Before You | 18+ | ✓

16: jj

Trying to keep my hands off of her is so damn hard, but I'm fighting every urge I have to take her into my arms and kiss her the way I desperately want to. I don't want to scare her when I kinda sorta just got her back.

Is it weird for me to still be in love with her?

Probably.

But that doesn't change the fact that I am.

There's also the matter of fucking Trent. I'm honestly shocked that I haven't hit him. The shit he says about Marley makes my blood boil to a dangerous temperature. Like today at practice when he was comparing how his ex's blowjobs compare to the girl he was with last weekend. Coincidentally, the same time I was over there baking cookies with her like a goddamn puppy craving any scraps she'll throw my way.

I've spent at least some form of time with her every day since she started talking to me again two and a half weeks ago. Even with all that time together, we still talk on the phone until one of us falls asleep.

It's lead to more than a few spikes of fear when I wake up with my phone battery drained because I fell asleep that night before I could plug it in. I can't miss a call from Bailey and it worries me how careless I'm being with the only lifeline I have to him. The only one that we all have with him.

The October breeze is a better change in pace than August and September where the heat is blistering underneath all the pads I have to wear.

I'm drained from practice, but I still have a meet up with Bria later where we're running intervals instead of for distance and I think it's her way of trying to kill me.

I pull my phone out of my pocket and press my mom's contact, dialing her number. I almost think she's not going to pick up, but then she does. "How nice of you to call. How is my sweet California boy doing?" She greets, teasing me immediately.

"Oh Mom, you know I'm still a Carolina boy at heart. Sorry I haven't called much this week, there's just been a lot going on with football." It's a weak excuse, but it's hard for me to talk to my family when I know how far away they are. It was my decision to come here, but I miss them.

She laughs softly, "You don't have to explain that to me. I know how it is better than anyone." Mom pauses before continuing and I shift my bag on my shoulder, opting to walk to the house instead of catch a ride. "A little birdie told me that it's not football consuming so much of your time, but I'll let it slide until you want to talk about it."

I'm going to kill Mira.

She's been in such a sappy mood since she and Henry got engaged. I kept her secret about being in love with Henry for years and she can't keep it quiet for more than two months?

Clearly I'm the superior sibling.

"Oh is this birdie newly engaged and a major pain in my ass?"

"Potentially. I would also like to say she's also a major pain in my ass."

I smile widely, "Oh really?"

"You are all major pains in my ass. Don't think that you're an exception." Mom says and I can't help but laugh.

"Right, okay, but I'm the least major pain in your ass."

"That is an awfully high presumption of you to make, JJ." Mom says. "So am I going to have to wait for news from tabloids about this girl like I did with Henry and Mira?"

I freeze at the thought of cameras capturing pictures of me and Marley. I thrive in the spotlight when it comes to football, but I've seen firsthand how invasive the media can be when it comes to getting the money shots they crave. It's the reason why there's naked photos of my sister on the internet forever.