Fangs and Other Fairy Tales (A Camren Fanfic)

Chapter 11

I was now determined more than ever to get better. Yesterday I had borrowed a pen and paper from Lauren and wrote down a strict regime for myself, Lauren would make sure I didn't push it too far but otherwise she made sure most of my recovery would be in my own hands. My leg was feeling a lot better and I could finally take off that stupid cast on my arm that was weighing me down even more, as a whole I was feeling a lot better physically and I could add emotionally to that list after laying everything out the other day. Even though it wasn't particularly fun for anybody to hear, it had to be done and I feel a lot better with everyone being in the know. Now there are no more secrets between us, everything has been said and done, and I don't feel as guilty as I did before about my stand off-ish disposition toward Vampires. They knew I had a good reason for feeling the way that I do and don't take it personally, I made it very clear I was overly fond of each and every one of them and didn't see them as the vicious monsters in my dreams.

My talk with Mike and Lily really helped me clear up a lot of the mixed feelings I was having, and things don't seem as catastrophic as they did before. Keeping it all pent up inside really isn't good for anyone; it just eats away at you until you lash out at others or worse, do something stupid to yourself. If you're going to listen to a voice make sure your second opinion isn't the voice in your head telling you how worthless you are and how much you screwed up, make sure it's someone who loves you and cares about you; most of the time they know what's best and what's going to help you in the long run.

After breakfast this morning Lauren told me I could go through her wardrobe to look for something practical to wear which I appreciated; going for another pair of sweats and a tank top, and slipped them on before getting Lauren to help me downstairs. I made my way outside while the older girl went off to hunt for her own breakfast, Taylor offered to stay behind to make sure I didn't break anything else but I insisted she go too. This was going to be embarrassing enough without an audience; I'm not nearly as strong as I used to be and would rather not have the extra pressure on me to do well. I began doing a few simple stretches first on a soft patch of grass to loosen myself up, and then got ready to do a short run to get the strength back in my leg. That seemed like the most important thing at the moment, as much as I appreciated being carried around like a princess I couldn't help but also feel like a tiny child. I decided to run to the cliff side that I had reached before since it was a fair distance away at my human pace and see how well I did with that.

I started off towards the woods after jumping across the small stream via the stepping stones, and felt pretty good about myself for not falling on my face already. I made it about quarter of the way without any problems at all, despite the slight twitch in my leg it wasn't painful like it was before, but I slowly started to tire. My stamina was all but drained after doing nothing but sitting still for so many years, however I kept going determined to at least make it halfway before giving up. It felt nice to run again since for the past couple of days I've either been falling on my butt, my face or unconscious so this was a nice change of pace. I wish I could change into my Werewolf form and run full force but I knew that wouldn't be the best idea, I had come so far I wasn't going to be the cause of yet another setback. One day though, I'll be able to change and run so fast through these woods that not even Taylor could keep up, I'd leave them all in the dust and show them what a real Werewolf could do.

I hate how it's only in my nightmares that I'm reminded how strong and fearsome I used to be, when I took on a group of Vampires. I wouldn't say I lost, but I was broken. They played a cruel game of fear and manipulation, where do you find the motivation to get back up when you've lost everything in a few short moments. I knew I could be the old me as long as I kept trying, kept fighting and remembered why I was doing this. I was going to be better, be stronger and this time I was going to protect the people I loved. I wasn't going to lose anyone else, when you're a girl who has nothing, the second you do find something worth holding onto you grip it tight with both hands. Just like Clara had promised nothing bad was going to happen to me, I wanted to make her the same promise that nothing bad was going to happen to her or her family either.