TripleEz is Coming

Purple Flying Moles

Well, I'm sorry for not posting yesterdays notifications but the signal on base is always patchy at this sort of time of month. It was great plugging in knowing that General Morris would be quoting that ridiculous film at a blob of pink putty somewhere on base instead of lying prone. It was perfect to know that somewhere Fifi and Bobby were hugging and being happy and mostly healthy and above all together. The knowledge that Rabies was sitting somewhere minus a leg didn't quite bring me so much pleasure but every silver lining has a cloud.

Unfortunately we are being attacked, well sued, by a group of angry moles due to our request for scientists to help us crack the cheese conundrum. They say that anyone who knowingly harbors a scientist is as bad as a scientist and must die. It's something to do with a guy called, and I quote, 'Avocado' and his number. Apparently they also tried to sue him but he died before they got any official recognition as sentient creatures. I get the feeling that they do a lot of suing.

They've been sending us some legal people or moles if you want to get specific. Like all cosmonautic moles, they're purple and they fly. Well, they do need to get up here somehow and we have no jurisdiction on the Earth. Yet. TripleEz sent us a message saying that her/his/their/its 'servants' will sue us blind so that we can't report on its/her/their/his wrongdoings and sheer levels of evil. We don't know what servants the message is referring to but it will be tough dealing with two legal attacks.

Oh. Oops. We just received another message but this time from Jay Suss. He writes: Seriously? By Pops, you lot are thick. Did you not realize that moles were TripleEz's creatures? That... being... has obviously found an excuse for them to attack you. Next time I swear on Dad that I am not helping. The only reason I'm sending this message is, Daddy, I don't know. I'm just going to drop this pen now and this will never, ever, ever be sent. Not if I have anything to do about it.

And the letter has just spontaneously combusted. According to General Morris, who handed me the letter, it was delivered by one of his winged servants so it was probably a miss understanding. Also, the winged servant exploded into feathers so the human drone slaves will be having roast chicken thing for dinner tonight.

By the way, if anyone has seen her pen as it's apparently having its weekly, or thursdayly, psychotic episode. It's not to be approached unless you're Mysterious Ezila who just does stuff and has mysterious abilities. I've sort of given up on trying to control that robot. So, yeah.

We've found out a bit about 'Avocado'. I'm not sure how a green lumpy thing has a number or sentience... Moles are crazy. The purple moles turned up but they ran into some of the exploding cheese traps that we left rigged up so they're being really grumpy about the whole legal thing. And Fifi just told me that the giant lizards have rocked up and are eating them. Sorry. Hey, we're starting up a 'visit the moon' scheme for school kids which will be fun and educational. Comment if you want to sign up.

Mysterious Ezila has also sent me a document recently given to us by the urgent meeting, Alan. Magister decided that we needed to find Spike the unicorn, as TripleEz's bodyguard is now known. The artwork was based on a description so we don't know how accurate it is but if you do see a unicorn who looks like that then just let us know and we'll follow the lead and submit you for immeadiate mind wiping and reeducation.

Hail the Robocalypse

ZiziTheRobot