BLOODIED MEMORIES PART 1 [KAZ BREKKER]

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Warnings: mentions of death

A/N: This is more from Kaz's POV so I felt like third person POV would work the best in this. So it's written like "Y/N did this and that" instead of "you did this and that". Also spoilers for Crooked Kingdom, but the ending hasn't happened, nobody has died, nobody has left anywhere etc.

Word count: 2.8k

There were a lot of things people didn't know about Kaz Brekker, and one of them was a secret he had tried to bury with Jordie and Kaz Rietveld.

Kaz Rietveld had had a little sister, Y/N. When Kaz Brekker's past self drowned, Y/N was left alone in the world. Y/N had kicked herself to the shore as well, and they had tried to survive together, but the person who he had become after the Barge scared her. He was thirsty for revenge, and after figuring out who Jakob Hertzoon actually was, he wanted to join a gang, where Y/N wanted to move to the countryside and give up with paying back to Pekka Rollins. Kaz had called his sister weak, selfish, and naive—and walked away from her, made her lost him into the crowd. She was screaming, crying after him, but Kaz had just continued walking, shutting her cries from his mind. He couldn't have a weak sister with him if he wanted to pursue revenge.

That evening, Kaz regretted what he had done and tried to find Y/N, but she was nowhere to be found. Then it started to look like maybe she'd been robbed, killed and drowned in the Barge too... there were rumors about an unidentified girl being found by the shore. Kaz swallowed the news without a single tear, deciding he shouldn't dwell in them, but he'd have revenge for Y/N and Jordie. That thought fueled his will to push forward, and the next day, he went to Per Haskell and asked if he had the need for another soldier.

Seven years had passed from that moment, and Kaz was an adult now. He had gotten revenge on Pekka Rollins, he was the leader of the Dregs and was known as a legend around the city, a feared legend, but the King of the Barrel nonetheless, sitting on a pile of kruge, knowing nobody would dare cross him unless they were idiots.

He had even gotten friends. He didn't call them his friends, but deep down he knew he cared about them more than he cared about other people. He had even fallen in love with his Wraith, Inej, and Jesper had grown as close to him as Jordie had been. He might not want to admit it, but he needed people in his life. Even if you liked having no ties, things got messy when your heart gave a damn.

Today, Kaz and Jesper were down at the market, every shopkeeper ready to serve Dirtyhands if he needed anything.

Jesper sighed, eyeing the line of homemade food stands. "I didn't eat breakfast this morning, all this food makes me hungry."

"Then get something to go," said Kaz.

"As if I had any money."

Kaz groaned and reached into his coat pocket and pulled out a few coins. He pushed them into his friend's hand. "Go buy some food, for fuck's sake."

Jesper grinned. "It's nice to be appreciated."

Kaz rolled his eyes, waiting for Jesper as he strolled to one of the stalls, picking up hot buns stuffed with fried chicken and slathered in spicy sauce. He came back, munching it away happily and Kaz sighed, continuing to walk forward.

They didn't walk for long before they were stopped by a girl, around the age of what Y/N would have been now - which was what, sixteen? Kaz swallowed at the sight of her, actually she looked just like Y/N would have looked like.

She looked at the two men, fiddling with her fingers for a moment. "Um, excuse me, but do you know anyone called Kaz Rietveld?" she asked, looking between them hopefully.

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