TW torture, sadness, and more sadness
He lay there with his thoughts, crying until sleep took him too.
3rd Person POV (Bucky)
He hadn't seen her look so alive in a while, maybe in forever. Sure, she still had the hollow empty look in her eyes, but the smile on her face was beautiful and genuine no matter how small it was.
As he looked at her smile, that sinking feeling rose in him again. Seeing his smile fall, Alexandrya walked over to him.
"What's wrong Bucky?" She grew more concerned when he didn't respond, he just looked away. He knew his worries were stupid. She shouldn't bother herself with them.
"Bucky?" She tried again. "Please talk to me. What's wrong?"
"It's nothing." He hated the way his voice broke. He hated the tears that fell, betraying his emotions.
"It obviously isn't nothing if it's making you sad." She just wanted to help.
"I SAID IT'S NOTHING! JUST LEAVE IT ALONE!" He yelled. She shrunk back, startled. That movement broke him.
Fuck. Why would I do that? She hates me now. Shit shit shit. I just keep messing up.
Burying his head in his hands, he let the tears fall.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled. I'm so sorry." He apologized over and over. He jumped a little when he felt her hand on his knee.
"It's okay, Bucky. I'm not mad. You just startled me is all. I shouldn't have pushed. I should have dropped it. If you don't want to talk about it, we don't have to."
He wrapped his arms around her and cried onto her shoulder while she just held him, running a hand through his hair. She let him cry there for however long he needed.
"Please don't forget me. Please don't leave me. I need you." She was taken back by his words. Lifting his chin to meet his eyes, she said
"I'd never leave you. Do you hear me? I promise you. And I'm the Goddess of Promises. You can be sure I won't break it." Her words only seemed to make him cry harder. Holding her closer, he cried into her shoulder until there were no more tears left.
"Bucky,"
"Hmmm?"
"Can I ask where that thought came from?" He hesitated but answered
"Last night, you told me about Loki. I really am happy for you. I'm just worried that he'll find a way to help you escape and I'll be alone."
She opened her mouth to speak but was interrupted by the door opening. Two guards walked in and took her out of the cell. Two more guards came in and took Bucky to the room he hated the most. He was wiped and sent out on a mission.
~~Time Skip 5 years~~
1st Person POV (Bucky)
It's been five years now. Alexandrya has been improving her dreamwalking. She's spoken to both Loki and Thor. One time, all three of us met. Seeing the three together brought a smile to my face, one that hasn't been there in years. They're very nice people, sorry gods. They both accepted me when I told them I was gay. It was really nice to put faces to their names. It's nice to see that they know me as Bucky, not as The Winter Soldier.
The Winter Soldier is HYDRA'S greatest weapon. Even better than The Shadow Assassin. Now she's in his shadow, ironic right? But that means they've been harder on Alexandrya. I can't count the number of times she's come back to the cell beaten and bloody. She's always so close to passing out, yet she still heals my mind every time. I wish she'd save her energy to heal herself. I wish I could stop what they're doing to her. I've tried doing worse on missions, hoping they'll hurt me instead of her, but they just hurt us both.
We were eating the little food they gave us when the door opened. Two guards walked in and attached a chain to Alexandrya's collar. Not even giving her a chance to stand up, they dragged her out of the room. Two more guards came for me next. They took me to a room I wasn't familiar with. Leading me to a corner of the room, I waited, not knowing what they were going to do to me.
I heard footsteps and watched as Alexandrya was dragged into the room, her shirt removed. The brand on her shoulder stood out as well as the small black lines. Each line was a burn. Each line represented a witness she left. Each witness she left was a child. There were close to fifty tiny black tally marks. Fifty children left alive. She never killed children.
I watched as she was chained to a hook in the center of the room, arms above her head. The man she called Doctor walked in, whip in hand.
"You keep failing missions, Soldier. All other punishment never seems to work. So we're going to try something new." Doctor said with a smirk. I kept my face neutral, even though horror was rising in me.
"We've seen how close you guys are getting, so you will be in charge of her punishment today. I'm feeling kind today, so how about 15 lashes." His smirk turned to an evil grin. I gulped, I couldn't hurt my friend. I could see scars where she had been whipped before. I couldn't add more.
Doctor handed me the whip and I took it, not wanting to give myself away. I walked over to her, guilt and dread in every step. Meeting her eyes, I saw the words she mouthed to me
"It's okay. It's not your fault." She closed her eyes and gave a small nod. When her eyes opened again, it wasn't Alexandrya, I was looking at The Shadow Assassin. Closing my eyes, I let Winter take over. I couldn't bring myself to hurt her.
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I could hear her short gasps of pain as the whip cracked against her back.
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Her gasps turned into screams that broke my soul, but Winter kept going.
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It was over. I tried to force Winter back out of my mind. Alexandrya and I had been working on it along with her dreamwalking. We were both doing pretty well. Eventually, he was locked away again.
As I opened my eyes, I saw her back. Bloody and bruised, because of me. Guilt washed over me. I did this.
"Well done Soldier." Doctor took the whip from my hand as two guards came to get me.
"Wait." Doctor stopped them. "I think it's time we put these two away for a while. We have no real need at the moment."
Put us away? What does that mean? I wondered to myself.
"Prepare them for cryo." After he said that, we were both taken to a new chamber. Her back was still bloody. Still bruised. I felt so guilty.
It was cold. Freezing cold. Then darkness.
A/N Aaaaaaaand THAT'S Chapter 15. Sorry, it's not as good as the last ones have been. I'm working on Chapter 16 today too. It should be up either later today or tomorrow.
Hope you liked it!
Love y'all <3
Kari (pen name)
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The Forgotten Goddess
FanfictionGrowing up as a half-Elven half-Asgardian was never easy on Alexandrya. Her mother died five years after she was born and her father didn't give a rats ass about her. Luckily for Alexandrya, she had two best friends to help her out. That is until he...
