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Summary: When visiting Spencer in prison, he tries to break up with Y/N because he doesn't think that he's a good person. Y/N reassures him that he is.
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Y/N waited for Spencer to be brought into the room. The metal walls made it extremely cold, causing Y/N to wrap her jacket a little tighter around her body. All she wanted to do was get Spencer out of here. It had been just over a month since Spencer was put into prison and Y/N hadn't been able to sleep properly. She constantly thought about Spencer in prison and was plagued with worry.
A month in an empty bed was novel for Y/N. She missed the warmth Spencer's body would provide her. She missed the way he would hold her close. She missed the way he would whisper sweet nothings into her ear. She missed him.
The door opened and Spencer was brought in. He looked dishevelled. His hair had grown and was messy. He had a stubble, which Y/N hadn't seen on him for a while. And to top it off, he had plenty of bruises on his face.
Spencer sat down opposite her. Despite all of the torment he had gone through in prison, he smiled. Seeing Y/N's face always put him in a good mood. All he wanted to do was reach over the table and take her hand in his but he knew he couldn't.
"Spencer..." Y/N breathed out. It had been a couple of weeks since she had seen him, letting members of the BAU take her visiting spot so they could find out what really happened in Mexico.
"Y/N..." Spencer said quietly.
It took everything in Y/N not to lunge over the table and hug the life out of him right there and then. She held her hands together on the table and just looked at Spencer.
"How did you get those bruises?" Y/N questioned.
"A couple of prisoners beat me up," Spencer answered and Y/N tensed up at the thought of Spencer being beat up.
"We're going to get you out of here Spencer." Y/N leaned forward in her seat slightly.
Spencer looked down for a moment, fiddling with the sleeve of his shirt, "Maybe I shouldn't get out."
"What?" Y/N furrowed her eyebrows in confusion, "Spence, you're innocent. You're going to get out of here."
"What if I belong here?" Spencer said.
"What are you saying?" Y/N said, "You don't belong here Spencer. You belong with me, and Emily, JJ, Penelope, Rossi - everyone."
"Well, maybe I shouldn't get out, maybe I killed that woman in Mexico." Spencer mumbled, looking directly at Y/N.
"Spencer, listen to me, you are not a cold blooded killer. You are Spencer Reid and you are the smartest, kindest, most caring person I have ever met. You are them man I love." Y/N stated, wating nothing more than to reach out to him in that moment.
Spencer didn't say anything for a moment. He was thinking about what Y/N saif. He knew that she loved him and he loved her more than anything. She was his everything. However, he couldn't help but think that Y/N could do so much better.
"I think you should go, Y/N." Spencer spoke.
"Spence, I'm not leaving," Y/N said, "I haven't seen you in weeks."
"No I don't mean leave here, Y/N. I mean leave me." Spencer said, his heart breaking with every word he spoke.
"I'm not leaving you. Especially not now." Y/N said, raising her voice slightly.
"You deserve someone good, Y/N. Someone who isn't away constantly and someone who can spend all their time with you." Spencer replied.
"You are good, Spencer. And I don't care that you are away all the time," Y/N started, "Because I know that when you come home, I can give you all the loving you deserve - and you do deserve it."
Spencer didn't speak, but he could feel a single tear run down his cheek. He hastily wiped it away before looking at Y/N. Her eyes were brimmed with tears. Her hands fiddled with the ring that Spencer had given her six months ago. Her engagement ring.
"I'm sorry, Y/N." Spencer said, letting a few more tears fall down his face.
"It's okay, Spencer," Y/N said, slowly inching her hands to the middle of the table - Spencer doing the same. Their fingertips gently brushed past each other for a split second before they pulled away, knowing that they couldn't touch - Y/N didn't want to get Spencer in trouble.
Even if their touch was only for a split second. Y/N could still feel the warmth Spencer gave off. She could still feel the ghost if his fingertips on hers. She longed for more but she knew that it wasn't possible.
"I just want to feel you." Y/N said, a tear escaping her eye.
"As do I." Spencer replied, wanting to reach across the table and hold Y/N in his arms like he always would. His fingers would gently caress her sides as her hands would tangle in his hair. The two of them being lost in their own world.
"I love you, Spencer, so much." Y/N said, tearfully.
"I love you too, Y/N." Spencer said, looking deeply into her eyes.
"And don't forget Spencer, that you are a good person and don't belong here," Y/N said, "We will get you out of here, no matter what it takes."
