you, giving you a smug smile but you could tell he seemed a little unsure about this interaction and your reaction to it. Everyone turns to look at you and you instantly freeze, you could see some of your coworkers smiling. You had never explicitly talked about the nature of your relationship with Brian but you were certain they knew about it, well, most of it. If they knew that at that very moment, you had broken up with Brian, were carrying his baby and hadn't seen him in 2 months, their expressions would be very different.

"I love it, Katya. It's definitely on brand, very much like Trixie now, giving blonde bimbo" You teased Trixie, attempting to move the spotlight to her instead of you and Brian. It worked and after Trixie playfully flip you off, they started talking about prices and everything. Brian took advantage of it and discreetly turned to you.