Deviant

Twenty six

" I... Didn't know..." Jungkook placed his hand on my head and ran his fingers through my hair. He did it slowly as if thinking about something. I closed my eyes and continued.

"I always considered myself as strong as a rock. But each time you were near, I could lose myself so easily. The confidence I had in me slowly started to shatter, I craved for you yet I struggled to keep you at a distance. I was both afraid of the unknown and to let myself get carried away. I wanted to jump into your arms from the first moment you touched me but my stupid vanity did not let me. I guess I needed to feel safe. To see you fight a little for me just so my heart could feel at ease, and I would have chased you to the end of the world."

"I always wanted to be like you. It's so easy for you to show your feelings. And so hard for me to do so."

"Yeah... I guess you know better than me. I don't have a mirror in my face so I could tell what expression I make." He rolled me over, propped himself up on his elbow, and looked down at me."So... Tell me. If I am that easy to read. What is my expression telling you now?"

Flashing me a confident grin, he let his gaze roll over my naked body, lingering on my breasts. I saw the appreciative glow in his gaze and something curled around inside my stomach. He looked up meeting my eyes. His gaze pierced my soul, sending chills up my spine. There I could see desire and adoration.

"And..." His lips touched my ear, "I prefer melting an ice queen rather than wasting my time with an obedient and boring little girl. It's... more exciting and it never gets boring." He pulled back and looked at me as the corner of his lips curled upward in a devilish smirk.

"Many times I tried to read you and many times I failed in understanding you. But I guess that this is one of the qualities I fell for. Maybe sometimes I was pissed by your indifference but I will never get tired of trying to approach you, just like you don't get tired to do it in your own way. Maybe I can't always read what is crossing your mind or what in reality you feel under that mask you stubbornly raise between you and the rest of the world. But every time you're looking at me... at that moment you can't hide anymore. Even more when I am touching you." He bit his lower lip as he ran his fingers over my throat, gently, barely felt.

Desire washed over me, my blood pumping, sending small shudders through my body. And he smiled.

Maybe it wasn't that hard for him to understand my feelings. Maybe he needed just a little confidence.

I closed my eyes and arched my body up towards him. I moaned at the feel of his chest pressed against my breasts. Hard and solid. I let my palms drift up his back feeling the plane of his muscles and I bit another moan as I continued to trace the lines of his back and feel his muscles shift with his every breath.

I opened my eyes to see him still staring down at me with a sexy smirk on his lips. "I guess you really can't get enough of touching me, right?"

I blushed. I guess I will never do. I love touching you.

I don't know what he saw on my face but his eyes softened. I watched him bite his lower lip, white teeth pressing into red flesh and I could not tear my gaze away from his mouth and that tiny sweet mole from under his lower lip. I would kiss it endlessly.

I needed him to touch me right then and there. My stomach clenched, desire washed over me.

He cupped my breasts and lightly caressed each nipple. I moaned, a deep chill flowing through my body. I looked into his eyes and the way he was looking at me, with so much tenderness and love, made me tear up.

I wanted to hope for a future together.

To hope that one day... He will take my hand and promise me that it will be only me.