Burden // LS STORY

Part 13.

Today was the beginning of mid-semester break, we were allowed to go home for the 2-week break or stay on campus for the holiday. I was conflicted in what I wanted to do. I wanted to go home and see Mum, Mark and the girls, but I needed to wait until Harry was out of confinement to make sure he was okay. It's been 4 days so far and there was still no sign of him.

I had been staying in his bed through the duration as I couldn't be anywhere near Zayn right now, he was the reason Harry was in confinement in the first place. And I still hadn't forgiven him for bringing my relationship with Mark into this, he knew after everything I was always worried what Mark thought of me, considering I was never blood, he had no obligations to stay in contact with me, and if my sexual preferences would in any way cause a hinderance in what he thought of me, I don't know what I would do.

I chose to stay and wait for Harry, I had to see him. I couldn't leave without seeing him.

I told mum that I hoped I would be home at some point in the two weeks, and I kind of thought about bringing Harry with me to introduce him to her, as a friend, or boyfriend, significant other that was really good at going down on me, I really wasn't too sure how I was going to introduce him to her, but I know that I wanted them to meet.

Everyone left campus pretty early this morning, they all had flights or buses to catch. I really didn't think Matron would keep Harry over home visits. Surely not? And 4 days was already an extended amount of time than the 48 hours he and I were held in there.

I sat in Harry's dorm room alone, Nick and Niall had already left to go and visit their parents and I had no idea, or care about where Liam was. I was surprised that he hadn't said anything about all of this, the news of me and Harry had been spread throughout the whole school, all thanks to Zayn. Couldn't keep his big mouth shut, but thankfully, Harry held enough of a figure around here that no one battered an eyelid to it.

When I heard the door creek from behind me, my heart fluttered thinking it could be no one else but Harry, but I was mistaken when all I saw was Matron.

"Not going home for the holiday son?" she asked as she sat herself on the opposite end of Harry's bed.

I look at her with a dumbfounded look, she surely knew who I was waiting for.

"I'm just, I wanted to see Harry before I left" I mumble to her.

Her eyebrows raise in concern, "Hun, Harry was let out last night?" she replies.

I'm immediately shocked. "What?" I muttered.

"Yes, I let him go late last night. I suspected he would want to go home for the holidays, so I didn't hold him." She explained.

I nod my head in agreement.
"You enjoy your break okay?" she encouraged before heading out of the room.

Harry had gotten out last night, it's now lunch time the following day and I hadn't seen or heard from him.

Was he now avoiding me?

Had he left already for his hometown?

Why wouldn't he say goodbye to me?

I grab my things in frustration and stuff them into a backpack, I didn't even feel like going home now, I just wanted to be alone. With everything that was happening at the moment, I had never felt so lost or confused on who I was or where I was meant to be. When I was with Harry, I was sure of my feelings, I felt like I was more myself than I ever had been with anyone else and I was exactly where I belonged, but when I was away from Harry. That's when it was all shit, that's why I questioned everything and when those around me who had been there forever told me that I was something else, I didn't know what to believe.

Was I discovering myself with Harry or was I just captivated with the idea of Harry, was it one of those, you want what you can't have scenarios?

I flung the bag over my shoulder and headed out of the main hall, the plan was just to walk into town, it was going to be a fair walk, but I didn't have any need to get anywhere, and I needed the fresh air.

"Lou?" I hear my name being called from beside the building I had just exited.

I look over to see Harry stepping out of the shadows. I exhaled a breath I didn't know I had contained when I saw him.

"I thought you'd left already?" I reply to him in a harsh tone. I was frustrated with him still.

He shook his head whilst continuing his path toward me. "No, I'm not going home these holidays."

"Oh' I gasp in shock. "Why not?"

"Parents and sister are on holidays, no one would be home anyway. Are you headed home?" he asks.

To be fair, I had absolutely no fucking idea Harry.

"Wasn't sure yet." I say in honesty.

He looks over at the full backpack on my back. "Where you headed?"

"Where were you?" I deflect his question with one of my own.

He looks at me confused.

"Matron said she let you out last night. Where were you?" I repeat.

"I came past the room and when I saw you asleep in my bed, I couldn't bring myself to wake you. You looked to peaceful" he mumbled. An embarrassed look washing over him.

I must say I was a little flustered as well "Oh" is all I manage to reply with.

"So, where you going? What's the plan for the break?" he pounded.

I shrug my shoulders. "Didn't know. Wanted to see you and then, I dunno?"

He couldn't hide the smirk that ran across his face. "Your only plan was to see me?" he teases.

I let out a chuckle through my breath. "I guess so" I admit.

He walks up closer to me, so we are now face to face, he brings his hands up to either side of my shoulders and lets his hands troll down the length of my arm until he gets to my hands. I feel the hesitation caused by nervous once he reaches my fingers.

I take the initiative and shift my fingers, so they interlock with his. Both of us now displaying nervous smiles on our faces.

"Everyone has left for the break, the halls are pretty empty, did you want to hang out for a bit?" I suggest to him.

Seeing how his face lit up at the idea of actually being alone gave me all the answers I needed. "Yeah" he mumbles at me as I let go of one of his hands and walk linked in the other back up the stairs of the main building.

So Harry and I would get to be alone for a few days, without the complications of Zayn, without the complications of what people would be saying about us, without having to worry about anything really except for being with one another, what could possibly go wrong?