For The Empire - Sempre

Chapter 51

"I cant believe I did that!"

"Why did I do that?"

"I can't face him again!"

"What do I do now?"

"Lucy, take a deep breath," I tell her. "Come here, you're going to make me dizzy if you keep walking in circles like that."

Lucy groans and whines as she plops down next to me, laying her head on my lap. She begins crying quietly. 

"It's okay, Lucy," I tell her softly. "You're probably feeling, a lot of things right now. Happy, confused, scared, worried, and your heart rate was and probably still is racing. You might have even felt a tingle-like feeling up your spine and butterflies in your stomach..."

Lucy sits up and wipes at her face, she looks at me. "Wow, that's pretty much what I'm feeling," She sniffles. "But now I'm mostly scared, and embarrassed that I did that in front of everyone, let alone just did it without asking Marco. Do you think he's mad at me?" 

I laugh as I pull her over to sit next to me. "I seriously doubt Marco is mad at you Luce." Remembering the look on Marco's face afterward. "He kissed you back, remember?" 

"Yeah, but I thought I was making that part up in my head. It felt like everything else around us disappeared and it was just the two of us for just a moment and I got lost in what was going on. Is that normal?"

"Everyone's first kiss is different. When JP and I kissed the first time, we laughed it off, but the next time we kissed it felt a lot like that; where there was just an energy going through both of us," I sigh, remembering that night.

"So what do I do now?" Lucy asks me.

"Well, I think it's time we had the talk that you didn't want to have last year remember?" I smile at her softly. 

Lucy shakes her head "I mean, I know I don't want to do any of that. I can barely wrap my head around just kissing alone. I'll end up having a panic attack for sure, mom." 

I laugh at her over dramatic tendencies. "Fine, but just remember what I said when we were in Miami, don't do anything you don't want to do. Just know you can talk to me about anything," I hug her close to me. 

"And if you decide you want to be more than friends with Marco, JP and I will have to set some boundaries, since we all live together," I tell her. 

Lucy nods. "I don't know if I want to be more than friends. I mean, I really like him. A lot. But I don't know how all of this works." 

I sigh. "You remind me a lot of me when I was your age and when JP and started to become more than friends. And the one thing I will tell you is, don't be afraid to tell Marco how and what you are feeling, even if it's uncomfortable. I can't tell you how many arguments and misunderstandings we would have saved ourselves if JP and I just talked openly. Which is funny because before we were boyfriend and girlfriend we would tell each other everything," I run my fingers through her hair. "And I know Marco will respect you and listen to you."

"He knows what he's doing and I don't have a clue," Lucy says quietly. Talia teasing Lucy comes to my mind and I wonder if she's feeling completely inexperienced and less than in comparison.

"When a boy really likes you and respects you he won't care that you don't know what to do, trust me, Lucy," I reassure her. "Do you think you're ready to face him tonight or do you want to wait until tomorrow?" 

She sits up and then stands. "I'm ready to talk to him. It's not good to put these things off, right?"

"True, but you don't have to do it right now, either."