imperfect fit ; an everlark au based off of 'the selection' series

f i f t y - e i g h t

I debate claiming the stomach flu. Or an incapacitating headache. Panic attack. Really, anything to get out of going to breakfast.

Then I think of Peeta and how he always talked about putting on a brave face. That's not particularly one of my strengths. But if I go downstairs at least, if I can just be present, maybe he'll give me some credit.

In hopes that I can erase some of what I've done, I ask my maids to put me in the most demure dress I have. Based on that request alone, they know not to ask about the night before. The neckline is a bit higher than the ones we typically wear in the warm, Capitol weather, and it has sleeves that go nearly to my elbows. It's flowery and cheerful, the opposite of last night's getup.

I can barely look at Peeta when I enter the dining room, but I walk tall at least.

When I finally peek at him, he's watching me, grinning. As he chews his food, he winks at me; and I duck my head again, pretending to be very interested in my quiche.

"Glad to see you in actual clothes today," Delly spits.

"Glad to see you in a good mood."

"What in the world has gotten into you?" she hisses. What's up with me?

Dejected, I give up. "I'm not up for this today, Delly. Just leave me alone."

For a moment, she looks as if she might fight back, but I guess it's not worth it. She sits up a little straighter and continues eating. If I'd had any level of success last night, then I could justify my actions; as it was, I can't even fake being proud.

I risk another glance at Peeta, and even though he's not watching me, he's still suppressing a smug expression as he cuts his food. That's it. I'm not going to suffer through a day like this. I'm about to swoon or clutch my stomach or do anything to get me out of the room when a butler comes in. He carries an envelope on a silver platter, and he bows before placing it in front of King Harry.

The king takes the letter and reads it quickly. "Sorry, Agatha, it looks like I'll be leaving within the hour."

"Another problem with the trade agreement?" she asks.

"Yes, I thought we'd settled this months ago. We need to be firm on this one." He stands, setting his napkin on his plate.

The other girls finish their breakfast and excuse themselves to the Women's Room. When it's just Peeta, Esim, and me remaining, I look up at Peeta. We both tug our ears at the same time, then smile. Esim finally leaves, and we meet in the middle, not bothered by the maids and butlers cleaning around us.

I sigh. "You know, Peeta, you might as well send me home. She's only going to get worse, and she's never going to let you pick me." I still haven't told Peeta about how his mother had cornered me, threatening me in the middle of the hall after Peeta talked her into letting me stay. Queen Agatha had made it clear I'm to keep my mouth shut about our conversation, and I don't want to cross him At the same time, I hate keeping it from Peeta. "Besides," I add, crossing my arms, "after last night I can't imagine you're that keen on keeping me anyway."

He bites his lip. "I'm sorry I laughed, but really, what else could I do?"

"I had plenty of ideas," I mutter, still embarrassed at my attempt to seduce him. "I feel so stupid." I bury my head in my hands.

"Stop," he says gently, pulling me in for an embrace. "Trust me when I say, it was very tempting. But you're not that girl."

"But shouldn't I be? Shouldn't that be part of what we are?" I whine into his chest.

"Don't you remember that night in the safe room?" he says, his voice low.

"Yes, but that was basically us saying good-bye."

"It would have been a fantastic good-bye."

I step away and swat him. He laughs, happy to have broken through the uneasiness.

"Let's forget about it," I propose.

"Very well," he agrees. "Besides, we have a project to work on, you and I."

"We do?"

"Yes, since my father is gone, and my mother will be busy with extra things, this will be a convenient time to start brainstorming."

"All right," I say, excited to be part of something that's just between the two of us.

He sighs, making me nervous about what he's planning. "You're right. Mother doesn't approve of you. But she might be forced to bend if we can manage one thing."

"Which is?"

"We have to make you the people's favorite."

I roll my eyes. "That is what we're working on? Peeta, that's never going to happen. I saw a poll in one of Glimmer's magazines after I tried to save Clove. People can hardly stand me."

"Opinions change. Don't let that moment bring you down to much."

I still feel hopeless, but what can I say? If this is my only option, I at least have to try.

"Fine," I say, "But I'm telling you this, it won't work."

With an impish grin on his face, he comes very close and gives me a long, slow kiss. "And I'm telling you it will."