the morning of the wedding was calmful. sipping hot chocolate and munching on biscuits while feeling that cold breeze in the living room with hwasa is all that i wanted for the morning wedding.
both hwasa and i woke up around 8 am and decided to wash up and then chill while waiting for the production team or whoever comes.
"ah, i'm so nervous", i mumbled as i sip my hot chocolate. hwasa giggled.
"mia, there is only 150 people who will be attending your wedding. not seventy thousand people", she said, comparing to my wedding and my concert.
"yah, that's the thing. that's the problem. see, i'm used to large, huge crowds and now, i can't stand in front of a small crowd because i can see like all their faces", i said and cupped my face.
hwasa laughed.
"mia, you know all these people who are coming to your wedding. you shouldn't be nervous, sweetie", hwasa said.
"oh god. this is driving me nuts", i mumbled as cupped my face and chuckled. hwasa put her head on my shoulder.
"you're not gonna leave me alone even after you're married, right?" hwasa asked. i chuckled.
"of course, no. i'm still going to be there for you. don't worry", i patted her thigh as i lean my head on hers that was on my shoulder.
a few seconds of silence, i asked, "do you think i'll be a good wife to seokjin?"
"he wouldn't propose to you if he doesn't think you can be a good wife", hwasa replied.
"i just get a feeling that i am not a good mother neither a good girlfriend, fiancée or wife", i said.
"yeonnie, you're the most caring and humble person i've ever met and you're my dongsaeng. you've been in seoul since you were 11 years old and now, you are 24 years old, international age," hwasa said.
"i've known you for 13 years and you are really kind. you are the best friend i could ever asked for and you are perfect in my eyes and your fans. you have all that people want",
"you paved the way especially for asian women to go to western countries. you won the grammy once and that was amazing. you were the first asian woman to win that thing",
"you're just thinking a lot. you're doing great. so great", hwasa said, patting my arm, supporting me.
i exhaled and smiled. i will try my best to do my job as a wife and a mother of two.
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as soon as i walked out of my bedroom to change into the wedding dress, the people in my hotel suite gasp and squeal with joys. i grinned as i slowly walked towards the living room.
there were some production team who got this on camera. i chuckled as the staff and family members awed as i walked to the living room.
"you look so beautiful!" they said. i smiled.
"look at you, you're getting married. i'm gonna tear up", ahreum said. the others laughed.
"hajima", i pouted, didn't want any tears on my wedding day.
"you look so much like your mother, mia", eomma said. i chuckled and smiled.
"she really does", my aunt said. i just smile.
"you look really beautiful, mia. oh my god", hwasa said, tidying my wedding gown.
"are you wearing heels?" ahreum asked.
"nope. jin didn't want me to wear heels", i said, pulling up my wedding dress to show my white flat comfy wedding shoes.
"wow, that looks beautiful too. minimal and beautiful", ahreum said.
"yeah", i nodded in agreement.
"well, jin will be whipped when he saw you in these", hwasa said.
"he has already whipped for her since the first time he saw mia", ahreum replied and we laughed.
"he has already fallen in love like crazy ever since first time meeting her", eomma added. i chuckled.
"annyeonghaseyo", i heard a familiar voice.
i turn to look at the door and saw enhypen and txt coming in. they gasped and shrieked in happiness and awed when they saw me.
"oh my god!" they squealed. i grinned.
"hi boys", i greeted them.
"you look so beautiful!" they said.
"yah, i'm not the groom but i feel like i want to tear up", jay said. we laughed.
"what are you guys doing here? seeing me?" i asked them as i walked towards the dressing table.
"nae. after this, we're going to bts-hyung's suite", they replied.
"ah~ you guys came so early", i said.
"we need to discuss with bts-hyung for something. they asked us to come earlier", soobin said.
"ah~, alright", i nodded.
we talked a few more minutes while eojin retouched my makeup and my hair. the dress was honestly heavy but i wanted it because it was beautiful and i love it, obviously.
we took a few photos before the boys left my hotel suite to go to bts' suite that was at the end of the same floor of my hotel suite too.
i look into the mirror and look at my reflection. honestly, it's hard to breathe knowing that you are going to be a wife to one of the members of bangtansonyeondan.
since seokjin and i are also popular in korean pop industry, there will be constant attention from the public that we have to face all the time.
jae-hyuk told me just now that the entrance of the hotel was crowded with fans and paparazzi. some even tried to enter from the back door and purposely check into the hotel.
that's why right now, the security team is busy securing the ballroom, my hotel suite and the boys' hotel suite. making sure that there are no fans in disguise trying to sneak in.
i wished my parents are here today to see me get married and walk me down my aisle. i look at my hands and adjust the thin ring that i purposely wear on my index finger.
my ring finger i emptied because a new ring will be placed on my ring finger which is the wedding ring.
"mia, let's have a solo photoshoot first before we go to the bridal room", the production team director said.
"ah, nae. sure", i nodded.
i was given my bouquet that isaac, our florist custom made for me on my wedding day. it's a gem. there are jewels in the center of each white roses. the arrangement of the bouquet was really delicate.
anyway, i had a 15 minutes photoshoot in the living room and the bedroom. after the photoshoot, all of us head towards the bridal room which was at the same level as the ballroom.
we use the back corridor to go to the bridal room because, there are some people at the entrance of the ballroom already. if we use the usual way to the bridal room, we need to pass the ballroom. so, we use the other way round so that the invitees won't see me before the wedding ceremony starts and only see me when they come to the bridal room to see me.
when we reached the bridal room, big hit's production team for photographing was already in the bridal room with camera stands. as what bang si-hyuk promised, we didn't find any other production crew because he lent us help with production team. everything is free. yeah, like really free. from filming, photoshoot and everything that is dealing with cameras and microphones.
i sat on the bench that was provided near the white backdrop behind me. the bridal room was decorated already with white flowers. it was beautiful and really have the vibe of wedding.
"we'll have a short interview first before letting your guests come to meet you. is that okay?" the camera director asked. i nodded quickly.
"nae. sure", i replied while hwasa was tidying my dress. laying out the dress properly and tidily.
hwasa sat together with eojin and some other staff at the side of the bridal room. as long as they didn't appear in the camera and recording it's fine.
"we'll clap the clapperboard and start recording. can you clap like the clapperboard?", the director said.
"nae", i said and clapped my hands like clapping on and on.
the staff and director giggled.
"not like that", the director said. i grinned.
"mianhae. i just need a good laugh because i'm so nervous. nae. start", i said before clapping my hands once.
"how do you feel getting married at the age of 25 years old?" the director asked.
"epic", i replied and grinned.
"average people in korea get married at 30 years old but i'm five years earlier. so, i guess i'm the odd one. but jin is already 33 years old. so, that's still average", i said and chuckled.
"what's your hope for your marriage?"
"that it will be forever even until we die. i want the love stays forever. thousand, millions, billions and trillions and infinity years", i replied and smiled.
"how do feel about this wedding?"
"ever since i think about wedding, i always say that i want a private wedding and i don't want my wedding to be huge and really extravagant. this wedding is perfect",
"with only close friends and family attending, it feels more memorable and precious. i could spend more time with the people who i know will be there, supporting my relationship with my fiancé", i replied.
"what would you do if your parents are here today?"
i chuckled and hummed.
"well, they will be walking me down the aisle. so, i bet that there will be sad and happy tears. i'm pretty sure. but if they are here today, i would be very happy", i said and nodded.
"how much do you love seokjin?"
"mwo? is this a question too?" i laughed and cupped my mouth. the director nodded.
"well, i love him more than my own life. i would do anything to keep him safe and sound. i would die for him. i would. i honestly would die for him",
"like really die for him. i love him so much. it's proven. we have two sons. our twins. well, yeah. i love him more than myself. i can't describe it", i said and chuckled.
"say something to your fans, roses and also seokjin's fans, armys",
i smiled and chuckled.
"first of all, roses. i am really grateful to have you guys. thank you so much for supporting me all the time especially with my relationship. thank you so much. i will keep on loving you guys. you are the best. you are consistent and that's why i love you guys so much. thank you",
"armys, thank you for supporting our relationship. i promise you guys to take care of jin and not hurt his feelings. i will try my best to take care of him and make him happy. i will love him and care for him. we will have a happy marriage and thank you for accepting me into the family. saranghae juseyo! (please love me.)" i said and make a huge love with my arms, over my head and grinned.
a few minutes later after several more questions, the interview ended and wedding guests starts to enter my bridal room and had a chat with me or take pictures with me.
it was fun. meeting friends who i had not meet for so long. most of the wedding guests were friends and just some family members. for jin's family and my family, we just provide three tables. since my side family, only four people came. just my aunts and uncles.
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"eomma!" i heard the twin's voice. i squealed when i saw jun-ha and jun-seo running towards me. they were already in their black suits. so handsome like their appa.
i squatted and they ran to me. i hugged them tightly and laughed seeing them with their black bow ties and black trousers. so cute.
"omo! mia!" i heard jimin's voice. i look up and saw the bts members were standing at the door in awe and cupping their mouth. i grinned.
"wah, you guys dress up smartly. this is nice", i grinned as i stood up.
"you look so pretty! oh my god", jimin said, approaching me. i grinned.
"you're so beautiful", j-hope said. i grinned with all the compliments that i was receiving.
"jin-hyung will so tear up looking at you. i'm even tearing up!", jimin said, cupping her mouth. tears were in his eyes. i laughed and hugged him.
"uljima. don't cry. if you cry, i will cry too!" i said, hugging jimin and he hugged me back.
"mia, you look so beautiful. like, really beautiful. so different and elegant", taehyung said.
"aww, gomapda", i said as i broke the hug with jimin. he was sniffling. a little teary.
"hajima. uljima. if you cry, i'm gonna cry too", i said, hitting jimin's shoulder. he chuckled.
"yah, jungkook is crying", rm said. i shoot my head towards jungkook. he was cupping his face.
"aigoo! uljima! don't ruin your makeup. i don't want to ruin my makeup too. god, jungkook! you'll make me cry too!" i whined as i pulled him for a hug.
he put his head on my shoulder and sobbed.
"jungkook-ah! wae? why are you crying! oh my goodness!" i said, holding back my tears as i hear jungkook's sob on my shoulder.
"jin-hyung chose the best woman to be his wife and i can tell that your marriage will remain forever", namjoon said. i chuckled and thanked him as i rubbed jungkook's back.
"wae!? why is everyone here crying! oh my god! don't cry! no! uljima!" i shouted as i saw j-hope and jimin has teary eyes. the staff were also tearing up.
"mia, you promise that you won't unlove jin-hyung", jungkook said, breaking our hug.
"i promise. i promise that i will take care and love your hyung. don't worry, he will still go to your dorm sometimes. it's not that he won't go to your dorm anymore", i said i wiped jungkook's tears from his cheeks. he nodded and chuckled as i wipe his tears.
a staff gave me a tissue and i patted it under jungkook's eyes.
"uljima. i'm tearing up too", i said, sniffling. jungkook chuckled and hugged me.
"you're a good woman. please take care of jin-hyung. he's my bestfriend and i can call him my brother. he means a lot to me and i care for him as much as i care for you too", jungkook said while hugging me.
"i will. i will take care of him, jungkook. i know. don't worry", i said, patting his back before we broke the hug. jimin and the other boys hugged me too.
we were all tearing up. i was tearing up too when they asked and begged me to really take care of jin. i know jin means a lot to them since they have been together as a group more than 10 years already.
seeing one of their members get married after years together and being together through ups and downs may be overwhelming. not that it's sad but it's happy tears that their member already grown up and already have a family of their own.
when i break the hug between me and suga, i was tearing up already. single tear came running down my cheeks. i chuckled as hwasa lends me a tissue. i patted it under my eyes and smiled.
"i won't break my promise. you can kill me if i break my promise", i said to the boys. they nodded and smiled.
"we'll go out first. jin will come in next", rm said.
"nae. i'll meet you guys later", i smiled.
"nae. annyeong", they said before exiting the bridal room.
"argh, i'm gonna cry so much", i said, cupping my face.
"yah, yah, don't cry!" hwasa said. i exhaled and look up, holding back my tears.
eojin patted some compact powder under my eyes and on my nose. while waiting for jin, i talked to the twins. they are already 2/3 years old this year. they can understand most situation already. so, they are most of the time ask something that they want to know especially now. they ask what is wedding. what is happening and everything else.
"mia, jin is coming", a staff told.
"ah, nae. what should i do?" i asked, raising my eyebrows and look at the staff. they giggled.
"we will blindfold him when you two are already facing each other, we will open his blindfold", the staff explained to me.
"ah, okay, okay", i nodded and chuckled.
"alright twins. come here", hwasa said, calling the twins over to her. the twins went to her after she called.
i took my bouquet that is on the bench and then eojin and my hairstylist tidy my hair and retouch my makeup a little. this is a must because jin will be seeing me for the first time in a wedding dress and it's my wedding dress and he never saw the wedding dress before. this is the first look.
only production crew was in the bridal room for the first look. the others were politely asked to leave the room for the production crew to have a recording of this special moment.
a few minutes later, the staff brings jin into the room. i look at him as he walks into the bridal room and nagging why he must be blindfolded. i chuckled and shook my head.
he was asked to stand in front of me. maybe two meters away from me. even though i couldn't see his eyes, he dressed up smartly. with a black bow tie. he's perfect.
"alright. jin-ssi, are you ready?" the director asked.
"nae", jin replied. i smiled and stood still in front of him. i'm nervous how he will react.
"you can open your blindfold now", the staff said.
jin open his blindfold and his eyes. he looked at me and then my dress. i just grin while closing my face with the huge bouquet i was holding.
i look at jin and he was grinning. no words were spoken. i was already scared that he didn't like the dress i was wearing.
"jinnie?" i mumbled. he looked at me and i saw his teary eye.
"jinnie", i said in awe and approached him. he pulled me for a hug and i hugged him back.
he just hugged me without words. i didn't say anything too. no words can describe this moment. it was overwhelming and euphoric. we're getting married. that's all.
"yeonnie", he said while looking at me and then my dress.
"nae", i replied as i wiped his tears from his face and smiled blandly.
"you're the most beautiful woman i've ever seen in my whole life. no one could ever replace you and i love you so much", he said before hugging me again.
"aw, thank you, jinnie. i love you too. and you're the most handsome man i've ever seen in my life after chris evan", i said. he broke the hug and look at me in disbelief.
i laughed and cupped my mouth.
"seriously?" he asked.
"aniyo", i replied and laughed. love to tease him. he chuckled and then hugged me tightly.
"god, i wanna squeeze you so bad. you're so beautiful and cute", he said, hugging me tightly.
"can't breathe!" i said, pushing him away. he laughed and loosen our hug.
"this dress is beautiful. paired up with a beautiful woman, it's a dynamite", he said. i laughed and playfully hit his chest. he chuckled.
"you look handsome too. this suit is nice!" i said, caressing his suit. it was smooth and the color was really plain and beautiful. it was smart.
after a few moments, we have a photoshoot together just the two of us and then together with the twins. this is the officially family photo.
i sat on the bench with jun-seo while seokjin was standing behind me, holding my shoulders and jun-ha sitting on the floor just right beside my legs. another official photoshoot, seokjin and i sat on the bench together and we carried jun-seo and jun-ha on our lap.
after that, we got ready for the wedding ceremony. jin will march in first. namjoon who is the officiant will be at the stage and he don't need to walk down the aisle.
only jin, the twins and i will walk down the aisle since we are the main cast in this wedding. lmao, main cast in the wedding. hahahaha.
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the ballroom was silent. only camera clicks and namjoon's voice filled the ballroom.
"alright, we'll move on to the vows", namjoon said.
i smiled while looking at jin. my hands were shaking and i know jin realize that because he squeezed my hands. i chuckled.
"we'll have kim seokjin to say his vows while putting on the wedding ring first", namjoon said before he put the microphone in front of jin's lips.
jimin gave the wedding ring to jin and jin took my hands. i smiled and look at him. he looked at me and smiled. everything at this point was sincerity and faith and love and romance.
"song seo-yeon, i vow to love you faithfully, forsaking others. i promise to love, to trust and to respect you", jin said while putting the ring in my ring finger. i smiled.
"to comfort you in times of need, and keep you safe. all that i have is now yours. i give you my hand and my heart for as long as we both shall live", he caressed my hands gently while looking directly into my eyes. i got teary a little bit hearing him saying it with sincerity and love.
i smiled and nodded. hwasa gave me the ring that i will place on jin's ring finger. i decided to put the ring to his finger first before saying my vows. namjoon holds the microphone in front of my lips.
"kim seokjin...", i said and hold his hands. he smiled and look at me.
"i vow to be your faithful partner. in sickness and in health. i promise to love you unconditionally. to honor and to respect you. to bring solace in times of need", i vowed. he smiles.
"i promise to cherish you, as long as we both shall live", i said and smiled.
jin smiled and i know he was happy because he holds my hands tightly and smiles widely.
"with both bride and groom's vows, i now pronounce you, husband and wife. you may kiss the bride", namjoon said. i smiled and look down.
seokjin took the end of my veil and tidily folded the veil until up over my head. most of our male friends started to tease when jin took a lot of time to put the veil over my head to reveal my face.
i just laughed. when jin had already put the veil over my head, the boys tease again since it's time for jin to kiss me. i put the bouquet in front of my face and laughed.
"alright, jin-hyung. she's all yours", jimin who was standing a little further from namjoon said.
jin smiles while looking at me.
"jamsi manyo. can i do something first?" i asked.
"mwo?" namjoon asked.
i look at the audience and then squealed in excitements as i stomped my feet on the stage like i was running but in the same place. i was really nervous and excited. the audience laughed and cheered.
"he's gonna kiss me! argh!!!" i squealed in excitements and waving my bouquet in the air.
the laughs and cheers get louder. while i was laughing, jin pulled me and then kissed me. i laughed and wrapped my arms around his neck. the audience cheered and clapped together.
"you're so cute", jin whispered after we kissed. i chuckled and hugged him.
"ladies and gentlemen! i introduce to you our newly wedded, mr and mrs kim!" namjoon said.
the guests cheered and clapped. seokjin and i face to the guests and i cling my arms around his arms and we walked down the stairs, walking down the aisle.
the audience threw flowers as we walked on the aisle. seokjin and i waved towards them with a huge smile. we're finally married.
the wedding ceremony continued with photographs while the hotel staff get the food tray ready in every round table.
took photo with family. eomma, appa, seokjung, ahreum, ji-na, jun-ha, jun-seo, seokjin and i. this is my new family. my in-laws, my niece and my sons.
we took photos with friends and other families. my mother's side family that came all the way from malaysia and to bless my relationship with seokjin. they were happy.
when it was time for seokjin and i took photo with bts members, seven of them carried me facing the camera. yes, they literally just carry me. seven of them and it was funny.
it was funny of course. we took a lot of photos with big hit's family. there were some staff who we invited. bang si-hyuk and some of the board members also came.
so, we have one photo session where it includes everyone who works under big hit entertainment. so, everyone joins. bts, enhypen, txt, jae-hyuk, aria, all big hit staff who came, security team and the production crew. seokjin and i at the center. enhypen and txt sat on the floor in front of us because the stage stairs couldn't hold up all of us.
it was very, very euphoric. everything at this point is happiness.
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the ballroom was filled with laughter and chatters. i walked from table to table together with jin, talking with family members and friends. we took some photos together.
jin and i had already ate before the wedding ceremony. so, we didn't mind not eating during this wedding ceremony. we just have fun and let our guest eat.
we moved to the next round table and i was greeted and congratulated by our friends.
"congratulations, mia", lisa, former blackpink member said as she hugged me.
"aw, gomapda eunnie. thank you for coming too. you were so busy but still have time to come. thank you", i hugged her back and smiled.
"you're welcome. i bought you some present from thailand. i gave it to the receptionist outside this ballroom. they were taking presents and gifts", she said. i nodded.
"alright. thank you", i said and patted her shoulder.
"mia! jin-hyung! chukhaimnida!" bambam congratulate us. i chuckled and shake his hand like a bro shake like how we always do. i grinned and thanked him.
"thanks. thank you for coming even though you guys have a tight schedule now", i said.
"yeah. that's why youngjae, jaebeom and mark couldn't come", jackson said.
"ah~, it's fine. at least there are representative", jin replied. i nodded and smiled.
we talked together for a while before heading to the next table luckily it was just 15 tables. even 15 tables i thinks are quite tiring. luckily i was wearing flat shoes and it really helps.
bts, txt and enhypen all perform songs individually. i mean, follow their group. bts performed best of me. jin joined too. txt and enhypen sang one of their song that is about love and it was so nice.
bts performed best of me because they know that the song is my favorite song. until now, if you ask me what's my favorite bts song, it's still best of me. that's a masterpiece that was produce with the chainsmokers. it's amazing.
txt and enhypen did a surprise for me. they created a video of txt and enhypen with jin and i. there were videos and photographs too. it was sweet. a little overwhelming. they also did a speech telling how they are so happy that jin and i are already married.
jungkook gave a speech as a representative of bts and hwasa gave a speech as my sister. as my cousin, sister, bestfriend and colleague. and yes, iu came together with her husband. i wished i had a lot of time with her but she will depart back to canada tomorrow afternoon. i promised her that i will go to canada to visit her after her baby is born and she agreed with it.
jungkook gave a heartwarming speech. it was so sweet. his speech shows that he's still bts' maknae and he's the cutest. hwasa also gave a heartwarming speech. she talks about how she watched me grow up and went through a lot of life difficulties and how i manage and how my relationship with jin was before we had the twins. it was sweet. i teared up a little.
seokjin and i gave a speech after they gave theirs. we thanked family, friends and our fans who has been there, supporting and loving us all the time and how we are grateful that we are finally married. we're both super happy to start a new life as husband and wife and we ask that everyone will pray for our marriage will remain forever.
as a surprise for jin, i played the grand piano while singing. the grand piano was pushed to the center of the dance floor. the song i wrote a few weeks after jin proposed me and i promised myself to sing it on our wedding day. i wrote it, produced it together with namjoon. so, i credit him for the lyrics too. the title of the song is lover.
i played the piano like chords while i sing. there is another accompaniment which is strings instruments. i already set it up and send it to jae-hyuk and he helped me to give it to the sound system crew who operate the microphones and all the electronics. i will be releasing this song officially on spotify and i dedicate this song to my husband, kim seokjin.
the one that i perform now is the first dance remix. i have an original version. i will release four tracks for this single maybe tomorrow or on friday. the original version, first dance remix and then two instrumentals for both versions. of course, my fans could use these instrumental for themselves. that's why i will release the instrumentals. for them. and for memories that i ever produce a song for my husband.
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"mrs kim?" i heard seokjin's voice while i was looking at hwasa who was talking with namjoon.
i turned towards his voice and smiled. "that's me", i replied.
"yes, you", he replied as he pecked my lips. i smiled.
"let's get out of here. i'm tired of sharing you here", he said, wrapping his arms around my waist.
i chuckled and said, "i need to change",
he looked at my dress and back at me. "okay. be quick", he said. i chuckled.
"okay", i mumbled.
i peck his lips before i leave the ballroom with jae-hyuk and some other staff. i went to the restroom and change my dress into something simpler but still shows that i am the bride for the night.
eojin and my other stylist team retouched my makeup and hair before i head back to the ballroom. this time, i am more casual but more formal. i wear a pointy toe heels while holding my bouquet.
i have more wide range movement after changing to a simple outfit. jae-hyuk told me while we were going back to the ballroom that my things have already been packed and there's nothing left in the hotel suite anymore. i smiled and thanked him.
going back to the ballroom, some guests starts to leave and so jin and i have to leave the hotel and head back to my apartment. we're not staying in the hotel tonight. we're more comfortable going back.
so, jin and i announced our departure. since everyone has finish their dinner, everyone escorted us to the lobby. we didn't use the elevator since the ballroom was just at the second floor.
before i could walk down the marble stairs that i thought was a nightmare for me because i was wearing a stiff heel and the marble stairs were so many, jin scoop me up and everyone cheered.
i wrapped my arms around his neck as he walked down the stairs while carrying me. everyone was throwing flower petals on us as we walked down the stairs.
hotel customers and staff were also watching as we walked down the stairs and head towards the exit.
we said goodbye to our friends and family. not for so long actually. it's just a farewell that tells that we are husband and wife and we are going to start a new life. i could hear fans cheering and screaming from outside the lobby but i let them for now.
i bid goodbye to iu and hwasa. i bid goodbye to bts members, enhypen and txt and everyone. literally, everyone. like everyone in the hotel.
"alright, sweethearts. let's go", i said before carrying jun-seo. jin carried jun-ha.
as soon as we walked out of the lobby entrance, we were greeted by screams and cheers and also hundreds of camera clicks. camera flashes were prohibited by our management because it stings my eye so bad whenever i get camera flashes. it just hurts and my eyes would be teary.
i smiled and waved towards the cameras and fans. i took jun-seo's hand and motion waving to the public. he has to get used to it and to control his uncomfortable feelings whenever it comes to the cameras and public eyes even though i know it's kinda frustrating sometimes.
since i was still holding the bouquet and i need to throw it first before leaving the hotel, i gave jun-seo to jae-hyuk for a while. without looking back, i throw the bouquet and there were screams and shrieks.
i turned to me back and saw them passing and throwing the bouquet all over around. lastly, namjoon caught it and gave it to hwasa. she took it and then flustered.
the public was going nuts because of that. how do i know? fans were cheering loudly and screaming. i chuckled and grinned.
"after this, we might get a wedding invitation from hwasa!" i announced. they laughed. hwasa scolded me as she blushes. i smirked and laughed. fun to tease her.
"kajja", jin said. i nodded and took jun-seo from jae-hyuk.
"we'll follow you from behind until your apartment", jae-hyuk told me while handing jun-seo back to me. i nodded and thanked him.
just then, a white audi suv stopped in front of us. i waved towards the wedding guests one more time before i entered the car. jin entered from the other side with jun-ha.
i lower my window and so does jin. i waved to both sides. my right side was our fans and my left were our wedding guests. hwasa waved and said goodbye to me and i replied the same.
a few seconds later, the car moves. i could hear police sirens as soon as we exited the hotel compound. i was surprised. this was our first time getting escorted by police.
jin was surprised by that too. our journey back to hannam the hill was smooth and was fast. the whole time in the car, i laid my head on jin's shoulder. both his shoulder was occupied.
one side was jun-ha's head and the other side was me. jun-seo was sitting next to me. the whole ride was silent and we could only hear the police siren.
the 30-minute journey was shortened to 10 minutes because of the police escort. everyone was giving us way and we reached hannam the hill quickly and i was amazed.
we were escorted by big hit security staff and also jae-hyuk to my apartment. reaching my apartment, i thanked the security team and also jae-hyuk who had helped a lot for the wedding especially for security. everything went well smoothly.
after that, they went back and we entered my apartment. or, i can say that it's our apartment already. yeah, we can say that. and – we're back to our normal lives.
bathe the twins. get them back to sleep. after that, we took a bath. well – this time, we were kinda in a romantic mood – so – we took a bath together :)
after washing up and doing night routine, we eat ramyeon together. i even updated my instagram story posting a video of jin and i already changed into casual outfit and eating ramyeon together.
"we have an interview tomorrow morning, right?" jin asked. i nodded.
"what time are they coming here?" he asked me while we eating ramyeon together.
"around ten i think", i said.
"i thought we could get a rest at least a day", he said. i chuckled.
"it's rests too, jinnie. they are the ones who come here and not we come to them", i said while caressing his hair.
"uh, don't do that, my love. you don't want me to get horny while we are having dinner", he said. i laughed and slapped his shoulders. he laughed too.
"i want sex tonight. you're still up for it?" he asked. i chuckled and cupped my mouth.
"it's funny how casual we are talking about we having sex", i said. he chuckled.
"you're my wife already", he said.
"and you're my husband already, husby", i said. he laughed.
"husby? isn't its hubby?" he asked. i laughed and slapped my forehead.
"right. my bad. hubby", i said, correcting my fault. he laughed and shook his head.
after dinner, we talked a while before getting into sexual mood. kissing on the kitchen counter, that's one of my favorites actually. making out on the kitchen counter :)
we get to our bedroom after a few moments heating up. dim lights. naked and heated up. hickeys and soft moans. it was nice knowing that we are already married and i have nothing to worry about what people say of us having sex without getting married.
i'm happy. i feel safe and secure. i feel really comfortable. very comfortable.
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idol lifestyle is not all about having money and fame but also their private life. their relationship with their family. some idol lost their parents, mother, father or siblings. some has problems with their family relationship such as parents' divorce or something that is about family relationship.
for mia, even when she is a child, she never gets acquainted with her family from her father's side because of her parents' marriage and because of money. ahn hye-jin (hwasa) was the only family from her father's side that she is close to.
even idols lose someone they love. taehyung from bts dedicated his song, winter bear to his grandmother who has passed away a few years ago. he grew up most of the time with his grandmother and not his parents. i think he's not really close with his parents because he always mentioned his grandmother and i can see how close he is with his grandmother because he grew up with his grandmother.
idols are like humans too. they have feelings and you can't treat them like an object. you can't treat them like they are yours and they can't date anyone who they want. you can't simply talk shit about them and force them not to talk during a fan meeting.
for example, i saw this on social media. one of the members of twice tzuyu. i'm not sure why but there were fans who shouted at her to not let her talk. the fans shouted "don't talk! shut your mouth!". i was honestly taken aback by that. why would you be so rude to an idol? that's so disrespectful.
the only thing that is different between idols and us, a normal human, well – they are normal human too – but the difference between us and them is just how we treat and look at them. we call them idol because they are popular and they are the person who we look up to.
if there are no fans who are aggressive and pushing and shoving gifts into idol's faces, i don't think idols need securities. but because, there are fans who are really aggressive, they have to have securities and to push the fans away. i'm pretty sure idols don't want to be mobbed in the airport after 11 hours of flight. they are exhausted and need a break.
idols are humans like us. they have feelings and they want to live a normal life. we envy their life because they get a lot of attention and fame and money. but they envy our life. they want to live freely. they can go to the popular mall in the city and not getting recognize and getting mobbed.
they are humans and adults who live their lives as a k-pop idol or artists in their 20s and wants to live like adults in their 20s. partying, meeting friends, going to the cinema. but they just can't because they need to work and to entertain us.
sometimes, i felt pity towards artists who are really popular like bts. they are constantly become the center of attention especially after being the first artist to ever attend the bbmas. and now, they are nominated for the grammys and i have a good feeling that dynamite and bts will win. i hope and i pray.
i envy their life but thinking back, they always say on their documentary movie that they envy normal adult in their 20s life. so, i always think positive and live my life just like that. be grateful and thankful because they are people who envy your life even though you envy other's.
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author's note: i am still contemplating whether i should or not end this book or not. i'm going to publish the next book soon. within this week, i hope. i'll announce to my followers if i published it already. do follow me so that you can get the announcement.
thank you for now :)