How do you figure out your feelings once that someone is not by your side anymore? Maybe it is a bad luck in love or a simple disinterested. I wish sometimes I could go back in time and not to change your decision but to change something specific. It might sound like I'm contradicting myself but that's the only thing I wish for. So many things could have been better if I stand up for myself and for what I wanted. And who I wanted. I guess no one told me that love could be so effortless and that it could slipped easily from my hands. I could say that I wish things were different but I don't think that this love was meant to be.
In movies You see beautiful scenes and you dream about it with someone. You wish it would happen to you. Just like a simple date at the beach watching sunset. Wouldn't it be romantic enough?
I have my ways to cope with what I think could have happened wouldn't be so different. But the only thing I want at this moment is to go back in time and do things differently.
Like... do you remember the first time we met? It felt like a dream come true. At least for me. I don't know about you. See.. here is where I would do things different. I had never asked you what did you think when you first saw me. I have never asked you what was your feelings when i told you i like you. If only our communication were clearer, I wouldn't be here having all these questions in my head and only for myself. Like a conversation with myself feeling like I'm stupid. I know now you are happy with the one you made your wife. I don't wanna come out selfish but I was too late or maybe i didn't insist. But I respect your decision because our destiny wasn't in our hands. If i could had a time machine I would have change that.
not for you to choose me but at least I could have a moment with you. Make memories that I would never forget.
For this weird future i wish this feeling was never here so we can meet again. So we can talk like two normal people. I don't ask you to be friends but at least we can catch up some time. Oh by the way, I still feel guilty to make you feel like you hurt me. But it wasn't your fault. It's only me. I'm the only one that felt this way. Maybe I was dreaming too much. A fantasy world that this world can never archive. Simulation of a movie scene, too beautiful to become reality. As deep as it might feel, i thank you for snapping me out of it and bringing me back to this reality.
I wonder how you are and if you think of me. I have so many questions to ask but that is only if we meet again.
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Things I've never saidPoetry
TINS To the things I've never said. To the things you've never said. To the the words that have never been spoken To all those emotions that couldn't have a chance to be expressed. To all and every single piece of mind that could never been...