I'm here

Fifteen

Kiana cuddled her teddy bear tighter as tears streamed down her face. She couldn't do this anymore. She only felt sadness. She didn't want to live anymore.

No, stop being irrational.

It's not irrational, everything's too much. It's all too much.

I don't want to do this anymore.

I can't do this anymore.

I really can't.

Cassie and Tom laid in their bed worried about their bestfriend, she only came out of her room when it came to showering and eating a single snack a day to claim she had eaten.

They hated seeing her like this.

She refused to unlock her door. They couldn't call her phone as it was off.

When they'd speak to her through the door she'd utter one word answers or ignore them. They knew she was going through a lot and needed her space but they hated seeing her like this.

It was now six weeks since the day that Kiana went to Francesca's.

She felt alone.

That was the only way to describe what was going on in her head.

Loneliness consumed her entire being. She wanted to get out of this black never ending black hole of sadness, but she didn't know how.

Life felt like an entire building had fallen on top of her and no one was there to help her get out.

She wanted to end it all. But she couldn't. She couldn't give up. She had friends who cared about her. She had patients who respected her and needed her. Her death would do more harm than she intended.

Kiana looked over at her bedside table and saw her untouched medication. She had to take it day by day. She needed to get better. She had to. For herself. She needed to put herself first.

Wiping her tears away, keeping her teddy bear sat next to her, Kiana sat up and reached over to grab the medication.

Just take one and everything will get better she thought to herself.

She swallowed the pill with a gulp of water from her water bottle.

She slowly inhaled and exhaled to allow herself to just breathe.

Just breathe, come on.

Kiana looked at this as the first step to getting better.

She knew she could do it. She knew she could get out of this depressive episode. She just needed to take it day by day. Hour by hour. Minute by Minute.