Deviant

nine

~ No promises ~

Y/N?  I am really worried over here." Mingyu was heard on the other side of the door.

"Leave me alone... Please. I just need a moment. " You raised your voice for Mingyu to hear you. After what happened with Jungkook, you came into the guest room and locked yourself inside.

"It's 1 pm, Y/N. How long are you gonna stay locked in there? Talk to me. Did Jungkook do something? "

You curled up under the blanket like a lost puppy.

"He... doesn't care... " You whispered more to yourself. Of course, Mingyu couldn't hear you.

Flashback

"I only use them for a while. I don't feel anything towards them.
But it's different when it comes to you. If you accept someone, it's because you have feelings for them. "

End of flashback

After he had said that, I was confused.  The way he talked was like he was still doing it with people just like at the prison. I had my doubts and had to ask him if, after all, he did sleep with Jennie. I was afraid that he actually lied to me. But his silence cleared everything up. He had indeed lied.

And how should I take that, Jungkook? That it's ok? That you can fuck whoever you want and then come to me, and why not, do the same thing to me as well? What the fuck is wrong with you? You really don't care how I would feel? You don't care about my feelings? Because you know damn well how I feel about you. If you don't, then you are an idiot.

How can you say those sweet things to me? How can you touch me like that after you did it with that girl?
How can you hurt me in this manner? Didn't you think about me at all?

I thought you cared a little. Was I wrong?

A key was heard and in no time the door opened.
You protested in a weak voice before pulling the blanket over your head.

"What did he do? "
Mingyu asked you gently as he placed himself on the bed, close to you.

"I am just tired of trying to understand him. I promised that I will always be there for him. I promised that I will protect him and love him unconditionally. 
Then he left, and I understood. I was perfectly fine with other girls as well.
But why is he lying to me? Why is he so sweet and warm with me? Why give me hope if he continues to sleep with anyone who comes in his way?
Am I the same for him? Does he see me as he sees them? Another one who he wants to have sex with?"

"... "

"He should have been honest. I had to deal with both of his sides. I know them so well. Their fears, their weakness, their flaws. I would have understood. But why deceive me? Why pretend? I thought he really cared about me a little. Or was it just me being naive? "

"Was it Jennie? " Mingyu asked, you could feel how his body tensed up next to you.

"..."

"So, it was her... I am so sorry, Y/N. My sister needed help with her daughter. She only has me here in Seoul and she needed to stay somewhere and continue her studies...
And I hoped that somehow it will be good for Jungkook's condition to have someone close to his age around him. I never thought something like this would happen. I never thought of Jennie... "

"It's not your fault. Please... You don't have to explain nor excuse yourself. You can bring whoever you want to your own house. Besides, now I can see how he is acting around people. Now I can finally understand... What I am to him. "