Chapter 9

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"I'll see your for your second check-up then and if something's wrong, just come in right away, alright?" my doctor said and smiled, holding out her hand to reach for mine. "Yes, thank you" I replied and shook her hand. "Have a nice day." "You too." I grabbed my bag and walked out of the room, smiling at the receptionist and waving at her. "Have a nice day." She was talking on the phone so only she waved back.

I stepped outside and looked around, smiling to myself. So far, everything was alright and there was nothing wrong with the baby and I hoped it would stay that way but I was already scared that something might happen. Online, I had already read about a lot of scary things but it's always like that with the internet, especially when it comes to health. You look up a tiny little symptom like a slight pain in your chest and Google says you've got breast cancer.

I walked down the street and around the corner where more cabs would drive past and waved one over, driving down to Pete's place. When I rang the doorbell, I heard some shouting and quick footsteps, then the door opened. "Pete's almost done, he's showering." I raised one eyebrow at the slim guy in skinny jeans and a dark red shirt. He had long hair that came down to his shoulders. "Or you could just give me the books...?" I asked slowly, unsure what to do. "Oh, no, he told me to tell you to wait so come in." I nodded, still confused but walked past him into the house when he made an inviting motion with his hand. He closed the door, then turned to look at me. "I'm William" he said and waved awkwardly. I laughed to myself but waved back the same way. "Yeah, I know" I grinned. "I'm Charlie." He smirked. "Yeah, I know."

I couldn't stand any more awkwardness so I just took the liberty of crossing the living room and sitting down on the sofa. There was some football match on TV so William sat down next to me and leaned back. "He wanted to talk to you for a second, see how your appointment went" he explained. My eyes widened and I moved back a little, staring at him. "Oh, so you know. Right, cool, I guess" I mumbled sarcastically and shrugged, leaning into the back of the sofa too. He jumped and moved a little closer to me. "Oh, I'm sorry, hey, I'm not going to tell anybody." I nodded slowly. "Yeah, let's hope so." "Don't you trust me?" I frowned. "Of course not, I don't know you." He winked and cracked a half-smile. "Hey, you just said you do." I sighed and rolled my eyes at him. "Which meant that I know your music and your instagram." He smiled and whipped out his phone quickly. "You follow my instagram? Let me just follow you back real quick." I laughed. "Really?" He wiggled his eyebrows. "Yeah, of course." I took a deep breath. "Alright" I said, shaking my head in disbelief.

"Here I am, sorry you had to wait!" I heard from upstairs and Pete came jogging down in just black skinnies and a towel which he rubbed his hair with and then left hanging from his shoulders. I sucked in a breath, hoping that neither of the guys had heard me but I couldn't help but admit to myself that seeing Pete shirtless still had a certain effect on me. Damn, I had to get my shit together somehow. I avoided looking at William in case he had noticed and just got up.

"It's fine, don't worry. And everything's alright with the baby too." Pete face lit up and he breathed out loudly in relief. "Great news" he said. "And how are you doing?" I nodded, then shrugged. "Fine, I guess. I'm off for coffee with Sofia for her lunch break." Pete gave me a quick nod, then disappeared into the kitchen, returning with a stack of books. "Oh, great, thanks" I said, taking them and looking at the titles. "That's awesome, some of these are the ones I wanted to order." "Yeah, Ashlee said they were great." Done with the small talk, we just nodded at eachother again and I felt the sudden urge to leave so things would not get awkward. "Please don't tell any more people though" I said when I turned to the door. Pete gasped. "I'm sorry, I promise I won't." "Hey, it's up to you, I told you to make a choice but I for one am stressed enough, I don't need paparazzi coming after me, thank you very much." William came over with quick steps. "I'm not going to tell anybody, I promise. Although I'm a little insulted you didn't fangirl." I raised my eyebrow and looked alternately at the two guys, waiting for somebody to explain.

"I told William you liked his music, guess he hoped for a different meeting" Pete said. I laughed. "I'm really sorry but hey, you didn't fangirl either." He laughed too. "It was great meeting you anyway" he said. I nodded. "Yeah, likewise. But I should go. Do you have a bag or something?" I asked Pete and he got me a plastic bag I could carry the books in. "Thank you, bye-bye" I said and kissed his cheek because I didn't want to spend any awkward time thinking what the best way to say goodbye to Pete was. I waved at William and closed the door behind myself.

When I entered the Starbucks downtown, Sofia was already waving at me from a table by the window. I made my way through the hipsters and authors and dropped down on the armchair. "You got a good table" I said with satisfaction and she patted her own shoulder. "Kneel down" she grinned. "I took the liberty of ordering for you." I gasped, pretending to be offended. "How dare you? You didn't know what I wanted! How could you predict...?" She laughed into my show and I moved into the comfort of the chair, taking a sip of my hot black coffee.

"So, I just met William Beckett." Her eyes almost popped out of her head. "Really?" "Yeah, he knows I'm pregnant too." "Pete told him?" I nodded. "Yeah and then William said he'd expected me to fangirl because Pete told him I was a fan." "Well, you are." "Yeah but for some reason, I was just too exhausted to be starstruck." Sofia laughed and drank a sip of her tea. "That is awesome, we should put that on a shirt." I inhaled deeply and shook my head. "It sounds awful and I know so many people would want to meet Pete and William and Gabe, you know but living with Pete for a while and having met a few of my biggest idols, it's just not the same. It's like I have bigger problems now." "Well, I still get the giggles when I see Gabe and we've been out quite a lot." "You're different and it's not like my heart didn't skip a beat when I saw William open the door and it's not like I didn't scream on the inside but I just couldn't act on it. Maybe I'm too old for fangirling." Sofia gasped. "You're never too old for fangirling!" "Well, I do hope it comes back once I'm not pregnant anymore." She laughed. "Of course, we'll have to teach her." "A few days ago it was a boy!" "Yeah, we haven't decided yet" Sofia grinned. "Oh, right because it's totally up to you."

Once I was at home, I immediately changed into comfortable clothes and dropped down on the sofa, starting to read the books Pete had given me. I hoped that they had actually helped Ashlee and that they would also help me. I would somehow manage to get this all under control, I would go through with starting my own paper and I would have a baby and handle it. I would be a good mother and I would somehow work things out with Pete so the kid wouldn't miss anything, it would have it's mother and Pete equally, just like Bronx.

Just while reading and thinking about it all, I felt myself maturing. My relationship with Pete had already taught me what's important when you're part of a serious relationship, what sacrifices you have to make and what it gives back to you. But now this was a whole different thing I was learning about and I wouldn't mess this up. My baby would be the most important thing for me, something to be proud of and something to be responsible for. It would be amazing and reading the books turned into fun, learning more and preparing myself for something I looked forward to, I wasn't dreading it anymore, the fact that I wouldn't be a great mother, I really really just wanted to try and prove I could do it and I wanted to succeed.

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