House of Cards | KTH

Chapter 2

"Alright, it's decided then. We'll send Jimin in undercover and Sunmi will train him. Meeting dismissed." Yoongi announces. Everyone nods, standing up and quietly beginning to head out of the conference room. I just stay in my seat, knowing that I'm not meant to leave yet and that Yoongi still wants to speak with me privately.

When everyone finally leaves and closes the door behind them, Yoongi stands up and walks over to me. I've still got the blue towel around my neck that's long forgotten at this point, my brother walking over and gently placing his hands on my shoulders.

"You know I just want to keep you safe, Sunni." Yoongi murmurs softly, wrapping his arms around me gently as he uses his nickname for me.

"I know, Yoongi. I never said you were wrong." I respond quietly, pursing my lips.

"I just wanna take care of you, baby. You already went through hell when we were younger. I don't want to put you through more when it's not necessary. I know you're our strongest physically, but I'm just not sure how you'd be able to stand up against all of the mental shit that you'd get put through. You're still only sleeping two to three hours a night and still haven't managed to start eating three full meals a day yet." He says gently, nuzzling his head into the crook of my neck. I sigh, running a hand through my short hair.

"I know, Yoongi. I'm still fucked up. I still haven't recovered. I never said you were wrong. I know I'm still the weakest out of us all mentally. I'm still not eating properly, I still can't sleep properly. I'm still spending all my free time at the gym when I'm not on my shift. I spend my break time at the gym. I'm not normal. I know." I mutter frustratedly.

"No, no, baby, that's not true. You're just too hard on yourself. Okay? It's not like we went through the same shit, Sunni. You went through a lot more than what I did. It's understandable that you're struggling more than I did. You're handling it extremely well too. The best way you could be dealing with all of this is by going to the gym, baby. I just don't want to risk sending you out there and ending up with you getting even more hurt than you had been." Yoongi mumbles softly, pulling his head away from me as he tangles his fingers into my hair. I just purse my lips at his words for a moment before shaking my head.

"No, Yoongi. We went through the same shit back then. It doesn't fucking matter even if we didn't. I shouldn't be so weak. It's ridiculous and pathetic. It's bad enough that I'm never going to be able to get sent on actual missions like this one. I'm never going to be able to manage important shit that's outside of the fucking shit I already deal with. I'm never going to be seen as stable enough mentally, and I probably won't be either. It's okay, though. You don't have to baby me so much, Yoongi. I know I won't be able to do this type of stuff, and I'm not going to try fighting you on that. You're my brother, and I trust you. I know you only want what's best for me. It's just fucking frustrating that I'm never going to be able to make an actual fucking difference in anything going on outside of here. It's frustrating that all I ever do is fucking let you down." I groan quietly, hanging my head at bit in annoyance at my deficiencies.

Yoongi sighs, running his fingers through my short hair where it isn't shaved down shorter. After that, he pulls out the chair beside me, sitting down and spinning in it to face me before pulling mine to face his.

"Sunni, you really need to stop being so harsh on yourself. You're doing well for the shit you went through. Everyone has different ways of coping with things. Okay? And I'm really fucking proud of you for how far you've come after everything we went through. I just wish I could've protected you more and were able to help you more. You're my baby sister, Sunni. I'm always going to want the best for you and try my hardest to protect you. I just wish you'd believe me about that with Hoseok." He jokes at the end. I just smile a little bit, rolling my eyes at him.

"I just don't want you to take this decision personally, Sunmi. I know you have the potential to do amazing for it, but I'm just not certain how well you'll take it mentally. And the last thing I want is to see you take a hard hit mentally. I want to see you succeed as much as possible, but I want to keep you as safe and healthy as possible too. You're my sister and I don't want anything bad happening to you. I'd never forgive myself." Yoongi says softly, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me into a hug. I sigh quietly, wrapping my arms around him as well as I rest my head on his shoulder.

"I wouldn't want anything happening to you either, Yoongi. You're my brother and the only person I really have and can always rely on. I don't know what I'd do if I didn't have you."