Fourteen and Pregnant

The Good And Bad Of Babies

The rest of the day went slowly, and I continued to feel miserable. When the final bell rang, I felt a lot better.

John drove me home. I kind of dreaded going in because I was still mad at my mom.

When I walked in, she was sitting on the couch.

“Hi honey.”

“Hi.” I didn’t even look at her.

“What’s the matter?”

“You know what’s wrong mom!” I was starting to yell.

“Honey, come here.”

I sat down next to her.

“I did that for your own good.”

“Mom, everyone at school is making fun of me and everyone hates me now.”

“I’m sorry but you’ll get over it.”

“Mom! What the hell is wrong with you?” I yelled.

“What did you just say to me?” She looked angry.

“I said ‘what the hell is wrong with you?’”

“You do not use that language around me! Go to your room and don’t come out until I tell you that you can.”

As I was walking up the stairs, I saw her with her face in her hands and it sounded like she was crying.

Part of me felt bad, but part of me felt good for making her sad.

I went into my room and called Jess.

“Hey Lexi. What’s up?”

“Nothing, I just got sent to my room by my mom.”

“Why?”

“Because I said ‘hell’ in front of her.”

“That’s stupid.”

“I know.”

“Did you need something?” She asked.

“Yeah, a new life.”

“Sorry, I can’t help you with that.” I could tell that she was smiling just by the tone of her voice.

I heard my mom calling me.

“I gotta go. My mother wants me. I’ll call you when I’m done.”

“Ok. Bye.”

I went back downstairs and looked at mom. I could tell that she had been crying because her face was red and puffy and her eyes were bloodshot.

“What?” I asked.

“Sit down.”

I sat.

“Why did you say that to me?”

“Say what?” I was acting stupid and innocent just because I wanted to hear her say it.

“Why did you say ‘what the hell is wrong with you’?”

“Because I was mad.”

“That’s no excuse.” She was really mad at me.

“I’m sorry.”

“No your not.”

“Mom, what is wrong with you? Why are you acting like a completely different person?”

“I’m not! You are.”

“No I’m not. The only thing different about me is that I’m having a baby.”

“Exactly.”

“What?” I didn’t know what she meant.

“You’re having a baby. You’re growing up way too fast and I’m just trying to show you that. I want you to know that things aren’t gonna go your way with a baby. You won’t have any time for yourself. You will be constantly caring for the babies. I just want you to think about that. One is bad enough, but you’re having two.”

“Are you trying to tell me to get rid of my babies?”

“No. That’s not what I said. I just said to think about it.”

“Whatever mom. I’m going up.”

I went back up to my room and thought about what mom said before I called Jess.

“Hey! How’d it go with your mom?”

“Not good. She was telling me crap about how I’m never gonna have any time for myself.”

“Well, that’s kind of true. Babies take a lot of time and attention.”

“Jess, come on, now you sound like my mom.”

“I’m serious. I had to baby sit my newborn cousin one time and I barely had time to sleep.”

“Seriously?” I was more clueless about this than I thought I was.

“Yeah, it’s not easy. Believe me. And if the baby has colic you’re definitely screwed.”

“What’s colic?”

“It’s when the baby just cries and fusses for no apparent reason. Nothing you can do can make them be quiet.”

“What do you think I should do?”

“Well, I think you should keep the babies.”

“But you just told me how hard they are to take care of.”

“I know, but they can be fun too. I mean, they’re your babies. Nobody can take them from you. You’ll always have someone to talk to and they’ll always love you.”

“Yeah, I guess your right. Thanks for talking me into to keeping them.”

“No problem!”

I went back downstairs to tell my mom.

“Mom, I’m keeping the babies whether you like it or not. I don’t care how hard they are to take care of or how much they annoy me. I want to keep them. They’re my babies.”

She smiled.

“Why are you smiling?”

“Because now I know that you want these babies and that you truly love them. I was doubting that.”

“Why?”

“Because your 14. You’re indecisive. But you’ve told me over and over that you want to keep these babies and that you love them. Now I know that you’re positive in your decision.”

“Is that why you told Mr. Jones? Because you were testing me?”

“Yeah, I’m sorry about that.”

“Well, I guess I have to forgive you.”

“Thanks.”

She came over and gave me a hug and I hugged her back.