Enemies With Benefits

EWB 40

OMG don't come at me! We aint done yet lmao

Caleb

I...

I don't know what to feel. 

Or what to say.

I was frozen on my spot.

As soon as Hailey pulled out of the kiss, she stood frozen and kind of shocked as she looked at me, waiting for the kiss to register in her head for a couple of seconds before she started walking away.

I wanted to call out her name, but honestly I just didn't know what to say so I just watched her walk away.

Until the haze wore off, and slowly, I felt my cheek rise and a huge grin on my mouth forms.

OMG she kissed me! She really kissed me!

If I wasn't in public right now I would GIGGLE THE FUCK OUT! HOLY SHIT!

I took a deep breath to calm myself down and try to chill the fuck out.

Shit tho. Hailey really kissed me!

Don't get me wrong, I was still confused as hell, but there was nothing else on my mind right now other than the kiss.

I started walking back to my place, completely giddy as hell it felt like my heart was about to pop out of my chest.

My fingers unconsciously went up to my lips, and one touch made me feel exactly how I felt at that moment. 

And the more I let my mind wander about it, the more... confused and worried I got.

What did that even mean? 

I mean, her kissing me. What does that mean? 

She did it while I was telling her that I still loved her, so could it be that she... still felt the same about me? That whatever feelings she had for me... was still there? Or was it back?

I have never been this confused before, to be honest.

And I didn't wanna stress myself out tonight so I decided I'd just go to bed.

And have that kiss replay in my mind for the rest of the night.

Come next morning. 

It was all I thought about the whole night until I fell asleep, and it was the first thought that entered my mind as soon as I woke up.

The more I thought about it, however, the more I realized that me and Hailey needed to talk about it some point. Like, we really really do.

Then I started to think about what I want.

What if she wanted us to be together? Do I want that for us too?

I mean, shit, of course I do. That should not even be a question.

But can I promise that I wouldn't hurt her again... now that is the real question.

I start picking my phone up, and start fiddling my fingers thinking about what to type, but every time I get the guts to text her, the thought of me hurting her again would make me hold back.

Well, that, and, what else am I supposed to say really?

The same thing happened over and over again for the whole day, until I realized that it was already nighttime and I absolutely got nothing done. 

Not any of my work, not texting Hailey and asking to talk, nothing.

The same thing happened on Sunday.