The Silence Within

7. I'm Still Standing

"You could never know what it's like, Your blood like winter freezes just like ice. And there's a cold lonely light that shines from you. You'll wind up like the wreck you hide behind that mask you use. And did you think this fool could never win? 

Well look at me, I'm coming back again I got a taste of love in a simple way, And if you need to know while I'm still standing, you just fade away.

Don't you know I'm still standing better than I ever did? Looking like a true survivor, feeling like a little kid. I'm still standing after all this time, picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind."

𝕮𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 7: 𝕴'𝖒 𝕾𝖙𝖎𝖑𝖑 𝕾𝖙𝖆𝖓𝖉𝖎𝖓𝖌

 𝔼ver since our disagreement, Nicholas has been avoiding me like a plague. Not that I blame him, maybe it was even me who was avoiding him. I would have been okay with him avoiding me, really I would. If not for the third meeting this week that is happening without me. It's obvious he has a problem with me, fine, but he can't take it out on me professionally. 

I feel like I'm being bullied and he's doing everything possible to keep me out of things. So, here I am, in front of Arthur's office, debating if I should be a tattletale again. I did learn my lesson but I am getting desperate. I heard from Maxton about the meetings, and I see them all going towards the boardroom yet I'm not included in any of it. It's either me asking Arthur about it, not making a big deal, or facing Nicholas and sounding like I'm complaining and I'm sure he'll make a big deal out of it. I chose less of two evils.

-You can come in.- With a deep breath and a nervous gesture, I got into Arthur's office only to see both him and Nicholas in there. To say this is not what I expected would be an understatement. So when Nicholas's piercing blue eyes caught mine I froze. I can't stop blinking, completely baffled at the sight of him. It's been two weeks since I saw him and our last conversation was anything but pleasant. A deep blush settled on my face as I lowered my head in shame remembering how he treated me. 

-Welcome Violet, you said you have something to talk about with me. - It's not like I can tell him the sole reason I wanted to talk with him is positioned next to him. I nervously swallowed a lump in my throat and chose to improvise. 

-I...I'm...I wanted to...- By my stutter and the way I hold myself it's pretty clear how awkward this is. A loud sigh is heard in the room and I lifted my gaze to find a source. It didn't surprise me to see Nicholas shaking his head. 

-I can't believe this... I really hope you're not here to complain again. A dog would learn faster than you.- Now I narrowed my eyes subtly at him not appreciating the way he was talking to me. I kind of deserve it but still... He didn't even hear why I'm there.

-I'm afraid I do not understand, Sir.- I told him while taking a defensive stand in front of him. For a second I thought I saw a smirk on his face but it's gone so fast I might as well have imagined it.

-Alright, I'll give you the benefit of a doubt. Please explain why are you here...- While swallowing a lump stuck in my throat I pinched my skin, thinking about how to get myself out of this situation. None of the reasons I have in my head are good enough to be said out loud. It's like I have a slide show in my head of all the possible answers yet none of them are meant for Nicholas to hear. 

-I'm here to... To talk about my work performance.- This time Nicholas's eyes dance with amusement. Good. I'm glad at least he's having a good time. I surely do not find anything pleasant in this situation, nor amusing. Well, I dug my own grave, now I might as well lie in it.