Evermore - jaylor story (peace book 2)

She needs her mommy

-joes pov- 

It's been a week and Taylor doesn't leave our room at all. The only time she leaves the bed is to go to the bathroom but that's it. She doesn't eat, doesn't drink and don't talk. I don't know what to do here, I've never seen her like this. I want to help her, but it seems that anything I do is wrong, but I don't feel like I can stop trying either. I can't let her slip into this dark place and not help her get out of it. 

Today I've been making phone calls because I'm supposed to leave for a new movie soon but I'm going to drop out. I can't leave Taylor at home when this is going on. Even if she won't admit it eventually she is going to come out of that room and I need to be here for that, and I need to be here for Ellie. 

Ellie is a chapter in her own right. Because she really misses her mom and whines for her a lot. "I want mommy" she cries into my chest as I gently rock her to try and sooth the meltdown that have just gone down. She gets upset about something and then it turns into a crying fit about how much she wants Taylor. "i know baby, I know. Mommy is still feeling icky, but she will get better. But until then daddy is here" I kiss her head and try to offer any type of comfort I can but it's hard. I don't want to promise her something I can't keep so I can't promise her when her mom will come out of her room again. 

Eventually she goes down for a nap and I know that I need to talk to Taylor, well these days I talk at her more than it's a two-way conversation, but this can't keep going like this. So, I take a deep breath and go into our bedroom. "Ellie is down for a nap, but we need to talk Taylor" I try to say gently but she gives no response. 

"I love you, and I don't want to sound insensitive because you know I'm not. But this isn't okay anymore. You need to drink and oyu need to eat, I can't watch this go on anymore. We both know what that's doing to you, you need fuel. And your daughter needs you and I don't know what to tell her anymore. She is constantly crying about how she wants you, but I can't tell her when she gets to see you again." I sit down in the bed beside her. "you won't heal by laying in here all day all alone and torturing yourself. I'm here, Ellie is here, but you need to put in some effort too." 

I let her have her space and to my surprise she actually turns towards me, and I can see her puffy eyes that look like a fragile verson of herself "do you really think that that's what it is? That I'm not trying? I'm trying to survive joe. I want to dissolve into nothing, I can't take this. I killed our baby, it's my fault" she says with a cracked voice, and I've never heard her like this before. 

Gently I take her hand "oh Taylor, of course I can see you're trying to hold on. I know you and I know that. But this isn't working for you, Ellie or me, it's only making matters worse for you. If you really feel like this, we need to get you some help love. If you don't want to talk to me you need to talk to someone, absolutely anyone. And you need to eat, I can't stand here and watch you starve yourself to death, I won't allow that. And you did not kill our baby, you did no such thing." I say to try to comfort her but also put my foot down, this can't continues. 

Then it happens, she breaks down in tears and her body is shaking so I pull her into my arms after laying down on the bed next to her "i'm here Taylor. You're not alone, I promise you. We will figure this out together, but you need to communicate okay love. I will walk to the ends of the earth for you, but you got to talk to me and let me help you." I say and kiss the side of his face. 

"Mommy" a soft voice calls from the door, its Ellie. "aren't you napping Ellie?" I tell her but she comes with her stuffed ballerina plushy to the bed and I can see she has been crying too. 

-taylors pov- 

"mommy" she says again, and I know that I can't stay like this with her, so I turn around and dry my own tears before lifting her into the bed too and laying her down between us. "what's wrong beautiful girl. Why aren't you sleeping?"