𝘤𝘳𝘪𝘮𝘴𝘰𝘯 犬夜叉 ♡ ; 𝚗𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚔𝚞 𝚡 𝚘𝚌

entry 28

a/n; these next few chapters are going to be of her journal entries. I'm actually enjoying this method of character development!

♥

I keep having the same dream whether it be about my father or Naraku it seems to come across the same theme every time: protection.

i imagine my father and i out into the fields where the lilies were in full bloom and we would sit on the ground and my father would make little accessories for m. he would make me crowns and bracelets and little rings made of lilies and i would feel so safe with him.

My father was my rock and he always guided me in the right direction. When he died... i didn't know what to do after him and i forced myself to learn. I didn't have to resort to selling myself in the beginning but... the few times... it kept me out of the rain.

My father... was a good man. And i miss him terribly. He was my concern and i was his. He made me feel like i could conquer the world with my own two hands and i believed him... really i did and i didnt want to lose him.

He fought to protect me. He fought to protect our mother and he fought to protect that sword.

That damn sword.

If it wasn't for that sword he would still be here. We would still be a family. We...

We would be in the same world together and i wouldn't have to live like an outcast everywhere i go. Paying a heavier inn fee for a stay and having to sit outside of a food stand because of how i look.

Back home, in our castle, we were feared and respected. when mother died, they let us stay in the castle because i was her daughter and i was supposed to be the next heir but the ignorant laws here forbade it from happening and pushed the next of kin to my father and he simply refused. He didn't want to be emperor. His heart was with the blade and to me.

He agreed to protect the city in exchange for continuing with his own matters of handling things. This meant he was on the throne but he never attended meetings, he never acquired another wife, he never went to war. He opted out of the role of emperor and war general and just settled to guiding those in place of where they needed to go.

The people hated it. They felt cheated out of an emperor but what was he supposed to do? Leave his daughter behind to fend on her own? He wouldn't do that and my mother wouldn't allow it!

They stabbed him in the middle of night; i remember it like yesterday...

He stumbled into my room clutching his abdomen, hunched over in pain. His usually neat dark hair fell across his face and stuck to his cheeks as he broke out into a cold sweat. His blue and gold robe hung half off his shoulders and i saw it.

They stabbed him in the shoulder and the outer abdomen.

His flesh painted a scarlet red and his breath hoarse and raspy.

he clutched that same sword in his opposite hand and fell to his knees with the hilt holding him up for support until i was able to catch him. I didn't care about his blood; i just knew something was wrong that night.

I... i still feel his blood on my hands and how cold he felt.

I remember the roaring yells of the peasants and even the shrieks of the maids in the castle.

They wanted to kill us all.

I am the only one left.

Father...

Why did you leave me?

I didn't do anything to deserve this.

Why aren't you here to protect me?