The Fourth Horseman

A Woman Scorned

I wound up moving around the country with Ethan. He took me everywhere with him. I was pretty much glued to his side since that day at my house when I learned Jay was gone. It had been 4 months and I was well on my way of showing I was pregnant. No doubt about it now. I hadn't heard a single word from Jay. He had become a ghost. He rarely ever checked in with Ethan and when he did he refused to speak with me. Ethan made excuses for him saying it was just too hard but I knew otherwise. He had obviously moved on, growing tired of me like every other woman in his life. I had only a short time with Jay but his memory would be lasting. I would never forget him and most likely never forgive him.

Ethan wanted me in more ways than one, and one day I just might give in to his desires, but that time was not in my near future. He was a gentleman and understood my perspective. I had to give Ethan credit, he was a damn fine man, one that would make any woman proud. I was proud to have him as one of my makers, and would be loyal to him till the day I died. Loyal, but never in love. I didn't want to love anyone else. I made sure to harden my heart. It was easy. It had already solidified into something like a fossil in my chest. Only a memory of what used to function in the cavity.

Ethan and I had made a habit of sleeping in the same bedroom when we slept or just wanted to rest. We would talk all night and I learned alot about him in those hours spent talking. He had many stories to tell and they helped to take my mind into far off distant lands filled with bloody battles and smart tactics. We also talked about the baby who was moving around alot. By the 5th month I looked more like seven and he said most likely the pregnancy would progress at a faster pace.

This made me nervous because I suspected a normal gestational period but again I was wrong. Looks like our baby would be here sooner than I thought. Ethan let me pick which house to live in out of the many he owned. I still missed my mountains so I opted for a nice house in Colorado. It wasn't my Appalachian range but it would do. The two story house was wonderful with a large wrap around covered porch and over two hundred acres. It was private, but Ethan had alot of visitors. Old acquaintances and friend would stop in for a few days to catch up. It was nice and about as close to normal as I could get. He would bring me blood to drink and I would often feed directly from him. As I got bigger it was not harder to hunt but Ethan considered it the safest option.

We grew to need each other for different reasons. I would offer my opinion on strategy and he said I had the right mind for it and asked if I would want to become a general of sorts in war times, if it ever came to that. I humbly accepted the position. I was hungry to kill. I wanted to take my anger and frustration out and my vampire mind determined that was the correct outlet for it. I could see a future for myself by Ethans side. He wanted me around and I wanted to be with him. He had become my best friend. I fell out of touch with Georgia. Thats life thought and it happens.

I thought more about Jay as I got closer to delivery, wondering if he would make an appearance when the time came. I was sadly disappointed. The baby was born on a misty morning in late spring. The fresh green leaves were just starting to spread out of their buds and the cold chill of winter was only present during the long nights. It was a boy. He looked just like Jay but could pass as Ethans baby as well. The delivery was easy, no problems and I was only in labor for a few hours. I guessed it was my vampire body healing as fast as damage was created.

I held the tiny infant in my arms as a proud Ethan looked on. I passed the sweet babe off to Ethan to hold for awhile in order for me to take some moments alone. I had no name picked out. This moment of my son coming into the world without his father to see him will be etched in my mind forever. In that moment I hated Jay. I hated him for what he took away from his son. He would not know his father, and I would make sure everyone would never know the real truth of his paternity.

I had become a woman scorned, unable to overcome the hate in my heart for the man who once held it so close. I couldn't think of a name for my son, and sadly I began to distance myself from him as well. It was not his fault. It was mine. I was the one who was not careful, who fell for a shit excuse of a man, then bore his child. I was no better than Jay. He had run out on us without a look back. I was still present but just as disconnected. If Jay was a shit excuse for a dad, I was an even worse mother.

A few days later I picked my sorry ass up out of the bed with a change of heart. I needed to let Jay go. I needed to move on. I had a beautiful son and a wonderful man that cared about me. I had many gifts in front of me but was too stubborn and prideful to be grateful. I couldn't take another step in the direction I was headed. I needed to let that door close. That chapter of my life was finished. It was time to move on. I walked into the nursery to see Ethan holding our son. He smiled when I entered and I walked right up to him and kissed him right on the lips. A deep, open kiss that said way more than hello or good morning.

He looked up at me and smiled and I smiled back and winked at him.