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I've always been kind of a psychopath.

To quote a song I like: 'I was born sick, but I love it.'

Ever since I could properly think, which was insanely early, I knew I was different from other kids. Me and my twin brother both were. I wasn't one of those kids who killed animals for fun, but ever since my tiny brain could understand the concept, I was obsessed with ghouls. Me and my brother both.

The only difference was that my brother wanted to study them, and I wanted to be one. I'd heard stories about half-ghouls, so I knew it was possible. I was a little disappointed that I wasn't born one, but another part of me was glad, since the chances of being born dead or too human were very high. I had done my research, and I knew there had to be a way to fuse my body with a ghoul's. As soon as I could I formed a plan and sneaked out of my home in search for ghouls.

I remember it quite well. I walked into the shadiest shop I could find, hoping it was run by a ghoul. There was a nice looking man inside. At first I thought he was human, but then his light-haired son came down the stairs with his kakugan activated. The man tried to threaten me to secrecy, but I didn't flinch. I sweet-talked him into helping me find a surgeon and ghoul organs that would fit into my six-year-old body. Yes, six years old. The craziest ones start early. I told you I was insane.

Anyhow, the man found me a surgeon, proper organs, and most importantly; a kakuhou from... let's call it a donor. One thing lead to another, and I woke up on the surgeon's table. The man from the shop and his son were gone, but I didn't care. I had accomplished my goal. I thanked the surgeon and left a note at the shop to thank the man and boy for their help. Then I went back to my home.

I wanted to show my parents what I'd become. I wanted them to be proud, so when I reached them I activated my kakugan to show them my new self. I will always remember the look of fear and disgust on their face. It angered me so, so much.

So I killed them.

Before I knew it my kagune, which turned out to be a koukaku, activated and curled around my arm. I slashed at my parents, wounding them fatally. It wasn't my intention, but I couldn't control myself. I didn't really care though. That was the biggest difference between me and my brother. I was very solitary where my brother always sought my parents confirmation and affection. I'm still not sure what happened to him after that, because he wasn't home that day and I left afterwards.

I lived on the streets for years after that, getting stronger. I wasn't satisfied with my kagune, not because it was a koukaku, but because it was weak. So I went out on the streets and found a random ghoul with a rinkaku kagune. I took him back with me to the surgeon and got myself another kakuhou and organ transplant. And that's how I got my very own version of a chimera kagune. Then I started cannibalizing other ghouls to become a kakuja. Only then was I strong enough.

Once I was satisfied I went to Aogiri. I was eleven years old at the time. Eto and Tatara were the only ones who knew I was a half-ghoul. They took me in and gave me a mask, which had a simple design of a demon. Because of my frequent killing sprees over the years, I became known as 'the Red Demon'.

In fact, I just returned from one. It was late afternoon, and covered in blood and wearing my mask I entered the building of our base in the 11th ward. Using my kagune I jumped the stairs to make my way to the roof. I saw Eto sitting there, her feet dangling over the edge. I walked up to her, letting the wind blow through my long white hair.

"Back from another slaughter party, I see", Eto said as she patted beside her, signalling me to sit.

I did so and took off my mask to look over the city.

"Yes", I said. "It's a shame the CCG will give Rize all the credit. Again."

"You should stop complaining, Eiko", Eto giggled. "Let the CCG hunt the binge-eater. All the ghouls know it was you."

"It's not fair", I whined. "Rize is not the only mass-murderer in this city."

"You do kill lots of people. Ghouls and humans alike. Why?", Eto asked. "It's not for food, right?"

"Of course not", I answered, slightly offended by her assumption. "I am no binge-eater."

"Well then why do you kill so many?", Eto answered with a serious expression.

"Like you wouldn't know", I answered. "It's for fun of course!"

"Right", Eto giggled. "How could I forget?"

I looked at Eto. She was like a big sister to me. Just as crazy, even though she was a few years older. She was one of the few ghouls I respected and she wouldn't have any trouble killing me if she wanted to. The CCG didn't know of my existence, but I think I would be rated S.

"Anyway, I should get going", I mumbled as I got up. "I'm gonna take a shower before all the blood dries."

"Of course", Eto answered with a smile. "See you later, Eiko-chan."

I waved goodbye and walked back into the building. I made my way down the stairs until I reached the floor where my room was. I walked inside and closed the door with my kagune before grabbing some clean clothes out of my closet. I was careful not to get blood on them, because I had to go somewhere later.

I carefully placed the clothes on the sink and turned on the shower. Then I stripped of my clothes and stepped in. Fully relaxing, I washed off all the blood, watching the water change from red to pink to clear. I washed my hair before turning off the shower and wrapping myself in a towel. I looked in the mirror and inspected the 'beauty marks' I had made on myself. The line on my neck, which I covered with a collared shirt, and the one running down my left arm, which I covered with long sleeves. I shrugged and quickly got dressed. I brushed my teeth to get rid of the taste of flesh and hopped out of the bathroom.

I walked over to my bed, glancing at the framed picture on my nightstand. I picked it up. It was of me and my brother, before I became a ghoul. Our light hair was ruffled and we had the biggest smiles on our faces. I didn't remember it being taken. It was taken before my brain could comprehend what a picture was. I gently let my finger slide over my brother's face and put the frame down. Then I turned around and walked out of my room.

I was skipping down the stairs when I saw a familiar bluenette walking in front of me.

"Ayato-chan!", I said as I tried to ruffle his hair.

He dodged my hand and grabbed my wrist. He narrowed his eyes at me, at which I smirked.

"I thought I told you to stop calling me that", he answered.

"Fine", I said as I started walking down the stairs with him. "...Ayo-kun."

He rolled his eyes. Then he looked at me out of the corner of his eyes. He suddenly reached out and ruffled my hair, messing it up completely.

"Ayato-chan!", I whined as I tried to fix it. He burst out laughing.

Ayato was one of the few people I didn't hate. I could actually say I liked him, along with Eto. Ayato was a few years younger than me, and even though he took his time accepting me we treated each other as brother and sister now.

"Anyway...", I started after I had somewhat fixed my hair. "I was on my way to Anteiku, do you want to come?"

Ayato stopped dead in his tracks and looked at me.

"You know I don't go there", he answered. "Ever."

"I know", I mumbled. "I just thought you might want to come."

"Well, I don't", Ayato answered as he continued walking.

It was silent for a moment as we kept walking down the stairs, passing other ghouls every now and then.

"Check on her for me, will you?", Ayato then softly asked.

"Of course", I answered.



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