TripleEz is Coming

Genius Pigeons

Rabies has told me that my announcements have been getting a little monotonous and that I need to cover a broader range of topics. That’s why I’m going to be sharing a little bit more of news from around the galaxy.

 Down on Earth many of the pigeons have been displaying a higher level of intelligence than is normally associated with birds. They appear to have set up a competition to try and isolate the most brilliant of their kind. This seems to take the form of the quiz shows enjoyed by many of the leading indigenous species, namely humans. The program will be broadcast every Sunday so we’ll update you then.

 The birds have also used sign language to communicate that they have booked a request for a hostile take over slot. They also informed us that they’d been told that they would be accommodated ‘at some point’ but that there was a rising interest in conquering the Earth and that they were all booked up for the next few years.

 Just for those of you who were wondering exactly how we were planning on dealing with this competition, we are on the waiting list and we will give you the definite date as soon as we have it.

 I know that some of you must be curious as to procedure when a conquest is successful but the whole point is that you try and then you fail or something happens that means that the whole thing was just a dream. Things like that. Nobody has ever successfully conquered the world. I’m sure that TripleEz will try at some point and I sincerely doubt that SHE/HE/IT/THEY will follow procedure. That’s because IT/THEY/SHE/HE is a being of ultimate evil who therefore lacks in basic manners. So, when TripleEz conquers you, well, Earth is essentially done for.

 Also, Alan has been in hospital getting checked up so all of the meetings on TripleEz have been postponed to a later date. Don’t worry. They will happen. There will be more definite news when we have it but for the moment I’m just going to have to ask you to be patient.

 The pigeons have told us that they will be scheduled in at some point. They tell us that it will definitely happen. They have rights. They won’t be denied. They all flew away then but they didn’t seem able to recreate the synchronized flying display that they demonstrated earlier. They winged away like different, sadder, wiser pigeons. Our hearts go with them in this struggle. May they receive the necessary permits to achieve their dreams, no matter how evil and corrupt those dreams may be.

 The weekend encroaches, friends, and I need to write another update or Rabies will scream the names of mere mortal humans who have achieved immortality through being bitten by immortal creatures at me.

 Hail the Robocalypse!

ZiziTheRobot