𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐋 𝐌𝐄

Chapter 29: Forbidden

Misha

Yes, Blondie it was meant for you, the feelings I have for you how much I love and crave it but fucking despise them, if I could be yours blondie, I couldn't bare myself letting you fall for a monster like me.

I've begged for forgiveness, for all the blood I spilled, for all the sins I made and been hiding from everyone, the guilt I feel knowing you're falling for me and I am too, I can't bare myself with it. It's eating us alive Blondie.

And once I touch you, feel you, take your innocents, you'll be ruined, destroyed and you'll have to live that with the rest of your life, oh how much your life has changed ever since I came back Blondie.

I should have never come back, everything would have been different, You would be happy with your family, I would be in my whole of guilt and trauma while you were happy, and If I could reverse time, I would simply not have come back and forget about this life.

And start my new one, where you didn't exist in it, where you were safe and happy when you didn't know you lived with a cold-hearted killer. If I hadn't come back everything would be different for you.

"Blair, get some sleep."

Blair

It was fucking 8 p.m nowhere near my bedtime, but I watched as Misha paced into the last door down the hall and slammed it shut, tears falling down my cheek as I stood alone in the dark in pure silence with the city lights heading me.

I looked down the hall and entered the first room, a guest bedroom, I shut the door behind me and collapsed to the ground, I placed my head down on my knees while my arms wrapped around my legs.

I wanted to cry my eyes out, but I couldn't I was tired of crying for men, for my father for Rune now for Misha, I nearly got murdered a couple of hours ago and now I'm on the floor wanting to cry but having no tears left in me.

then suddenly the door knob twists, "Blair what are you doing?" "What?" I quickly stood up running a hand through my hair as Misha tried slamming the door open, "Misha stop-" Before I could finish my sentence or open the fucking door Misha slammed through the wooden door breaking the doorknob.

"What are-" he then ran up to me and grasped both my hands and started looking around my body, "Misha-" "What were you doing?" he grunted, "What nothing!" I shout as his facial expressions relaxed, "You-You thought I was burning?"

His silence spoke for me, I scoff and try pushing him out the door but end up hurting my palm instead, "Fuck!" I whine, he rolls his eyes and grasps my hand "Stop you fucking idiot" I try slapping him but he grasped my other wrist and pulled me into his chest.

His face hovering down at me like a god ready to send me to death, "You broke my door" "Sucks for you" He quickly replied, "Your sleeping in my room" I scowl in confusion as he let go one of my hands and dragged me out the room.

"Why?!" I try to fight, "Because I don't trust you" Of course, of course, he doesn't fucking trust me, but I didn't know if he meant by leaving or by...burning even tho I had no lighter in my hands. "Plus I broke the door" I roll my eyes as he pulled me into his room slamming the door shut behind me.

"Here" Suddenly a black cloth gets tossed into my face, I roll my eyes and remove it from my face and see it's an oversized black t-shirt.

The intoxicating scent of clone- I turned to look at Misha and realize he was in black sweatpants and has given me his shirt, he looks up at me and arches a brow "Your wearing jeans and a crop top I think you'll be very much uncomfortable"

I gulp as he turned around, I slip my crop top off and pull the t-shirt over my head, Slipping my jeans off me and folding them placing them on the bench beside the bed, "Done" I said spinning around to see him turn to me.

His eyes roam my legs and body very slowly, I felt as if he was eating me up just with his eyes. "Okay" He nodded heading toward the bed, I do the same and make sure I'm not even an inch of his touch.

The silence bubbled into me, the awkwardness of just staring up at the ceiling while Misha fucking Larson laid beside me.

It was eating me alive, I couldn't resist the urge to just "Misha"  I say, "What" he snapped, I sigh and turn my head to look at him, both his arms crossed on the back of his head, while he stared up at the ceiling.

"What did the song mean, the one you wrote...for me" I could sense the tension between us grow and sweat building in my back.

"Forbidden"
"What?" I frown in confusion
"Forbidden Love" I gulped so harshly my throat hurt.

"Oh" was the only thing I could let out, I didn't even try to hide the disappointment in my voice as I glanced back at the ceiling, after what felt like centuries of silence he spoke up.

"What were you going to tell me the..." he cut himself off not finishing his sentence, "That night" I knew exactly what night.

I wanted to lie and say I said it in the moment, but that was a huge lie, just say Blair, "I don't know..."

"Oh-"
"How? But every moment we spent together, I- I think I started catching feelings, and even tho I didn't want to admit it, those feelings grew bigger" He stayed silent and I slowly waited for the hurtful rejection.

"All I've ever done was hurt, you Blair"
I let out a breath and shut my eyes.

"I would rather let you hurt me a hundred times than...lose you, Misha"