Saving Grace. [Alex Gaskarth]

More than Anything.

IVORY

"Morning Sweetie."

"Hi." I mumbled, my voice cracking a little.

Three days on and I was numb. No one had managed to get in contact with Alex, meaning for all I knew he had moved on happily, finally free from the burden that was myself. I spend the past three days crying, curled up in the corner of the shop sobbing. I hadn't gone to school, I hadn't worked, I hadn't eaten I hadn't done anything. 

I couldn't lose him, and somewhere in my mind I thought maybe he would come back and forgive me. Everyone tried to convince me it wasn't my fault, but I knew it was. If I had only listened to him, gone back to his when he told me too, this wouldn't have happened. Jack's feelings wouldn't have surfaced and he would have found another girl worthy of his love. 

"You want anything Ivory-G?" Matt asked, crouching down to my level. 

"No, thanks." I whispered, not trusting my voice. 

He sighed sadly, sitting down next to me and pulling me onto his lap sideways. I curled up against him, resting my head in his neck. I had always been closer to Taylor, because I knew him first, but Matt was always more understanding. Taylor had been angry at Alex for leaving me, Matt had stayed by my side and comforted me. 

"Did you sleep any better last night?" He asked into my hair. 

I shook my head no, squeezing my eyes shut to stop the tears. I was staying with Matt and Taylor at their apartment, I couldn't bring myself to go home, to sleep in the bed Alex had claimed me his and spent so many in. Perhaps the only good thing that had come of this was Chelsea, she had been genuinely worried when I didn't come home the first night, and had hugged me when she found me crying at Hazel's with Taylor's help.

"I think we should go out." Matt declared. 

"No, thanks." I repeated quietly. 

"Please darling, for me?" He pleaded, catching the attention of Taylor. 

"No." I shrugged, shuffling off his lap and padding into the office. 

I tugged the sleeves of my sweatshirt over my hands and wiped my eyes, cursing myself for crying again. I wanted to stop, I didn't want to be this dependant on him, but just got it. He understood me, he loved me, he knew everything about me, more than my own mother knew. It wasn't the fact he'd left me that made me cry, I was convinced he'd get tired of me at some point, but it was the situation that caused him to leave that made me cry. He'd lost his band, his best friend over something as stupid as me, I was to blame. 

"Ivory, you have a visitor lovely." Taylor said softly, noticing my tears.

"Hello poppet." Mr Farmer's smiled.

"Uncle A." I sobbed, running over to him and engulfing him in a hug. 

"Hey hey hey no tears." He sighed, wiping away the moisture on my cheeks. 

"I missed you." I cried, hugging him tighter. 

"I missed you sweet girl, now let's go somewhere and talk eh?" He suggested. 

I sniffed and nodded, tucking myself under his arm as we left the shop. We walked for a while until we reached the park, he pushed the gate open and led me to a bench, it was quiet out, nothing but a few dog walkers, but it still made me uneasy. He took a seat next to me and we sat in silence for a few moments.

"He hasn't be in school y'know?" He said quietly. 

"No?" I whispered.

"Haven't heard from him, he called in sick the first day, but he's been missing these past two." 

"Oh." I said quietly. 

"You miss him?" He asked. 

"More than anything." I said quickly.

"Taylor told me what happened, so I spoke to Rian." He said.

"What?" I gasped. 

"Rian said he spoke to Alex, and he's a wreck like you, he's just been sat alone crying. His parents back in England and all." He shrugged. 

"And it's all my fault." I said, my voice cracking. 

"You should go see him, talk him down, work this out." He suggested. 

"He hates me." I cried softly. 

"Far from it Ivory-G, I've seen the way that boy looks at you, the way he was when you were missing, the way he was when you weren't talking to him, how happy he was when he got you back. Ivory he's madly in love with you." 

"Not possible." I whispered, casting my eyes down. 

"Go to him Ivory, work this out." He said softly.

"Why? So I can break his heart again? I'm not good enough Uncle A!" I shouted.

"That's why he's crying eh? Because he doesn't want you? Is that what you think?" He said.

"I know it." I mumbled sadly.

"Please go talk to him, knock on his door and just see. If he pushes you away you were right, continue to be sad, but if he doesn't, work it out, talk to him." He pleaded.

"I can't do it." I said, my voice cracking. 

"Yes you ca--"

"I can't have him reject me again! I can't walk up to his knowing he's going to push away, knowing I'm about to lose him forever!" I shouted, tears streaming down my cheeks. 

"Do it for Hazel Ivory, what would she say?" He said sternly.

My mouth fell agape and my tears stopped. I clutched my necklace and looked up at the sky, waiting for the sign. My mother wouldn't have wanted this, she fought through everything for Dad, and what was I doing? Crying and giving up.

"Will you drive me?"

A/N: I'm sorry if this is sad, I'm just not feeling too well :/ 

My friend Rhyana_Shah is writing me a little one-shot story type thing which you should go check out. It's called 'The Coffee that changed my Life' and it's really sweet :') 

Thank you for the ongoing support as always, I love you all(: <3