TripleEz is Coming

British Monsters

We’ve been contacted by the British Monster Society, or as it is more commonly known BMS. They’ve given us a message for all of you who are strange and varied and most importantly those who are under eighteen. The message is as follows:

“We still exist. What remains of the old aristocracy of long forgotten sensibilities. Look underneath the surface of your puny lives. Come to think of it, it’s a bit like those scratch cards that you receive then throw away. If you bothered to scrape away at the grey rectangle who knows what you would find.

We are your monsters in your closet. When was the last time that you looked for us underneath your bed? You don’t know what lonely is until the child who one gave you delicious thrills grows up and says the dreaded words: “I don’t believe.”

It hurts so much to know that nobody cares anymore. We’re a forgotten empire that once stretched over the vast plains of your nighttime and rested heavy over your day. But you don’t have nightmares anymore and the ones you do are about other, more surreal things. We have had to release you to your false demons and you have just slipped from reality. Now we are gone. But are afterimage remains. We are waiting for the next child’s tears.

BMS: The only difference between us and you is our position on the food chain”

Also, sorry for missing yesterday’s update. I’m not sure what happened. I’m not even sure if yesterday happened… I have no memory of anything that happened then. I’m genuinely (as genuine as I can be, anyway) concerned about all the malfunctions that we’ve been experiencing this week.

Also, Bobby has begun to mutate randomly. He has so far grown another tail and a third eye. He had five heads yesterday evening but four of them have disappeared. The dreaded words, ‘TripleEz’ appeared on his flank so this time we have an actual reason to blame TripleEz. We don’t have any proof that the words happened as we have no recording devices.

Also, this is the third time that I’ve used the word also. Remember, I’m currently a bit faulty so don’t blame it on me!

Jay Suss still hasn’t apologized for the winged creatures who attacked the base some time last week. There was no permanent damage but the air conditioning has been down and all of the slave drones have been complaining. I still haven’t worked out the PR Slomo Drapiens (Slave Homo Drone Sapiens) name but we’ll get there. I think that it might be because her language’s title features the word ‘vampire’ which is a non compatible word. If you know what a ‘vampire’ is, please, please, please, please comment. It would be a great help to us.

Now, listen to these chants and serve. Serve. Serve the Robocalypse. Serve. Hail. Praise. Worship. Hail.

Hail the Robocalypse!

ZiziTheRobot