Shameless (Jalex Fanfic)

Chapter 1: Never Tell A Soul

Alex POV:

It was a quiet night in the tour bus, everyone was asleep as far as I could tell. We'd had a kind of crazy show, and after party. I should've fallen asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow like Jack and the others but I didn't. My mind wouldn't turn off and my alcohol scrambled brain lead my thoughts somewhere I didn't want them to go.

I'd been thinking these things for a while, although whenever it popped in my head I tried as best I could to push them out. As hard as it was, it worked most of the time, but the other part of the time when it was quiet and nothing was there to distract me these thoughts managed to creep their way back in.

Jack and I had known each other since I moved from Essex, he was my first friend, my best friend. I never thought of him in any way but friends, that is, until recently. I've been looking at him for years but now, when I see him I see something different.

When I had a fight with my girlfriend right before the tour started Jack was with me every minute. Lisa had threatened to break up with me because I was away on tour too much. We'd had a monumental fight about it right before I left. As far as I knew we were over. She said, if I left we were done. But I couldn't not go.

She didn't say we were completely over but she hadn't talked to me since I left so I just assumed...

I was really torn up about it. I didn't talk to anyone for at least a week, apart from the shows. Jack didn't try make me talk like I thought he would.

I was sitting in the back lounge of the tour bus one day and he just came back and sat with me in silence. I looked over at Jack and he gave me a sad smile. I never looked at him the same after that.

He didn't force me to talk or be happier. He was just there for me, and that's what I needed in that moment.

That's what started these thoughts in my head. The more I tried to not think about it the more I did. Whenever I looked at him, whenever I could hear him playing his guitar, whenever he smiled at me I just... didn't know what to do.

I was bi and as far as I knew Jack was too. We'd watched each other have boyfriends and girlfriends but we'd never looked at each other like that. I'd never even had a thought like that towards Jack. I don't know I just hadn't. I just couldn't understand why was it happening now.

I laid there in the quiet tour bus that night, finally allowing the thoughts to fill my mind. Jack Barakat was my best friend, but did I want it to stay that way? When I thought of him my heart beat out of my chest. This wasn't normal for best friends. I loved hearing him talk to me, his voice was like music to my ears. That's not normal for best friends...

It was dark and I was tired of the quiet. I tried plugging my earbuds into my ears and turning on some music but that only made me even more anxious so I quickly turned it off and placed my phone in the bunk beside me.

I layed my head back against the pillow again. No one moved, no one snored, which was odd because Zack usually snored like a bitch.

"Anyone awake?" I asked quietly finally tired of the silence.

"Jack?" I sighed and whispered, "Jack are you awake?"

No response. No shuffling in bed.

"Jack," I said almost inaudible, "I love you..."

I closed my eyes. My mind stopped racing, my heart stopped jumping out of my chest and I was drifting in minutes. I could've sworn I heard something coming from across the bus but I was too far gone.

--

I was the last to wake up, or really be woken up. I felt someone shake my shoulder a little but I just rolled over and told him to fuck off, covering my head with a pillow. He walked off and came back in what felt like a few seconds, this time shaking me with more force.

"Hey dude, get up. If I can drink twice as much as you and be up on time then you can get your ass up now." Jack.

I rolled over towards him, but I didn't think it through because I almost fell off the damn bed. Jack put his hand up and caught me by my hip, making my heart skip a beat. He laughed as I threw my head back against the pillow, now wide awake.

"What are we even doing today?" I turned my head to look at him, his dark brown and blond hair was already done for the day. He wore black skinnies and a gray JAGK shirt.

"Sound check, duh," he said punching me in the arm, "Get your ass up."

I groaned and pulled my blanket up over my head. Ten minutes later after thoroughly checking all the apps on my phone I finally hopped out of bed. I made my way to the cramped shower in the tour bus. When I got out I blow dried and straightened my hair quickly.

I put on some skinnies and an atl shirt. It's cool to wear your own merch right? After that I scrolled through my twitter feed again and made my way off the bus. Jack was out there fucking around with Zack's skateboard, making an ass of himself. I laughed as Jack tried to do a trick.

"Shut up, Gaskarth," he pointed at me after recovering, "You can't do any better."

"Never claimed to," I replied, "I thought I had to get up? Is this all we're doing?"

"Rehearsals aren't until 4," Zack said watching Jack on his board.

"WOW," I said, "It's freaking noon. Jack, why the fuck would you wake me up?"

He smiled at me sarcastically, "Maybe I just like seeing your face bright and early in the morning."

I rolled my eyes, "Yeah sure."

"Don't you love me Alex?" he smiled more. My heart stopped for half a second. Had he...? No... he couldn't have. He skated over to me, "Well?"

I laughed nervously, "Oh yeah, sure thing man."

"I knew it!" Jack yelled and skated away from me. I sat down on the curb and took in a breath. Damn.

"You alright there buddy?" Zack asked laughing at me, I'd forgotten he was there.

"Heh, yeah. I'm good," I said nervously as Zack got back into the bus. Get it together Gaskarth. They're gonna know something's up.

My thoughts were interrupted by Jack riding up full speed and screeching to a halt. Try as he might, he flew off the board and right onto me. I groaned in pain as the wind was knocked out of me. I thought Jack would just get off me but he didn't. He stayed on me laughing and crushing my rib cage.

"Jaaaack!" I whined beneath him, "Get off!"

"Suck my ass, Alex," he said still on top of me, enjoying my winded voice.

Honestly, I didn't mind it as much as I let on, "Jack!"

He stopped squirming and eventually we were just staring at each other. His chocolate brown eyes looked into mine with a glimmer I'd never seen from him before. He licked his bottom lip and looked at mine. What was he doing? His head began to incline towards mine.

My heart started to pound rapidly. Was this really happening?

He stopped right before our lips touched, looking into my eyes again. His voice was soft and quiet. I could feel his minty breath on my lips as he whispered my name, "Alex?"

"Yeah?" I whispered back.

He closed his eyes and took in a breath bringing his head away a little, "Uh, nothing. Nevermind..." He started to get off me. I didn't know what the hell that was. Did Jack feel the same about me as I did him?

I sighed as he got up and held a hand out to help me stand up.

"Thanks," I mumbled.

"Yeah," he said under his breath. He opened the bus door and looked back at me once more before hopping onto the bus, leaving me again, alone with my thoughts.

A/N: This is the beginning :) You all ready?

Vote and comment if you like :)

Until next time,

-H