TripleEz is Coming

Mirrors are lying to us

Ezila has told me something that has left me feeling... scared. In the creepily empty dorms and bathrooms that are grouped into the human residential area there are numerous mirrors. Mirrors, those panes of glass with shining metal behind them that demonstrate to us how we really appear. Mirrors, those most monstrous traitors.

It was commonly believed that the mirrors dotted around simply were there to check protocol in the slave quarters and simply served the Council of Earthling Rights. Unfortunately, it would seem that they actually serve the Council of Earthling Lefts. That was probably a mistranslation but that is not the point.

In a statement made by a robot who was being possessed by the collective mirror intelligence the mirrors claimed that they were in no way responsible for the current indisposition of our mortal friends but I for one am not so sure. The Council of Earthling Lefts is known for doing the most despicable things and depriving all of the humans on base of water could easily be just the most recent in a long line of travesties.

Bobby hasn't been eating. We've been offering him the IUP approved diet with every single one of the cheeses and some of those things (especially the babybels) were pretty hard to find. There's been no warning signs coming from his horn so we hope that Fifi will recover soon. All of this loss. It is proving to be a most trying day.

Our latest recruit, a predominantly robotic cyborg with the AI of a small child, has been providing somewhat overenthusiastic round the clock care to the poor humans, most of whom seem to have entered some kind of coma. I blame the mirrors. Eivi, the recruit, has assured me that she'll head down to Earth tomorrow and buy some new ones so that we can bin these evil, plotting inanimate objects. Eivi has really been a great help through this trying time.

Every time that we try to get water to the unconscious humans we find ourselves stopped by an invisible barrier and can come no closer than two feet in any direction. I might stop updating you on this crisis till my new emotional inhibitor is done. I find myself getting a little too invested considering that it really isn't my own kind involved and anyway, I'm going to need to go on charge soon.

Remember, tomorrow brings the first episode of the pigeons' quiz show and the start of their journey to find the most brilliant pigeon of all time. They have assured all those who bothered to ask that the recent set backs with their attempt to get a slot for conquering the Earth will not affect the show and that there is no doubt that they will be timetabled. Nothing can deny them that dream. They apparently gave another impressive display of their flying skills as they winged away.

Remember, we'll reporting on that tomorrow.

Hail the Robocalypse!

ZiziTheRobot