Deviant

twenty four

I moved backward to give more space between us so I could look into his eyes. And when I caught his gaze I could see, the intensity of his desire. He wanted me as much as I wanted him. And not only. He trusted me. The only thing I was praying for was for this to last.

But I still had to make sure he had no doubts regarding us and my feelings. "What had happened there, at the club, it happened with a reason. Mingyu knew that I will go there and he supported me with that. Trust me, I had no other choice. Those guys know about us and I had to make sure that they will keep it to themselves. You know that I am willing to do everything there's needed to make sure you're safe. I will not risk anything when it comes to your safety. Not when I have something to say about that."

"I know." Jungkook smiled warmly, a definite softness entered his eyes as he gazed down at me, his fingers tracing my cheek gently. "But sometimes I wish you would think more about yourself. I don't like seeing you exposing yourself like that."

"I can't help it. I hate it when people are fast in judging you. I hate how they think low of you. They know nothing. They don't know you and how hard life was with you. They should try to give people the benefit of the doubt because things are not always as they appear. We don't really know someone until we really get close to them. It hurts because you are much more than they think.

"I don't really care Y/N, about them and their opinion." The same warm smile was still there but I could see beyond it.

"You're lying. We all want to feel included and welcomed. Anyone would feel hurt in your place. So don't try to act strongly in front of me because it's not the case. Don't hide your feelings from me. Let me be your shoulder to cry on. Never be ashamed to show your weakness and vulnerability in front of me."

"All I need is you Y/N." His eyes were serious as never before as they looked into mine. "Your feelings and your opinion are all I care about. After all, you are my home where I want to return to each time. No one else."

My eyes widened. His words left me breathless. My brain instantly had shut down. I didn't know that he was feeling that way. How would someone take such confessions? I felt overwhelmed.

"You are my first and only home. That's why I keep telling you that if you ever disappear then there will be nothing left for me to return to."

And I burst into tears right then and there. My heart broke. From happiness but also sadness. I felt both bad and ashamed that he had to see me like this. As much as I struggled to hide my tears by wiping them away, new ones were still coming out without my permission. And I cursed in my mind for that.

"That is why, if they touch you, if they hurt you in some way, I will kill them without any remorse. You are everything I have always had. Everything I didn't even dare to dream or hoped for. Even now I can't believe that I have someone who actually loves me and wants me. Every day I am waiting to wake up and for this dream to come to an end."

Without knowing how it happened we were already kissing. First soft and gentle, barely touching each other's lips, then deep and intense. His kisses were like a drug. He was like a drug and so addicting.

I lifted myself on my toes and encircled my arms around his neck and hugged his head tightly needing him as close as possible. His mouth went down to tease my neck, running his tongue on my sensitive areas and I was already panting with need. My heart hammered really fast, his hand touching my breast, kneading it roughly as he touched the sensitive area behind my ear with his tongue.